I booked a one-night stay at a hostel in the city I moved away from. Check-in time is 15:00 on Monday. I need to get away from here. I need to stop obsessing over someone else's problem and focus on my own shit. I've been too scared to go back. I have unfinished business that I need to deal with, and I can't put it off any longer. I need to remind myself that I didn't run away. I left because I had to, and even though my final memories of the city were painful, that doesn't mean that I should just avoid the place forever. 

Here at home, I'm struggling to accept that the man I fell really hard for is not a good dating prospect after all. Best case scenario, he is really naive, or possibly just doesn't know how to set boundaries with people. At worst, he is a creepy older guy at work who likes to hang out with teenage girls.

A teenager who worked with us in the summer is still in touch with him. She obviously had a crush on him. He was the one who asked for her number. They have been

We were meeting for lunch at the Maplewood Mall
noon you said
and don’t be late like you usually are
but I had forgotten to set the alarm
and my clothes were wrinkled
my hair was a fright
couldn’t find my car keys to save my life
they finally turned up in the vegetable drawer
I put on some lipstick and opened the door
and Monitor lizards were in the front yard
Komodo dragons wherever I looked
and one waddled up as Komodos will do
I gave him

Many old British folk songs are about sex, witches, magicians and pagan entities, ghosts/demons, revenge or bloody and grisly deeds. This one (Child №93), is said to the the tale of revenge by a mason who'd worked for a Northern English or Scottish lord, and hadn't been paid. When I first heard the song News for Noders