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Liberating Motherhood
January Complaint Box - by Zawn Villines
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My responses to the most common and most noteworthy complaints I've gotten this month.
Kiki Bryant/The Uppity Negress: Labor Diggers
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How and why men steal women's labor, and how it's decimating women's lives.
In what ways do I reflexively defend men or other powerful groups?
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Supremacy culture commands respect and seems credible. This encourages folks to align against their own interests.
In what ways have I decided it's too late to change? Deconstructing Patriarchal Thinking
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Change is always possible. Despair wants us to believe otherwise, so we can better serve hierarchical systems.
Is my activism making the world a better place, or a worse one?
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So much of what feels like activism isn't helpful at all--and it may undermine attempts at change.
What acts of abuse do I normalize or excuse?
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Hint: The first ones that come to mind probably aren't the real answer.
How can I discourage my daughters from having children?
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A reader worries about her daughters' future if they choose to have children.
How have I weaponized patriarchal norms against myself?
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Misogyny works best when it's internalized. It's important to think about how patriarchal norms have penetrated your self-criticisms.
In what ways am I privileged, and how can I use that privilege for good?
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We all have some power (I promise!), however small, that we can weaponize in service of something greater.
zawn.substack.com
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Trauma can build a site of solidarity. It can also make us mean. We all have a moral obligation to identify the circumstances in which we are most likely to behave terribly, then reduce engagement.
The problem with Fair Play, and other systems for gaining household equality
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But have you tried equality? And have you tried trying?
Feminist Sticker Bundle for $8
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zawn.substack.com
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A reader worries it's too late to turn her life around, and that she's already lost too much.
How manosphere and red pill ideologies doom men to loneliness and unhappy relationships
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Red pillers set men up for miserable, sexless relationships with women who hate them.
What has worked to change my mind? How can I use that knowledge to inspire others to do and be better?
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Changing minds begins with empathy. Empathy begins with reflecting on what has worked for you.
What do I feel I'm not allowed to want? - by Zawn Villines
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Women are allowed to want things, no matter what patriarchy tells you.
zawn.substack.com
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Patriarchy is a system designed to take resources from women and give them to men. But ultimately, it steals from us all.
'But women can be abusive, too!' Gaslighting inequality series
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We don't have to address women's occasional abuse before tackling men's systematic, rampant abuse.
Virginia Sole-Smith: Anti-Fatness as a Tool of Oppression
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Anti-fatness is about convincing every person (and especially every woman) that their body is wrong. It distracts us from doing what really matters, and we don't have to live this way.
Feminist Advice extravaganza: Short and sweet answers to a bunch of your questions
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Some questions don't warrant a long response. That doesn't mean they're not worth answering at all.
Why don't you hold women accountable for their bad behavior? Feminist Advice Friday paid subscriber bonus
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How can we charge for our work while still promoting equitable access?
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Liberating Motherhood Website
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How sexist men weaponize the silent treatment: The Weapons Men Use series (paid subscriber bonus)
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Zawn and Jeff answer your #FeministAdviceFriday questions: Paid subscriber bonus
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Episode 5: The Epidemic of Sexual Abuse in Marriage
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What is marriage really like? The data on marriage and long-term relationships
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Why 'feminist' men and 'nice guys' get so angry about my work
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Website
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