Coming to Terms with Death

One of the things that I've noticed as I have had the

opportunity to preside over funerals as a pastor is

that the tone, the emotional atmosphere

surrounding a death can vary widely. Some endings

are filled with laughter, memories, and connection.

Others with deep sadness, despair, shock, and even

anger. Many are somewhere between and beyond or

even take place weaving layers of seemingly opposite

emotions upon one another. Many are experienced

differently by different people depending on their

relationship to the deceased. To a long time

caretaker, the final passing may bring a deep sense

of relief and thankfulness that a loved one's "time

had come" is a cause for celebration and

remembrance. Yet, that same final passing, may be

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experienced very differently by an out-of-state

relative who had not yet come to terms with a loved

one's decline. To them, this was a deep and

unrecoverable loss.

You can sometimes even get a sense of things by

what an end-of-life service is called. A "Celebration

of Life" or a Memorial Service or a Funeral.

Death, when it comes, is one of those things that

forces you to come to terms with a new reality.

Sometimes that reality is very much welcomed.

Sometimes it is very much unwelcomed.

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Sometimes, its complicated.

Sometimes, it is all three, all at once.

Sometimes, it is one or another, in their own time.

Whatever the case, when death comes into our lives,

we face a reckoning. Things are no longer going to

be the same.

It is hard to ever be fully prepared for death, but

sometimes people are more prepared or less

prepared. And this preparation, very much

prefigures how one will experience death when it

occurs. I believe the categories of right and wrong

break down when you use them to apply to human

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emotions. Yet, when one is well prepared for the

death of a loved one, it is my observation, that it is

much easier to enter into a space that might be

called a "celebration of life" when that reckoning

comes. This is far harder to do, when death is a

surprise.

In our Scripture today, we read the accounts of

Jesus, the disciples and some Greek visitors who

wanted to see Jesus.

Jesus was busy getting prepared for death. The

Greek visitors and the disciples were not. They were

in the midst of a Passover celebration. This is the

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festival that is referred to in verse 20. Preparing for

death was probably the furthest thing from their

mind. This was a time of cultural and spiritual

celebration.

Jesus was seemingly aloof to the festival

surrounding him. He was waxing philosophical

about death. Busy finding purpose in his own

death. Busy preparing for death.

Friends, at this moment in Lent, this is what Jesus

invites us to do. We're often much more like the

Greek visitors, already busy thinking about Easter

celebrations. We're looking forward to the world

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continuing to open back up. Thinking about Spring

Break and making summer plans. When we come to

Jesus, when we start coming back to church, the

last thing we want to do is to be met with somber

reflection. Perhaps I'm wrong, but as we start to

slowly open back up as a church and get back into a

regular rhythm of things, maybe the tone you

wanted to hear was a bit more upbeat than "let us

prepare our hearts and minds for death."

But friends, that is what Jesus invites us to do this

morning. That is the opportunity we have in this

final Sunday of Lent before Holy Week begins.

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We want life here and now. We want celebration

now. But Jesus teaches us in his words in today's

Scripture and in his actions of the weeks to come,

that death precedes the kind of life that God gives.

The real celebration only begins on the far side of

death.

And here I'm talking about spiritual death. The

entire journey of Lent is a preparation to die to

something within ourselves that we need to let go of.

Something within us needs to die, to fall to the

ground, as Jesus says, so that it may bear much

fruit."

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Throughout his ministry, Jesus waxes and wanes in

popularity amongst the people. Yet, Jesus is never

seduced by popularity. In fact, it seems to be that in

moments where his popularity has reached an apex,

he uses that exact moment to say some of the most

unpopular of things. I know that next week is Palm

Sunday when the people greet Jesus with palm

branches and shouts of hosanna - the true

culmination of his popularity. But in John's gospel,

that encounter immediately precedes our Scripture

today. In fact, it is out of that crowd that the Greek

people mentioned in our Scripture emerge. Into that

moment of popular celebration, Jesus chooses to

enter the town on a simple donkey. It is like being

named CEO of a company and then intentionally

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driving into work the next day in some beat up,

broken down car. Or as one commentator puts it,

""Jesus has gone and procured a donkey, as if in

response to their misplaced enthusiasm for

monarchical might. And after this great and grand

celebration, where the crowds treat him like he is

the Grand Marshall of a homecoming parade, Jesus

meets them with a lecture on death and dying. We

don't know exactly what the Greek visitors wanted

from Jesus, but I don't think this was it.

The truth is, death is uncomfortable. That's true

whether it is the death of a loved one or some kind of

internal spiritual death to some part of ourself. We

know that there is a reckoning that must take place.

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We know things are about to change and it is hard

to know exactly what that will look like. We see it

even in Jesus. Jesus says, "Now my soul is

troubled." This is the point where most of us would

turn back. Jesus considered it. He said, "And what

should I say - 'Father, save me from this hour.'" So

often, we pray to be protected and delivered from the

natural course of things in our world - disease,

death, but also other things too - financial disaster,

ending relationships, conflict with family and

friends, poor decisions, and many other things. Our

prayers often reveal that we treat God as a genie in a

bottle, granting wishes. But in reality, God is the

one who will accompany us on that most difficult of

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journeys - from the preparation to die to the moment

of death itself and then beyond.

Friends, the Lenten journey is not a journey around

pain and discomfort, but rather through it. Each of

you, no doubt, has your own pain and struggles in

life. I know I have mine. I'm not sure why those

Greeks wanted to see Jesus, but the gospel of John

tells us that the crowds gathered around Jesus

because they had seen him raise Lazarus from the

dead. Perhaps these Greeks had their own dead

relatives they wanted Jesus to raise up. They

wanted to be delivered from their pain rather than

have Jesus help them process it.

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Jesus could see that the miracles he was performing

were not always being received as intended. People

want the miracle without the transformation. They

want resurrection without the preparation and

death. This is often a shadow side of Christian faith.

We want the benefits without the costs. We pray for

miracles - to be delivered from situations of pain and

death. But God is not in the wish granting

business. God isn't in this for a popularity contest.

God offers to be there with us in the midst of our

pain and struggles - and yes even death. And in so

doing, God will help to transform that pain and

death into something beautiful, redeeming,

abundant and eternal. But God is not a cosmic pain

killer. Rather, God will guide you towards the kind

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of pain and death you need so that rebirth and

resurrection may occur.

Jesus teaches us today that it was only in dying that

we can bear fruit. It is only in hating life, that we

can have eternal life. If that language rubs you the

wrong way, think about it like this - Jesus is saying

short term pain, for long term gain. God is in the

business of transforming this world and to do so,

God needs servants willing to put others before

themselves. It is only when we think of others needs

before our own, that we can truly shift this world

from one in which we're looking out for ourselves to

one in which love and community are the defining

values. Jesus's glory wasn't found in the raising of

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Lazarus, his adornment by the crowds, and being

sought after by admirers. Rather, it was found in

his selfless love to die for the sake of others, even

though that death was unjust.

For Christians, dying for the sake of others is

glorification. We are a faith of putting others before

our selves. I don't think Christianity would be so

popular if we were more explicit about this. But this

is the true core of the Christian faith.

Our prayer focus this week is spiritual death.

Perhaps you've gone this far in your Lenten journey

and some part of you still looks for what you can get

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out of faith. People often get frustrated with church

because they claim they are not "getting anything

out of it." Friends, this is exactly the problem. This

is how the crowds, the Greeks were approaching

Jesus - what could they get out of him? The point of

faith and church isn't for us to get something out of

it. But rather it is to learn how to die to our own

desires, to learn how to serve others, to begin to hate

this "instant gratification" culture and yearn for

something more eternal and abundant. Friends in

your prayer time this week, on this final week before

Holy Week, may we spend time earnestly seeking

how to serve. How to let God walk with us through

the pain rather than pretend God will take it away.

May we seek to quiet that voice that says, I, I, I - me,

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mine and begin an others-first way of thinking, way

of seeing the world. May we continue to die to

egocentric ways of seeing the world and begin to

adopt an others-centric way of seeing the world.

But here's the hard truth about that - that shift feels

a lot like dying. Lots of attachments and desires will

simply need to go unfulfilled and unmet. But here's

the Easter truth - God has better things in store

than what we can imagine in the here and now. Let

us walk in faith, which so often means walking into

some kind of pain, suffering, abandonment, even

death without any certainty how things will be

resolved. In so walking, we put our full faith in

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Christ, who will draw us all to himself in a glory that

only God can imagine.

Would you pray with me?

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