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Cosmopolitan (PDFDrive)

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100% found this document useful (2 votes)
1K views278 pages

Cosmopolitan (PDFDrive)

Uploaded by

George Angheluta
Copyright
© © All Rights Reserved
We take content rights seriously. If you suspect this is your content, claim it here.
Available Formats
Download as PDF, TXT or read online on Scribd
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Behind
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Put the Kardashian/Jenner crew in
Confession Time
“ I was with Bruce on a commercial airliner in first
class. We had sex in the bathroom, and we thought we
got away with it. But at the end of the flight, the flight
one room together and things get attendant got on the microphone and told the entire
flight, ‘Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Jenner, you just
crazy—and candid. Here’s what joined the mile high club. We’re so proud of you, we’re
they spilled exclusively to Cosmo. giving you a bottle of champagne.’ I could not squish
down in my seat low enough.” —KRIS JENNER

—KRIS JENNER
Cosmo Goals
“ When I was first starting my career, I sat
down with my publicist at the time, and she
asked me what I aspired to do. I remember
looking down and there was a Cosmo with
Megan Fox on it. I said to her, ‘I would love
to be on the cover of Cosmo one day.’ She
looked at me and said, ‘Kim, let’s be realistic.
You’ll never be on the cover of Cosmo. Let’s
have some realistic goals.’ Cut to seven years
later, the 50th anniversary, I’ll send her an
autographed copy.” —KIM KARDASHIAN WEST

DRESS,
Watson x
Watson —KIM KARDASHIAN WEST

Fandemonium
“ When anybody says something to us, I’m always blown away, like,
OMG, they’ve seen our show! When we film, I don’t even think anyone
is watching the show. They are just really expensive home videos. So
it’s crazy to me that I’ve had so many people say that they are fans. Like
Kristen Wiig, when I was in Australia, reached out and said, ‘I would
love to go to dinner with you!’ I was like, how does Kristen Wiig even
know I’m in Australia? It’s just wild. I had to leave that night, otherwise
I would have of course gone to dinner.” —KHLOÉ KARDASHIAN

PHOTO G R A PHED BY (G ROUP SHOT A ND K Y L IE ): F R A NCE SC O C A RROZ Z INI;


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“We like
to stay in
and have COVER
pajama STORIES
parties, Pop a Bottle! It’s
November—and Cosmo’s
order 50th Birthday (217).

Pinkberry,
Sex Up Your Life with our
50 Moves: Ready, Set,

and watch Ohhh! (199) See the


Kardashian/Jenner Klan
Pretty Like You’ve Never Seen
Them Before (173). Do
Woman.” the Easiest Workout for an
Epic Ass! (145) Make
MODEL NADINE LEOPOLD ON Bank at Work! Learn the
BFF (AND PARTNER IN THE #1 Way to Get Ahead Fast
SMIZE) GABBY WESTBROOK, IN (223). Then find Fashion

190
Under $50 (100) and
“DAY TRIPPERS.” Beauty Under $10 (138).
Plus, the Hilarious First
Dates You Won’t Believe
(66) and how to Decode
His Crazy Mind Tricks
(214).

FEATURES
Cosmo’s Guide to the
Modern Period has all the
answers you need (238).

VEST, Sea. BODYSUIT,


DSquared2. SHORTS,
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BOOTS, Sorel. RINGS,
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ENTER FOR A
PHOTOGRAPHED BY JAMES MACARI

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SCORE 1 OF 5 PARTY
PACKS FOR A GIRLS’ NIGHT
IN: FLAT-SCREEN TV,
MOVIES, CASH, SKINNYGIRL
POPCORN! GO TO
COSMOPOLITAN.COM/
GIRLSNIGHTIN
AND SEE PAGE 255
FOR DETAILS.

23
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CONTENTS

150

63 “I lost my
virginity in
a bed of
poison ivy…”
CONFESSIONS
C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P L E F T: A N D I E L L O W AY/ T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T. C O M ; T E R R Y R I C H A R D S O N /A R T PA R T N E R ; B E N G O L D S T E I N / S T U D I O D .

217 124
CULTURE CRUSH STYLE BEAUTY BODY
Do Double Takes (71) at Winter is coming.…Time Trolling Sephora for the Killer heels can hurt like in every issue
our sexy roundup of celeb to Bundle Up (85). Swap products of tomorrow? hell, so see Fitness Buzz 32 50 Things to Do
dopplegängers. Then get your old outerwear for Look no further, The (150) for some feel-good This Month
to know the Cosmo Guy some chic Top Coats (86), Future Is Now (107). moves. Then find ways to
46 Cosmotivation
behind everyone’s favorite and Look Hot Tonight in a Get a lesson in beauty make water less boring in
breakup anthem (72). Go badass pairing of Plaid & geography with Pretty in Food Buzz (154). And ask 48 From the Editor
from Safe to Sexy without Leather (94). Need a dose Another City (130), and your local university, Why 52 In Her Own Words
getting Skanky (74). Plus, of instant polish? Handle best-selling author Naomi the Hell Are Tanning Beds 250 Horoscope
Fun, Fearless…Fail! (78) It! (96) Then Ask Stacy Wolf reveals “Why I Went on Campus? (158) 254 Bitch It Out!/
Now #RealTalk: Are You London what not to wear Blonde” (132). Sport Sexy Shopping
Riding the Hate Train? (104). Beauty All Month Long
Information
(80) (140), and look Out-of-
This-World Hot (184). 256 Cosmo Quiz: Should
You Loosen Up?

NOVEMBER 2015 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ 25


RALPH LAUREN

INTRODUCING
INTENSE

RED # POLORED
FACEBOOK.COM/RALPHLAURENFRAGRANCES
ULTA AND ULTA.COM
CONTENTS
LOVE LUST
Think you and your bae are
meant to be? Read “I Saw
the Signs” (206). Get
inside the male mind with
Ask Him Anything (210)
and Manthropology (214).
Then check out Sex Q&A
(212) for any crazy or
kinky questions you’re too
afraid to ask.

WORK

M I S T Y: H E N R Y L E U T W I L E R /C O N T O U R B Y G E T T Y I M AG E S . B AG : S T UA R T T Y S O N / S T U D I O D. B E AU T Y: M AT T H E W Q U I N L A N . S E E PAG E 2 5 4 F O R S H O P P I N G I N F O R M AT I O N .
Stop apologizing for being
ambitious and Dream
Bigger! (223) Then Dress
for the Job You Want
(234), from head to
stiletto.

WIN IT!
THIS LUANA ITALY BAG,
FILLED WITH THE
SEASON’S LATEST
BEAUTY PRODUCTS,
COULD BE YOURS!
ENTER FOR YOUR
CHANCE TO WIN AT
COSMOPOLITAN.COM/
LUANAITALY2015.
FOR DETAILS, SEE
PAGE 255.

“I hope that
my voice is

162
helping to
change the
perception
of ballet…”
WORLD-CLASS BALLERINA MISTY
COPELAND, PLUS THE REST OF
COSMO’S FUN, FEARLESS 50.

A L L T HE K A R D ASH IAN C OVE RS


For fashion credits on all Kardashian covers, please
see page 254. To get these covers’ looks, try Bronze
Goddess Powder Bronzer, Brow Defining Pencil in
Dark Brunette, Pure Color Envy Sculpting EyeShadow
5-Color Palette in Defiant Nude, Little Black Liner,
and Little Black Primer, all by Estée Lauder. Styled by
Elizabeth Stewart. Hair: Kris, Kim: Chris McMillan for
Living Proof @ SoloArtists.com. Khloé: Jen Atkin for
Wella Professionals at The Wall Group. Kourtney: Peter
Savic at Opus Beauty. Kendall, Kylie: Scott Cunha for
TheOnly.Agency using Oribe and Kardashian Beauty.
A B C D Makeup: Kris, Kylie: Joyce Bonelli. Kim, Khloé: Mario
Dedivanovic at The Wall Group. Kendall, Kourtney: Rob
Scheppy for Cloutier Remix using Tweezerman Brush IQ.
THE MODELS PHOTOGRAPHED IN COSMOPOLITAN ARE USED FOR ILLUSTRATIVE PURPOSES
ONLY; COSMOPOLITAN DOES NOT SUGGEST THAT THE MODELS ACTUALLY ENGAGE IN THE Manicure: Kris, Kim: Kailey Phan. Khloé, Kylie: Kimmie
CONDUCT DISCUSSED IN THE STORIES THEY ILLUSTRATE. Kyees for Orly Int’l. Kendall, Kourtney: Kim Truong.

28 Production: First Shot Productions. Fashion Director:


Aya Kanai. Photographed by Francesco Carrozzini.
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1 3
TEXT A N D TW EET
without the struggle:
Logitech’s Keys-to - Go
keyboard hooks up to 2. HONOR a
your phone or tablet Turkey Day tradi-
($70, logitech.com). tion and watch
the Macy’s
Thanksgiving Day
Parade in your
pj’s (NBC).
S H A K E U P a Bond-
worthy martini with
Belvedere’s 007 Silver

50
Saber vodka as Spectre
hits theaters (Nov. 6).

4. CHECK OUT
the OG versions
of your favorite
characters at the
Cooper Hewitt
museum’s Pixar:
The Design of Story
(cooperhewitt.org).

8. HEAD through the Look-


ing Glass with Marc by
Marc Jacobs’ Alice-

THINGS
inspired collab with Disney
($88, marcjacobs.com).

TODO
7. P OU R a cold
one (or three)
before a Thanks-

C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P L E F T: L O G I T E C H ; G E T T Y I M A G E S ; C O U R T E S Y B E LV E D E R E V O D K A ; D I S N E Y P I X A R ; J O N K O PA L O F F/
giving smack-

THIS
down: Packers vs.

FILMMAGIC; T WENTIE TH CENTURY FOX & PE ANUTS WORLDWIDE LLC; GE T T Y IMAGES; COURTESY MARC JACOBS.
Bears, Cowboys
vs. Panthers, or
Eagles vs. Lions.

MONTH

5
6. JOU R N A L your way to
Lea Michele levels of goal
fulfillment with her new
book, You First.

R OO T for the underdogs— Charlie Brown and the Snoop —in their first big-screener, The Peanuts Movie (Nov. 6).

32
©2014 CHANEL®, Inc. COCO®, The Classic Bottle®, B®

AVAILABLE AT CHANEL .COM


9
19. G E T I N
18. GIVE THANKS to your
L I N E E A R LY.
fam or friends with a Flatter-
Balmain’s
box filled with uplifting
collection for
words from their loved ones
H&M hits
(flatterbox.com).
stores Nov. 5
(Balmain x
H&M, $399,
hm.com).

P OW E R U P your pout
with Estée Lauder’s
Pure Color Env y Liq-
uid Lip Potion in
Lethal Red ($30, estee
lauder.com). Kendall
Jenner’s a fan!

10. READ UP on Sex


and the Single Girl and Sex
and the Office by Cosmo’s
pioneering editor-in-chief
Helen Gurley Brown—
now in e-book form (open 20. BUNDLE UP.
roadmedia.com). A jacket from
11. BRACE YOURSELF Mackage and
for the epic final chapter Paul & Joe keeps
of The Hunger Games. 17. CELEBRATE
you chic in bone-
Katniss goes all or nothing trans rights chilling temps
in Mockingjay, Part 2 (and advocates (mackage.com).
(Nov. 20). like Laverne
12. STAND UP for wom- Cox) this Trans-
en’s rights, like the fear- gender Aware-
less heroes of the UK’s ness Week
(Nov. 14 to 20).

C O U R T E SY BA L M A IN; C O U R T E SY M AC K AG E ; G E T T Y IM AG E S; I S TO C K ; C O U R T E SY K AT E S PA DE ; DE A N NE V IL L E / B FA N YC.C O M.
B E N G O L D S T E I N / S T U D I O D . S T Y L I S T: M E L I S S A N I C O L E B U C K F O R R J B E N N E T T R E P R E S E N T S . C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P R I G H T:
early voting equality
movement in the drama
Suffragette (Oct. 23).
16. S E E Keira
13. GAWK. Michael B. Knightley live
Jordan is a boxer in Rocky as she works a
spin-off Creed, so...plenty love triangle in
of shirtless scenes. Need 21. PREPARE to be on
her Broadway
we say more? (Nov. 25) the edge of your seat
debut, Thérèse
during Room, based on
14. GO META. Angelina Raquin (Oct. 1).
the suspenseful best-
Jolie directs Brangelina seller (Oct. 16).
as a married couple in
By the Sea (Nov. 13). 22. SUSS OUT these
three films getting early
15. GET SPOOKED. Daniel awards-season buzz
Radcliffe plays assistant and align the Oscar pool

24
to James McAvoy’s 23. DRINK TO the odds in your favor: The
mad scientist in Victor Coke bottle. Its fly Danish Girl Eddie Red-
Frankenstein (Nov. 25). figure turns 100 mayne goes for back-to-
years young Nov. 16. back statuettes as the
turn-of-the-century
trans woman Lili Elbe
(Nov. 27). Carol Cate
Blanchett romances
Rooney Mara in this lush
1950s-set drama (Nov.
20). Steve Jobs Michael
Fassbender stars as
Apple’s iCzar in this
juicy biopic (Oct. 9).

I N DU L G E I N Kate Spade and Magnolia Baker y ’s sweet collab of accessories ($348, katespadeny.com).

34
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Neutrogena¨ Makeup Remover Cleansing Towelettes
Ordinary cleansers may not thoroughly remove makeup
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©Neutrogena Corp. 2015


25
26. TAKE IT OFF right
now. There are 501
sexy moves to try in
Cosmo’s latest DIY book
Let’s Get Naked.
W E L C OM E
Aziz Ansari back
to T V with a long
overdue starring
role in his new,
think-y comedy,
Master of None
(Nov. 6, Netflix).

27. ADOPT A TURKEY.


Have a guilt-free Thanks-
giving: Donate $30 to
Farm Sanctuary to spon-
JESS GLYNNE
29
The dynamite “Rather Be” singer talks debut album I Cry When I Laugh.
sor a rescued turkey
(farmsanctuary.org). ON HER ALBUM ON INFLUENCES: ON SAM SMITH: ON MUSICAL HORI-
28. RUB ELBOWS with NAME: “The album “Whitney and Mariah “He’s a friend of mine. ZONS: “I’m a North
Cosmo staff and speakers comes from a place were the pinnacles. He didn’t just have a London girl, and I am
who #RunTheWorld at our of sadness, but a I would record record—he’s made very London. But my
annual Fun Fearless Life heartbreak album myself singing ‘Hero’ people feel. If I family introduced
event in NYC, Nov. 14 isn’t me. I chose to on a tape player could do half of that, me to all different
(funfearlesslife.com). find the positive.” until I got it exact.” I’d be very happy.” worlds of music.”

30 31 32 33 34

B O OK S / S T E RL IN G PUB L I S HIN G; A DME DI A / S PL A S H NE W S; B E N GOL D S T E IN / S T UDIO D; C O U R T E SY TO M S X N AT I O N A L G EO G R A PHI C.


RECORDS; COURTESY SONY MUSIC NASHVILLE; COURTESY INTERSCOPE RECORDS. FROM TOP: BOBBY BANK / WIREIMAGE; HEARST
M U S I C, C LO C K W I S E F RO M TOP: C O U R T E SY AT L A N T I C REC O RD S ( 2); C O U R T E SY DI S NE Y M U S I C G RO UP; C O U R T E SY IN T E R S C OPE
LANA DEL REY CARRIE BØRNS Synth DEMI LOVATO CHARLIE PUTH
The queen of UNDERWOOD symphonies Learn the lyrics The “See You
stirring cine- ends a three- abound on the to every feel- Again” singer
matic cuts drops year break alt rocker’s good anthem is center stage
Honeymoon. (woot!) with Dopamine. on Confident. on Nine Track
Storyteller. Mind.

36. TEST your pop-


35. F L A S H
culture IQ (and count
designer
the celeb cameos) as
Karen Walk-
Billy Eichner’s Billy on
er’s beauty
the Street returns for
accessories for
a hilarious fourth sea-
Sephora—too
son (Oct. 8, TruTV).
cool to be kept

39
in a makeup 37. INDULGE in
bag ($48, the gorge costumes
sephora.com). and the scandalous
drama of the ballet
world in gritty new
series Flesh and Bone
(Nov. 8, Starz).
38. GO WILD. Toms
and National Geo-
graphic team up for a
new line that’s comfy,
fierce, and gives a boost
to endangered felines
($59, toms.com).

T U N E I N. Carrie and Brad eight-peat (it’s a thing) as hosts of the CMAs on Nov. 4, then catch the AMAs Nov. 22 (ABC).

36 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


ALL-NEW

MORE DURABLE
THAN IPAD AIR
The Fire HD 8 is our all-new powerhouse tablet that’s almost twice as
durable as iPad Air 2. With an HD screen, quad-core processor,
and access to 38 million movies, TV episodes, songs, books, apps
and more, it’s the perfect device for entertainment.

Starting at $149.99

Engineered by
COSMO READS
Fiction
41
43

44
40. AFTER ALICE, by Gregory
Maguire A new twist on Alice 40
(of Wonderland fame) from the
author of Wicked. 42

41. DC TRIP, by Sara Benin-


casa Not even Olivia Pope
could fix this teacher’s out-of-
control outing to the capital.
42. THE HEART YOU CARRY
HOME, by Jennifer Miller An
army daughter and wife has
plenty of wounds to heal.
43. THE MARE, by Mary
Gaitskill Hold on tight: A poi-
gnant story of a city teen and
her horse is anything but tame.
44. DEAR MR. YOU, by Mary-
Louise Parker M.L.P. pens
poetic and often hilarious let-
ters to the men in her life.

Celeb Inspiration
45. MY JOURNEY, by Donna
Karan The legendary designer
and modern queen of the little
black dress tells all.
46. DIVA RULES, by Michelle
Visage A study in self-empow-
erment from the endlessly GIF-
able RuPaul’s Drag Race judge.
47. BRAVE ENOUGH, by Cheryl
Strayed Prime your Pinterest
for nuggets from this book of
quotables by the Wild author.

B E N G O L D S T E I N / S T U D I O D . S T Y L I S T: M E L I S S A N I C O L E B U C K F O R R J B E N N E T T R E P R E S E N T S .
48. THE ART OF GRACE, by
Sarah L. Kaufman Like charm
school in written form: A Pulit-
zer Prize–winning dance critic
enlightens us on elegance.
49. WILDFLOWER, by Drew
Barrymore D.B. tells her story,

50
from her rowdy early years to
her happy, healthy present.

45 46 47 48 49

Y E S F O R S UC C E S S . Queen of must-see TV Shonda Rhimes spills how one little word changed everything in Year of Yes.

38 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


Cocktail of
the Month
TEQUILA

This twist on a classic


(from Mary Giuliani’s new
book, The Cocktail Party) is
reason enough to celebrate.
1½ ounces tequila
1 ounce white cranberry juice
½ ounce fresh lime juice
½ ounce Cointreau

Shake with ice, and serve


straight up.

Editor-in-Chief CONTRIBUTORS Anna Breslaw; Mika PHOTO PRODUCTION COORDINATOR ASSOCIATE ENTERTAINMENT
Brzezinski; Matthew Hussey; Logan Naomi Nishi EDITOR Eliza Thompson
JOANNA COLES Hill; Ian Kerner, PhD; Abigail Pesta; PHOTO ASSISTANT Sarah Eckinger SENIOR PHOTO EDITOR
Alexa von Tobel; Aurora Tower Kathleen Kamphausen
EXECUTIVE EDITOR Leslie Yazel HEALTH ADVISORY BOARD Jennifer COPY AND RESEARCH SOCIAL-MEDIA EDITOR Madeline Haller
CREATIVE DIRECTOR Theresa Griggs Ashton, MD; Mitchell Creinin, MD; COPY DIRECTOR Ann Bacon Wright ASSISTANT SOCIAL-MEDIA EDITOR
EXECUTIVE MANAGING EDITOR Hannah Davis, CSCS; David J. Leffell, RESEARCH DIRECTOR Chris Moore Caitlin Scott
John Dioso MD; Stephanie Middleberg, RD; Holly DEPUTY COPY CHIEF GRAPHIC DESIGNER Lauren Ahn
EXECUTIVE FASHION DIRECTOR Phillips, MD; Marisa Weiss, MD; Ester Brooke Friedman COPY EDITOR Heeseung Kim
Aya Kanai Jennifer Wider, MD COPY EDITOR Carlee Schepeler ASSOCIATE EDITOR Tess Koman
EXECUTIVE BEAUTY DIRECTOR ASSISTANT FASHION AND BEAUTY
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SENIOR FASHION EDITOR FREELANCE CONTRIBUTORS
Dana Stern Schwartz Executive Creative Director/International Branding
James Worthington DeMolet Jenna Andrews (Photo), Deirdre Galvin Peter Yates Fashion/Entertainment Director
DIRECTOR OF STRATEGY AND
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FASHION EDITORS Aeyung Kim, Galgey, Shahrzad Golchin Associates Jessie
DEPUTY EDITORS Katie L. Connor, PUBLIC RELATIONS
Adam Mansuroglu Ajluni, Liz Anagnost, Rosa Bordallo, Quincy
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ASSISTANT FASHION EDITOR
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Laura Brounstein
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P H O T O G R A P H E D B Y B E N G O L D S T E I N . F O O D S T Y L I S T: J A M I E K I M M .

DESIGN DIRECTOR Susannah Haesche COSMOPOLITAN.COM Editor, Azerbaijan Aygun Mustafayeva Editor,
Linda Quinones, Jenna Wojciechowski
Brazil Juliana De Mari Editor, Britain Farrah Storr
BOOKINGS ASSISTANT Sean McIntyre EDITOR Amy Odell Editor, Bulgaria Detelina Stamenova Editor, Chile
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P R O P S T Y L I S T: A L M A M E L E N D E Z . G L A S S : O N E K I N G S L A N E .

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Lori Fradkin
M. Ryan Purdy DEPUTY BEAUTY EDITOR Jessica Matlin Stalo Papanastasiou Editor, Czech Republic
ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Patti Greco Sabrina Karasova Editor, Estonia Kelly Kipper
SENIOR EDITORS Danielle McNally, SENIOR BEAUTY EDITOR Loni Venti Editor, Finland Stina Mantyniemi Editor, France
EXECUTIVE LIFESTYLE EDITOR Helin Jung
Julie Vadnal SENIOR ASSOCIATE BEAUTY EDITOR Sylvie Overnoy Editor, Germany Anja Delastik
MUSIC AND ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR MANAGING EDITOR Alexandra Martell Editor, Greece Lydia Papaioannou Editor, Hong
Deanna Pai Kong Ruqiyah Law Kam Ying Editor, Hungary
Sergio Kletnoy SENIOR SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS EDITOR
ASSISTANT BEAUTY EDITOR Johanna Sabján Editor, India Nandini Bhalla
SENIOR ASSOCIATE EDITOR Emma Barker Editor, Indonesia Fira Basuki Editor, Italy
Lauren Balsamo
SEX AND RELATIONSHIPS EDITORS Francesca Delogu Editor, Kazakhstan Aziza
Emily C. Johnson Yesmaganbetova Editor, Korea Hyun Joo Kim
ASSOCIATE EDITOR Judith Ohikuare
ART Frank Kobola, Lane Moore Editor, Latin America Ana Victoria Taché Editor,
ART DIRECTOR Jose Fernandez SOCIAL DIRECTOR Elisa Benson Latvia Gundega Bicevska Editor, Lithuania
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DEPUTY ART DIRECTOR Danielle Jones Violeta Kalikauskiene Editor, Malaysia Editor,
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Editor, Singapore Jo Upcraft Editor, Slovenia
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EXECUTIVE ASSISTANT TO PHOTOGRAPHY DIRECTOR WEB EDITOR, COSMO FOR LATINAS Lund Editor, Spain Ana Ureña Editor, Taiwan Lo
Ya Chien Editor, Thailand Pimsiri Jaiya Editor,
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BOOKS EDITOR-AT-LARGE Camille Perri PHOTO EDITOR Allie Kircher POP-CULTURE EDITOR Alex Rees Bazdreva Editor, Vietnam

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ARE YOU DRAWN TO


THE DARK-SIDE?
Like Betty Beaumont on ABCÕs WICKED CITY, some of us just donÕt see him comingÉ
the guy that brings out something inside of us that we normally donÕt let anyone see.
TAKE THE QUIZ below to find out if youÕre the kind of girl who releases her inhibitions,
or stays the good girl despite what you may feel.

1. If the guy youÕre seeing BREAKDOWN


wanted to do something that
Mostly AÕs
may not be legal, how likely Dangerously Devoted
are you to help him out? 3. ItÕs 11:45pm on a Friday Similar to Betty, you may be drawn
A. Oooh, sounds fun! IÕm ready to night, youÕre home and your to his mysterious demeanor and
live dangerously. exhilarated by your guyÕs strange
guy calls you up to go out. kinks. He may even enlighten you
B. Maybe, depends on what it isÉ WhatÕs your reply? with new experiences, but donÕt
a little thrill is kind of hot. ignore all the red flags you see
C. No way! IÕm calling the cops. A. I canÕtÉI shouldnÕtÉOk, I will. and beware of the dangers that
B. IÕm actually already out, come could lie ahead. BET T Y
2. YouÕre a good girl, and you meet me.
meet a very handsome and C. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Mostly BÕs
Loving But Legal
very bad boy. Do youÉ 4. Your BF wants to try Like Dianne, youÕve seen what
A. Turn over a new leaf and try a little role playing in the the dark-side is like and know
something wild and different? enough about it to enjoy being
B. Tread lightly, maybe heÕs not bedroom and it may be a the fun, edgy, good kind of bad
that bad? little outside your comfort girl without getting yourself
C. Just say, Òlater loser.Ó I donÕt need zone. What do you say? wrapped up with the wrong kind
of bad boy.
that drama in my life! A. Um, no I canÕt. But, wait, how DIANNE
do I do it? Like this? Ok. Mostly CÕs
B. YouÕre a little crazy, how about Straight Shooting Gal
we try it my way! YouÕve heard enough bad boy
dating stories from your friends
C. Not going to happen. Not now. and in the news to know that
Not ever! you want no part of that in your
life. While some of their stories
may pique at your curiosity,
like Karen, you decide you have
enough going on already without
dealing with the extra drama.
K AREN
IN 1982,
THE SUNSET STRIP
WAS KILLER

W CKED CITY NEW SERIES


OCT 27
TUESDAYS 10|9c
#WickedCity
@ZBocka
Good to see @Cosmopolitan cover heavy lifting in the September issue.

Cosmotivation
#DeadLift #BenchPress #SquatRack #WeightRoomTakeover

COSMO
TELL US WHAT PAW-TY TIME! CONVO

W A R N I N G : S O M E R E A D E R S H A V E R E C E I V E D E - M A I L S F R O M P E O P L E P R E T E N D I N G T O B E F R O M C O S M O P O L I TA N , C L A I M I N G T O B E L O O K I N G F O R N E W M O D E L S A N D R E Q U E S T I N G P E R S O N A L I N F O . T H E S E E - M A I L S A R E A S C A M —
Y O U M A Y W A N T T O R E P O R T T H E M T O L O C A L L A W E N F O R C E M E N T. T H E C O N T E N T O F A L L S U B M I S S I O N S ( I N C L U D I N G L E T T E R S A N D P H O T O G R A P H S ) S H O U L D B E O R I G I N A L A N D B E C O M E S P R O P E R T Y O F C O S M O P O L I TA N , W H I C H
“‘My Boss Sexually

C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P : A C A L U S T U D I O / S T O C K S Y ; C O U R T E S Y @ S I M P L Y P E A N U T ; A N T H O N Y M A N D L E R . T W E E T S , I N S TA G R A M S , A N D “ S H O W U S Y O U R C O S M O ” E N T R I E S M A Y H A V E B E E N E D I T E D F O R L E N G T H A N D C L A R I T Y.
YOU THINK OF

R E S E R V E S T H E R I G H T T O R E P U B L I S H A N D E D I T A L L C O R R E S P O N D E N C E R E C E I V E D . B Y M A K I N G A S U B M I S S I O N , Y O U G U A R A N T E E T H AT Y O U P O S S E S S A L L N E C E S S A R Y R I G H T S T O G R A N T T H E M AT E R I A L T O C O S M O P O L I TA N .
Harassed Me —
COSMO AND OUR MOMS TAUGHT US and a Jury Awarded
YOU COULD TO ALWAYS SEND THANK-YOU Me $18 Million’
And an extra- NOTES...SO THANKS TO
WIN $5,000! special thanks brought back a lot
Take our super- with sprinkles on BATISTE, EUROPEAN WAX of horrible memo-
quick online top to the best CENTER, BEBE, OLAY, AND ries but also edu-
survey and partner in partying, SALLY HANSEN FOR HELPING cated me. I was in a
boom—you’ll CoverGirl! US CELEBRATE COSMO’S similar situation and
automatically 50TH BIRTHDAY! hate that it’s too late
be entered for to do what I should
Keep an eye out
a chance to have done. Thanks
for their special b-day
win $5,000.
wishes in this issue. for publishing.”
Visit November —KATHERINE A., 26
Survey
.Cosmopolitan “I have learned that
.com to get it’s okay to admit
started. that you are vulner-
able. #Sexual
Harassment via
@Cosmopolitan”
—@YASMINE_TFT,
VIA TWITTER

“Great case study


KAN’T GET of how harassment
ENOUGH works from
K-SISTERS? @AbigailPesta
SOLVED YO’ in Cosmo.
PERIOD #RageRead”
PROBLEMS? —@CHADBOUCHARD,
VIA TWITTER
E-mail your
thoughts to
Inbox@
Cosmopolitan @M A RT I N E SA N S OUC Y
.com, visit
Cosmopolitan Thank you, @Cosmopolitan, for
.com to comment,
or tweet us
the surprise this month....It
@Cosmopolitan. made my day...uh, and evening.
Holy shit. @JustinBieber

SHOW US
YOUR COSMO @ Si m pl yP ea
nu t
How does Gotta ke ep m
y fem in in ity
Cosmo fit into ho w. @C os mop some-
ol ita n #MyC os
your life? —CPL. ESTEFA mo
NIA CHAVARRIA,
Instagram or U.S. ARMY

tweet your
photo to
@Cosmopolitan
and include MORE GOOD NEWS
#MyCosmo. If
we feature you FOR BELIEBERS
in the mag, we’ll HIS NEW ALBUM
give you $50! DROPS NOVEMBER 13.

46 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


www.marcjacobsfragrances.com macy’s & macys.com
FROM THE EDITOR THINGS I’M TUCKING
INTO THIS FALL:
LANDS’ END’S CABLE-
KNIT SWEATER AND
TWO NEW MUST-
READS: ONE BY THE
PULITZER PRIZE–
WINNING STACY
SCHIFF AND THE
OTHER BY THE LYRICAL
IN FASHION, ONE RACHEL KELLY. BRING
DAY YOU’RE IN, AND ON THE FIRE AND
THE NEXT DAY…WELL, MULLED WINE.
YOU KNOW. COSMO’S
FAB FASHION DIRECTOR,
AYA KANAI, JUDGES
THE DESIGNERS OF TURTLENECK
TOMORROW ON PROJECT SWEATER, Lands’
RUNWAY JUNIOR, UMBRELLA-ELLA So that’s where all my lost umbrellas End, $369,
PREMIERING are. JK. Stumbled upon this amazing art installation on
NOVEMBER 12 ON landsend.com
LIFETIME. vacation in Provence.

CHANGING THE
SPELLING OF MY
LAST NAME—
JOANNA KOLES.
IT WORKS,
RIGHT?

WE’RE THRILLED
TO BE GETTING
A BOOST FROM
SPONSOR
MAYBELLINE
NEW YORK FOR
OUR SECOND
IT TAKES A VILLAGE
FUN FEARLESS
LIFE IN NYC,
Actually, it took a NOV. 14. GET
small nation to pull YOUR TIX AT

This
off our Kardashian FUNFEARLESSLIFE

B E N G O L D S T E I N / S T U D I O D ( 5 ) ; C O U R T E S Y S A L LY H A N S E N ; N A O M I N I S H I ; A L L I E K I R C H E R ;
cover shoot in L.A. .COM.
COSMOPOLITAN EDITOR JOANNA COLES So fun hanging out
MAYBELLINE NEW
with them all
SHARES HER OBSESSIONS THIS MONTH. YORK The
C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P L E F T: C O U R T E S Y L I F E T I M E ; C O U R T E S Y J O A N N A C O L E S ;
together. Hoping for Falsies Push
FOR MORE, FOLLOW @JOANNACOLES.

Happened
an invite to their Up Drama
next family meeting. Mascara,
$9.50,
drugstores

THIS NOVEMBER 10,


JOIN COSMO SENIOR
DEPUTY EDITOR
AFTER MONTHS SARA AUSTIN AND
OF SEARCHING, ME IN BEDSIDER.ORG’S
I FINALLY CAMPAIGN TO SHOW
COMMITTED TO THIS SOME LOVE TO THE
LITTLE PILL THAT
FRANCESCO CARROZZINI.

AKRIS LEATHER
BOMBER. NOW CHANGED EVERYTHING.
WE’RE TOGETHER #THXBIRTHCONTROL
FOREVER. ON INSTA, TWITTER,
AND SNAPCHAT.
SKIPPING THE SALON
THIS MONTH? SALLY
HANSEN’S MIRACLE
GEL TOP COAT IS THE
ULTIMATE TIME-SAVER.
SHE IS LEGEND Feminist pioneer Gloria Steinem
(left) invited Team Cosmo to her NYC apartment SALLY HANSEN Miracle
for an intimate chat about equal pay, reproductive Gel Top Coat, $10,
48 rights, and of course, sex. drugstores
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I N H E R OW N WO R D S

Nickname:
My favorite thing to
do with North is:
Favorite
karaoke song:

Pet peeve:

Spirit emoji:

I overuse The sexiest thing


this word: in my closet:

I never leave the


house without:

People would
be surprised to
know that Kanye
and I talk about:

The best thing my


mom ever taught me:
I M AG E S; N C; M I L A N L I P OW S K I / I S TO C K ; K AYO/ S H U T T E R S TO C K .
FROM TOP: FELIPE RAMALES/SPL ASH NEWS/CORBIS; GET T Y

The thing I’m


most proud of:

52
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I N H E R OW N WO R D S

Nickname:

My first kiss was:

Favorite
Thanksgiving food: Pet peeve:

My biggest
turn-on: The best thing my
mom ever taught me:

The thing I’m I overuse this word:


most proud of is:

I always
The last thing I karaoke to:
watched on my
DVR or online:

The most
surprising thing
My happy place: that I own:

The person who Favorite KUWTK


inspires me most is: moment:
FROM TOP: VIPIX /SPL ASH NEWS; GET T Y IMAGES (3).

Here’s what people


always get wrong My biggest turn-off:
about our family:

54 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ MONTH 2015


56
Favorite cocktail:
moment:
relationship advice I

Favorite KUWTK
Who said:
The best

ever got was from:


Nicknames:

My best trait is:


Pet peeve:
I N H E R OW N WO R D S

me about:
Everyone in

DVR or online:
The last thing I
watched on my
my family teases

about our family:


always get wrong
Here’s what people
I feel sexiest when:

FROM TOP: SPL ASH NEWS; GET T Y IMAGES; MAGNOLIA PICTURES/EVERET T COLLECTION; GET T Y IMAGES (2). NE XT
SPRE AD, MIDDLE: SPL ASH NE WS. KRIS: GE T T Y IMAGE S (3). KHLOÉ, FROM TOP: PHILIP FRIEDMAN/STUDIO D; MARTIN
H A R V E Y/A L A M Y. K E N D A L L , F R O M T O P : T W E N T I E T H C E N T U R Y F O X / C O U R T E S Y N E A L P E T E R S C O L L E C T I O N ; G E T T Y I M A G E S .
I N T H E I R OW N WO R D S

Nickname:

Favorite cocktail:

My mantra:

The last thing I


watched on my
DVR or online:

The thing I’m


most proud of is:

My happy place:

Here’s what people


always get wrong
about our family:

58
Nickname:
The best thing my
mom ever taught me:

This year,
I’m thankful for:

Pet peeve:
The key to getting
over a breakup is:

Everyone in my family
*Check out Khloé’s new
teases me about: book, Strong Looks Better
Naked, available wherever
books are sold November 3.

Nickname: First celebrity crush:

I overuse this word: Favorite KUWTK moment:

Favorite
Thanksgiving food:
My first kiss was:

How I’m going to


celebrate my birthday:
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NEW
C ON F E S S IONS
WE KNOW YOU HAVE
CONFESSIONS TO
SHARE....E-MAIL THE
DIRTY DETAILS TO
EDITED BY
CONFESSIONS@
COSMOPOLITAN.COM, M A RINA KHIDEKELI
OR TWEET YOUR TALES
TO @COSMOPOLITAN!

YOU REVEAL
YOUR MOST
EMBARRASSING,
RIDICULOUS,
WHAT-WAS-I-
THINKING
MOMENTS.

1“On Sunday
nights, I do face
masks. They’re
bright blue or
green, and I look
like a demon with
them on. I scare
food-delivery
people when I
answer the door.”
—EMILY F., 28, BUYER, CHICAGO, IL

PHOTO G R A PHED BY ME REDI T H JENK S


RE P OR T ED BY E MILY C. JOHNSON 63
C ON F E S S I ON S

2
“I LOST MY VIRGINITY IN A BED OF POISON

3
5 6 GUY CONFESSION

“I’M SO GULLIBLE .
MY MOM HAD ME
“EVERY TIME “ I L I E D A B OU T
M Y V I RGI N I T Y

I SING IN THE
DRIVE FOUR HOURS U N T I L I F I N A L LY
TO SEE A ‘GENIUS’ L O S T I T AT 22 .
PEDICURIST FOR I WOU L D M A K E

SHOWER, U P S T OR I E S
MY INGROWN
NAIL . TURNS OUT,
A B OU T S E X I

7
MY DOG
WE WERE PICKING
WA S N ’ T H AV I NG.”
UP A SURPRISE —ROB S., 27, SOCIAL-MEDIA
YORKIE PUPPY.” MANAGER, BROOKLYN, NY

HOWLS AND
—ANNIE A., 21, TV ASSIS-
TANT, LOS ANGELES, CA

SCRATCHES
“I went hiking with my
4
boyfriend on some deep
“ I S PE N D E V E RY wooded trails. We were

AT THE DOOR
DAY AT M Y JOB PR E- both getting flirty, so I
walked ahead of him
T E N DI NG T O D O and pulled down my
S T U F F, B U T I ’ M

IN PROTEST.”
shorts to show him my
AC T UA L LY R E A DI NG booty. Unfortunately,
JOH N G R E E N B O OK S he wasn’t the only one
ON M Y K I N DL E .” —GEETA A., 34, PHYSICIAN,
looking. Another couple
—JAMIE O., 21 NEW YORK, NY
had just walked up
behind us and saw my
entire ass.” —HALEY J., 20

64 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


IVY. THAT WAS FUN.” —HEATHER C., 21

11 “I love the
smell of gasoline.
I inhale so deeply
every time I’m at
the gas station that
it has to be toxic.”
—MILAN S., 31

12 “I spent half
an hour meticu-
lously gluing on fake
nails before a date.
While we were eat-
ing, one of them
flew off and landed
in the guy’s mashed
potatoes. I felt so

9
bad that I paid for
the whole dinner.”
—JENNIFER J., 27
GUY CONFESSION
8
“I’M ONE OF SIX KIDS. ONE

“AS I WAS
13 “I have three
TIME , I HAD A GIRL OVER AT dogs, and I secretly
MY PARENTS’ HOUSE , AND don’t like any of

CHECKING OUT
them. I want a cat.”
THE DOOR WASN’ T LOCKED.
—ELAINE H., 22
MY BROTHER CAME IN

A GUY, I MISSED WHILE WE WERE HOOKING


UP, AND I QUICKLY HAD HER
14 “Sometimes at
work, I call down

A CRACK IN PRETEND WE WERE ASLEEP.


IT WAS SO AWK WARD — SHE
to IT and pretend my
computer is broken

THE SIDEWALK
just to flirt with
WAS LYING ON TOP OF ME the cute tech guys.”
WHILE HE RUMMAGED
M A R I E AVG E R O P O U L O S: G E T T Y I M AG E S . S TO R I E S M AY H AV E B E E N

—KELLY G., 21

AND FELL. ALL AROUND FOR HIS CLOTHES.”

—COBY L., 19, STUDENT, HARRISON, NY


15 “The last night

THESE PEOPLE
of college, I slept
with this guy, and
10 C E L E B C O N F E S S I O N
E D I T E D F O R L E N G T H , C O N T E N T, A N D C L A R I T Y.

afterward, we

RUSHED TO “I was in an airport taxi line. This man


comes up to me and says, ‘Ma’am, would
couldn’t find the
condom. When I got

HELP, BUT HE
home the next day,
you like a ride in a town car?’ And I’m like, my mom offered
‘Perfect! Thanks.’ Then a cop rolls up and to do my laundry.

DIDN’T. LAME.”
An hour later, she
cuffs the man. The cop’s like, ‘We’re trying
told me she’d found
to put a stop to this. He would’ve charged you $500.’ I a condom in my
—ASHLEY E., 28, ASSISTANT STYLIST, felt responsible for getting him arrested. I was beet red, sheets. She looked
BROOKLYN, NY and I couldn’t wait to leave because I was like, everybody like she had seen a
probably thinks I’m a criminal or an undercover ghost. Ugh.”
cop setting this guy up.” —MARIE AVGEROPOULOS, THE 100, THE CW —KIMBERLY C., 26

DON’T MISS NEXT MONTH’S


CONFESSIONS, ON SALE NOVEMBER 10
65
C ON F E S S I ON S

Worst Dates Ever


“Our date was going so well that I literally
thought he could be the one. Then as he was
“We were out dancing at a club, driving me home, we stopped in front of his
and my date got upset because house. He turned to me and said, ‘I’m actually
married and looking for a threesome —want to
she thought I was dancing with tell my wife you’ll be joining us tonight?’”
“He invited me to
a movie but
other people too much and BECCA M., 20 neglected to
ignoring her. She left, and when mention that he
was the projec-
I got home, she was sitting on tion guy. I wasn’t
my doorstep. Stalker!” allowed in the
ANNA V., 25
projection room,
so I had to watch
the two-and-a-
half-hour movie
by myself.”
MANDY R., 36
“He spent 15
minutes telling
me about his
ex’s boob job.
Enough said.”
KAITLIN H., 23

“During our first date, he


aggressively tried to get me to
go home with him. I refused. As
I was walking away, he yelled,
‘What are you…a lesbian?’”
NICOLE W., 26

“He asked me if
he could finger
me to ‘concen-
trate better’ on
the movie we “When the bill came,
were watching. he took out a bag
I went to the bath- of coins, like for
room and never a Coinstar machine.
came back.” I paid the whole
ERINN T., 21
tab because I felt
bad about leaving
JAMIE CHUNG/ TRUNK ARCHIVE

all that change.”


ALI F., 23

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71
THE RED-HOT RAPPER (AND ARIANA
GRANDE’S EX) TALKS A BIG GAME, BUT HE’S
REALLY A LOVE-AND-LET-LIVE KIND OF GUY.
THE EX FACTOR “I don’t have
the time or energy to hate
anybody. I’ve learned that
the best way to move on is
to be 100 with yourself.
You’ve got to boss up, shake
it off, and keep moving.”

GET MINE, GET YOURS “I


think it’s crazy that a lot
of women haven’t had
orgasms. It’s terrible! I
want her to look forward
to it as much as I do.”

BOY, INTERRUPTED “My first


time, I didn’t know what I
was doing. My mom came
home, so I had to stop
and sneak my girlfriend
out. My mom never knew.
But she will now!”

SAY IT LOUD “The thing


about sex is you’ve got to
be vocal, even if it’s
awkward. You don’t want
to be the guy who thinks
he’s doing it right when
he’s really messing it up.”
—RACHEL MOSELY

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FUR BABY’S
TAKEN!

FEARLESS Lena Dunham and FEARLESS San Francisco FEARLESS Norway’s slow-TV
Whitney Cummings Insta- installs new city walls with craze spreads: BBC to add to
gram pups who need homes; pee-repellent paint. Public its “unhurried programming”
give us the warm and fuzzies. leakers: ur-ine trouble! with a real-time sleigh ride.

WASTING
CANDY
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A CRIME.

FAIL Sounds shady: Fears FAIL When taking a whiz FAIL Giving sweet cheeks
of black pets being aggres- turns deadly: Too much an even grosser meaning:
sive and/or cursed means urine causes a lamppost slo-mo vid “Hot Girl Shot in
they’re adopted less. collapse in San Fran. the Butt With Gummy Bears.”

78 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


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H A I R C A R E S Y S T E M**
#REALTALK SIX MONTHS AGO, Nina were) or how unfair it As a result of this
Dobrev revealed that is that people can insult discovery, I decided to
she was leaving The others under the shift the way I looked

Are
Vampire Diaries. The disguise of anonymity at the world—to eye
shock, tears, and rage (it is) or how social everyone (even the
among fans were media has become a most vicious haters)
understandable and violent minefield (it through a prism of

You
expected. But what I has). Rather, the point compassion, kindness,
never saw coming was is that I learned and understanding. Is
the anger directed at something about the “loser in the
me. I was the enemy… myself as I was being basement” just angry

Riding
the devil. I had taken bullied: I can also be a because she has no one
something very special Mean Girl. to talk to about how
from them, and they I realized that I get alienated and bored
wanted me punished. pleasure when I’m told she is in this frustrating

the
Suddenly, I found “don’t listen to the hat- world? Am I just
myself on the receiving ers, they’re losers in jealous that the girl in
end of a social-media their moms’ base- the too-tight dress isn’t
hate campaign. ments.” I imagine these afraid to show off her

Hate
“You’re fat.” “No one “losers” and feel better curvy body when I feel
will ever love you.” about myself. Their like I’m not attractive
They renamed me insults hurt less if I unless I hide mine?
Julie “Plague” and label them “pathetic.” Daily, I visualize

Train?
pasted my head onto I diminish their value the smart-ass troll who
the body of the Hulk, in order to protect lives deep in my
tweeting what a mine. I noticed that I’m subconscious, and I
disgusting creature quick to make a joke at pelt him with rainbows
I must be. I was someone else’s expense. and unicorns. I fight a
WHEN THE VAMPIRE DIARIES sickened and stunned. I want them to laugh. battle against my
CO-CREATOR AND EXECUTIVE PRODUCER This character I’d Share in the private judgmental thoughts.
JULIE PLEC FOUND HERSELF UNDER helped create and joke. If I win their And when an
ATTACK ONLINE, SHE RECONSIDERED shaped to be adored approval, my self- opportunity arises to
was being used against esteem grows. I judge gain acceptance or
HER BATTLE PLAN IRL. me as proof of why I girls in supertight, popularity at the
should “DIE, BITCH.” short dresses and four- expense of someone
The point of this is inch platform heels. I else, I zip it. It’s not
not to say how my find myself irritated by easy. Hollywood,
feelings were hurt (they hipsters with Jesus Twitter, our friends—
beards and people who they all contribute to a
can’t spell. I overflow community of snark.
with both silent and The more we engage in
expressed judgment, the way that everyone
which means I am just else engages, the more
as capable of being followers, Likes, and
cruel as those I rage RTs we get. But we
against are. can’t rail against the
cyberbullies without
acknowledging what
we also contribute to a
culture of cruelty. As
you live your life and
accumulate friends,
both IRL and on social
media, ask yourself:
LOOKS LIKE
SOMEBODY’S HAVING Are you a bully too? If
A TWIT FIT. so and the urge to
DEBBIE HANFORD/ISTOCK

strike out hits, imagine


something that makes
you smile (punk rock,
Popsicles, glitter
bombs), and let the
snark stop there. ■

80 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


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STYLE
EDITED BY
K AT I E L . C O N N O R
& S A R A H C O N LY

Follow model,
host, and dancer
Damaris Lewis
on Insta
@DamarisLewis.
COAT, Canada
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Bundle
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FA SHION EDI TOR: A DA M M A NSURO G LU 85
1

STYLE
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2. LAMARQUE,
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3. MICHAEL MICHAEL
3 KORS, available at
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4. DIESEL, $448,
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86
STYLE
3

pastel
CONSIDER A SE A-FOAM
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1. LINE + DOT,
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2. KYE, Felt Chicago
3. CALVIN KLEIN,
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4. DAWN LEVY 2,
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JACKET, Paige, $698, bloomingdales VEST, Thakoon for DesigNation, TOP, Lisette L Montreal, $83, lisettel
.com. PANTS, Marc by Marc Jacobs, $120, kohls.com. JEANS, Miss Me, .com. SKIRT, American Apparel, DRESS, The JetSet Diaries, $169,
$548, Nordstrom. SHOES, $99.50, dillards.com. $56, americanapparel.net. SHIRT, thejetsetdiaries.com. BELT, Bebe, $69,
Etienne Aigner, $475, etienneaigner SHOES, Aldo, $100, aldoshoes.com. Hollister Co., $39.95, similar styles bebe.com. SHOES, Lulu*s, $30,
.com. CLUTCH, Kate Spade New York, BAG, Zara, $49.90, Zara available at hollisterco.com. SHOES, lulus.com. CLUTCH, Marciano, $128,
$228, katespade.com GX by Gwen Stefani, $129.95, marciano.com
Nordstrom. EARRINGS, Michael Kors,
$125, michaelkors.com
94 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015
ITÕS THE STOPS
THAT
AT
AT INSPIRE
US TO GO.

toyota.com/camry
Prototype shown with options. Production model will vary. ©
©2015
2015 Toy
Toyota
T
To
oyota Motor
Motor Sales,
Sales, U
Sales U.S.A.,
.S.A
.A.., In
Inc.
Inc
c.
STYLE

FROM TOP: VINCE CAMUTO,


$198, Nordstrom. MILLY,
$365, amazon.com/
fashion. KATE SPADE NEW
YORK, $298, Macy’s

Handle
It!
Taylor Swift never leaves
home without one
on her arm. Structured
top-handled carryalls
scream “boss lady” from
boardroom to brunch.

PHOTO G R A PHED BY JA MIE CHUNG


96 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015 SENIOR AC CE S SORIE S EDI TOR: K AT H Y L E E
ÒONLY IN THE EYES OF LOVE
YOU CAN FIND INFINITY.Ó
SORIN CERIN, PHILOSOPHER
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REVLON COLORSTAY ª
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GET LAIS OLIVEIRAÕS LOOK AT REVLON.COM


STYLE BEANIE,
American
Eagle
Outfitters,
$24.95,
ae.com
BOOTS,
ShoeDazzle,
$39.95,
shoedazzle
.com

FUN, FEARLESS FINDS

UNDER $50
Go ahead and give in to the urge to update
your fall wardrobe with a key piece (or 10!)
that won’t blow your budget.

WATCH, Nine VEST, Decree,


West, $49, $39.99,
amazon jcpenney.com
SWEATER, .com
Forever 21, TURTLENECK,
$29.80, XOXO,
forever21 $49, Macy’s
.com

S T U A R T T Y S O N / S T U D I O D . S T Y L I S T: S A B R I N A G R A N D E . V I N C E N Z O G R I L L O / I M A X T R E E . C O M .
PONCHO,
American
Eagle
Outfitters,
$39.95,
ae.com

CREDIT
Audacious
Lipsticks,

each, ttkt
ktkt tktk
JEANS,
GoJane,
$39, SKIRT,
gojane Forever
.com 21,
$29.80,
forever21
.com
BAG, Lulu*s,
$41, lulus
.com

100 WIN THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS TOO MANY JEANS. FOR THE CHANCE TO WIN
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Using the Silk Express Collection
from ItÕs a 10 Haircare

1 2 3 4
STEP 1 MIRACLE SILK SHAMPOO
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STEP 2 MIRACLE SILK HAIR MASK


With help from the collectionÕs
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5 6
For vibrant and voluminous hair,
apply after mask all over hair
then rinse thoroughly.

STEP 4 MIRACLE SILK SMOOTHING BALM


Detangle and lock in that silky
look by applying this balm to wet
hair after conditioning.

STEP 5 MIRACLE SILK LEAVE-IN


For the ultimate frizz-free, voluminous
look, nourish your hair with this
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INTENSIVE HAND CREAM
For equally smooth and silky skin,
massage this soothing cream into
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To watch behind-the-scenes footage of


how to create this look and more, visit
Itsa10Haircare.com
STYLE JACKET, Armani
Exchange, $500,
armaniexchange
.com. TURTLENECK,
H&M, $49.99,
hm.com. SKIRT,
Forever 21,
$27.90,
forever21.com

Q
WHAT IS AN EXAMPLE OF SOMETHING
I COULD WEAR TO MY BOYFRIEND’S
DAD’S BIRTHDAY TO LOOK RESPECTFUL
WHILE ALSO IMPRESSING MY MAN?
—KARA O’CONNOR, 21

A / Dear Respectful But Impressive, there


are three choices for this dual-needs
situation. First, a killer dress that looks
effortless and fits your body perfectly in an
eye-catching print. If you feel like a dress
is too prissy and fancy, try a jumpsuit with
heels. Finally, I love a skinny (p)leather

ASK
legging with an untucked silk blouse and a
blazer, which is anything but stuffy.

STACYStyle expert and star


SHOES,
of TLC’s Love, Lust, or Run
Sperry, Stacy London takes on
$165, all your #FashionProblems.
sperry
.com

B FA N YC .C O M; V I C TO R I A A DA M S O N / B L AU B L U T- E D I T I O N .C O M; C H R I S TO P H E R P E T E R S O N / B U Z Z FOTO/ F I L M M AG I C .
Q / How do I transition

A L L S T I L L S : S T U A R T T Y S O N / S T U D I O D . S T Y L I S T: S A B R I N A G R A N D E . C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P : B I L LY FA R R E L L /
my go-to leggings-
and-riding-boots
Q / I am obsessed look from leisure into
with lace and love a work outfit? I hate
wearing it in the not being able to
summer, but how do wear it in a corporate
I incorporate it into setting.
—ELLE CANTALANO, 21
my wardrobe with the
colder fall temps? A / Dear Horse and
—BRITTANY HENNING, 23 Hound Reader, skinny
leggings with riding
A / Dear Lace Lover, boots and a well-fitted
typically, “summer” jacket aren’t exactly
fabrics like lace are easy out of bounds at the
to transition to fall by office, but you don’t
layering. A gorgeous want to look like you just
white lace skirt looks dismounted a horse. The
great with a short pieces work separately
leather jacket, fitted OLIVIA but together might look DRESS, Lands’ End, $79,
turtleneck, ribbed wool PALERMO too literal. Avoid leggings landsend.com. SHOES,
tights, and ankle boots. with the thigh-chafing Sam Edelman, $99.95,
Mix heavy and light suede patches, and try nordstrom.com
fabrics to get more use a heel or men’s brogue
and value out of those for a modern twist.
lovely summer pieces
SHOES, The Frye
year-round.
Company,
$248, thefrye
company.com

104 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


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EDITED BY
L E A H W YA R

The
Future Is
Now
BEAUTY FORMULAS
CHANGE FASTER
THAN YOU CAN SAY
“CUTTING-EDGE
SKIN SMOOTHER!”
HERE, THE CURRENT
CROP OF
BREAKTHROUGHS
PLUS PRO
PREDICTIONS ON
WHAT’S NEW
AND NEXT.
FIRST UP: NAILS.
BY L AUREN BAL SAMO
THOMAS L AGRANGE

107
NAILS
FUN, FEARLESS, FUTURE Gel Polish
1
True gels (pro or DIY
formulas) last about three
weeks and require no dry
time, as each layer (top,
color, and base coat) is
cured to a hard finish via
a UV or LED light.

3
GAME CHANGER: Red
Carpet Manicure’s gel
polish cures to a perfect
finish in only one coat
(no base or top required)
with an LED lamp
Next-Gen in 45 seconds.
1 RED CARPET READY One-

Gels Step Polish in Break a Leg,


$13 (LED lamp, $49),
ulta.com

2 Gel Hybrid
These systems deliver
high-shine color that lasts
about a week—no curing
necessary. The secret:
photo-initiators that react
to natural light, bonding
4 color and shine. A true
hybrid’s top coat comes in
an opaque (usually black)
5 bottle—bottom too—to
keep out light, which
would harden it.
2 SALLY HANSEN Miracle Gel
Top Coat, $10, drugstores
3 SALLY HANSEN Miracle Gel
(shown here in Flash-
ionista, while supplies
last), $10, drugstores
4 OPI Infinite Shine Gel
Effects Top Coat Lacquer
$12.50, Ulta
5 OPI Infinite Shine Gel
Effects Lacquer in Wild
Blue Yonder, $12.50, Ulta
3

6
Gel Effect
Lacquer
ALL STILLS: JEFFREY WESTBROOK /STUDIO D

Think of these as
suped-up nail polishes
and top coats. They
mimic the thickness
and high-shine of a
gel mani but lack the
extra longevity.
6 ESSIE Gel Setter, $10,
essie.com
7 NAILS INC Gel Effect Polish
in Hyde Park Court, $15, 7
nailsinc.com

108 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


NO LIGHT NEEDED
AT THIS CELEBRATION!

Pink Tank Cr•me de la Cr•me Redgy Shock Wave Pretty Piggy Dig Fig
NAILS
FUN, FEARLESS, FUTURE

Tinted FUTURE

Base Coat FORECAST


WITH…
A must for rocking the barely
there nude polish trend: 8 Julie Kandalec, a staple at
these multicolored primers,
NYFW and creative director of
which neutralize nail
discoloration. Find a perfect
NYC’s Paintbox Nail Salon
match for your nail beds Q Let’s talk about nail
with Zoya’s (right). Even art—where do you see
cooler: Deborah Lippmann’s it going?
(below) uses sheer violet A During my recent trip
pigments to cancel out to mani-mecca Seoul,
yellow hues.
I got a glimpse, and it’s
8 ZOYA Naked Manicure all about chic, fuss-free
Perfectors in Mauve, Pink,
Buff, and Nude, $9 each, looks. My favorites:
zoya.com linear graphics,
9 DEBORAH LIPPMANN Genie in a tone-on-tone manis
Bottle, $20, sephora.com (painting a different
shade of the same color
family on each nail),
and wearing two dif-
ferent (but comple-
mentary) polish shades
INSTANT INSPO on each hand.
Get your daily
dose of mani porn Q What’s next for
by following… nail color?
A We’re definitely shift-
ing away from chunky
glitters and more
toward high-sheen
opalescent finishes,
like crushed pearl and
cellophane.
@PaintboxNails Q Any groundbreaking
for the season’s treatments we all need
most coveted and curated to try?
nail-art designs. A IBX. It’s a two-step
pre-mani treatment
(about $15) that heals
weak nails. The first
step fuses keratin into
the upper layers of the
nail via heat from an
I N S TAG R A M S C O U R T E SY S U B J EC T S; C O U R T E SY J U L I E K A N DA L EC .

LED light. The second


@NaomiNailsNYC
for OTT celeb nail art is a spot treatment to
(she tricks out fix white marks,
Madonna’s nails!). ridges, and peeling.
Q If you could invent
any nail product, what
would it be?
A A full-coverage nail
form to create per-
fectly sculpted nails in
seconds. It would eas-
@JinSoonChoi ily mold into trendy
for her original shapes like the stiletto
Fashion Week looks
or the square-tip, and
in real time. 9 you could pop it right
into place.

110 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


Nail the look with Terra-Coppa,
Per-Suede and Cream of the Crop Download the free
ManiMatchª app to virtually
try on any shade live
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TM

el!
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SKIN
FUN, FEARLESS, FUTURE

The Future Is Now

Skin
JULIA NONA/TRUNK ARCHIVE

FROM CREAMS THAT CONTOUR TO THE KOREAN SKIN-VASION,


HERE ARE THE BEST WAYS TO PERFECT YOUR COMPLEXION.
BY DE ANNA PAI

112
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YOU DON’T LOOK AMAZING “FOR YOUR AGE ”


YOU LOOK AMAZING PERIOD

OLAY IS PROUD TO FETE YEARS OF COSMO A TRULY AGELESS TITLE


HERE’S TO MAKING YOUR OWN RULES FLAUNTING WITHOUT FEAR
AND ALWAYS KEEPING THEM GUESSING CONGRATULATIONS TO YOU
AND TO EVERY WOMAN WHO COUNTS HER ACCOMPLISHMENTS—
NOT HER CANDLES—ON HER BIRTHDAY

CHEERS TO COSMO FOR


YEARS OF FEARLESSNESS!
SKIN
FUN, FEARLESS, FUTURE

1 FUTURE
FORECAST

Introducing: WITH…

Pre Serum
Ni’Kita Wilson, cosmetic
Just as a dry sponge is
chemist and formulator of
pretty much useless
more than 3,500 products
until you dampen it, skin
better absorbs products Q What’s the next big
if you first prime it. skin-care trend?
Moisturizing toner works, Moringa seed extract A Antipollution prod-
but if you’re already a in DIOR One Essential
ucts. With new studies
fan of Elizabeth Arden, City Defense Toxin
consider their newbie Shield ($59, linking pollution to
(right). Clinical studies dior.com) protects inflammation, acne,
found up to five times the from pollution. and wrinkles, more
collagen production when brands are paying
used before the line’s attention to it. The
Ceramide and Prevage
issue is particulate
serums.
matter (PM)—micro-
1 ELIZABETH ARDEN
Superstart Skin Renewal
scopic carbon particles
Booster, $65, from soot and traffic
elizabetharden.com exhaust. PM can sink
Night deep into skin’s dermal
Cream 2.0 layer, unleashing col-
Inspired by Asian sleep lagen-damaging free
packs (intense overnight radicals. And it doesn’t
face masks), this just affect city girls. Air
treatment combats the quality in rural areas
dry, dull, crinkly skin
has also declined.
synonymous with late
2 nights. The lightweight Wind moves, so pollu-
gel-in-oil formula offers tion does too.
tons of hydration and
Q How can we fix it?
healing without
greasiness. A We’re focusing on
reversing free-radical
2 LANCÔME Visionnaire
Nuit Beauty Sleep damage. New ingredi-
Perfector, $88, lancome- ents will go beyond
usa.com traditional antioxi-
dants like vitamins A
and E—which only
neutralize oxygen-
Purity Meets based free radicals
Potency (caused primarily by
UV exposure) and not
In natural news, Echinacea
GreenEnvy (a super-
pollution’s nitrogen-
powered strain of the herb) based free radicals.
in Farmacy’s serum Q If you could invent any-
(below) protects collagen
and fades spots, while
thing, what would it be?
Grown Alchemist’s botani- A A 3-D printer that
cal antioxidant serum 4 can scan an image of
(here) neutralizes three your face from when
types of free radicals (most you were young, then
counteract only one). 3 feed that info into a
C O U R T E SY N I’ K I TA W I L S O N

3 FARMACY Invincible Root machine to produce


Cell Anti-Aging Serum, laserlike injections,
$65, qvc.com
restoring collagen, fat,
4 GROWN ALCHEMIST Detox and proteins, all in a
Serum Antioxidant+3
Complex, $55, customized way that
grownalchemist.com looks natural.

114
©2015 P&G

Micro-Sculpting Cream, formulated with


Hyaluronic Acid, Amino-Peptides and
Vitamin B3, hydrates to li , plump and
firm your skin.

OLAY REGENERIST MICRO-SCULPTING CREAM


The #1 Anti-Aging Facial Moisturizer*

*52 week unit sales through week ending 5/30/15 US xAOC


SKIN
FUN, FEARLESS, FUTURE
5

RETHINK THE SPA…


Eastern …with these innovative
Imports ways to relax.
(Bonus: They save time
Korea is the go-to spot for
and money!)
skin-care inspiration state-
side. Now with Sephora Zeel and The Ritualist
stocking Korean brands (prices vary)
(such as Belif and Tony Uber-like apps (Zeel, in six
Moly) and new Korea- states; The Ritualist in NYC)
specific e-tailers (like Peach bring the spa—massages,
and Lily and Glow Recipe), facials, plus equipment and
access has never been products—to your home or
easier. The coolest finds: hotel in a few swipes.
6
ESSENCES Skin Laundry
These tonerlike liquids go ($65 and up)
on post-cleanse, priming This spa (currently in L.A., NYC,
skin so it better absorbs and Scottsdale, Arizona) offers
serums and moisturizers. one service: a 10-minute,
5 MIZON Mela Defense laser-and-light facial, which
White Capsule Essence, cleans skin and stimulates
$34, peachandlily.com collagen. Book one on
SkinLaundry.com.
WATERY LOTIONS
Packed with moisture- The Peel Bar
magnet actives, these ultra- ($50)
light moisturizers hydrate as Created by NYC derm Neal
well as heavy creams do. 7 Schultz, MD, The Peel Bar (go
6 BELIF The True Cream to BeautyRX.com for NYC
Aqua Bomb, 9 locations) offers his signature
$38, sephora.com glycolic-acid peel with an
aesthetician for a quarter of
MODELING MASKS
its usual cost.
Mix with H2O and the
algae-rich powder dries to
a rubbery texture, so ingre-
dients can’t evaporate.
7 LINDSAY Lavender
Modeling Rubber Mask,
$6, glowrecipe.com

8 Contour
With Lotion
Put down the bronzer—
Kendall-worthy angles
are possible...from a
bottle! The latest creams
form an invisible film over
skin’s surface, pulling it
taut and lifting it in the
direction you apply it.
The effect disappears
once you cleanse, but
these sculptors also
ALL STILLS: JEFFREY WESTBROOK /STUDIO D

stimulate the production


of collagen and elastin,
firming skin over time.
8 ESTÉE LAUDER New
Dimension Expert Liquid
10 Tape, $70, esteelauder.com
9 CLINIQUE Sculptwear Lift
and Contour Serum,
$29.50, Bloomingdale’s
10 OLAY Regenerist Micro-
Sculpting Serum, $26,
drugstores

116
MAKEUP
FUN, FEARLESS, FUTURE

The Future Is Now

Makeup
PA SCAL DEMEE STER

WHEN IT COMES TO COSMETICS, THE MANDATE IS FASTER,


LIGHTER, AND (ALWAYS) SEXIER.
BY JE S SICA MATLIN

118
Age defying
comes to lip care.
Introducing
NEW

100% Natural

Argan Oil

Omegas 6 + 9

Clinically proven to
provide healthier, more
youthful looking lips

©2015 Pfzer, Inc.


MAKEUP
FUN, FEARLESS, FUTURE
1

Flawless
Foundation
Virtually weightless—so
ideal for foundation-
phobes—serum bases
blur imperfections in a
second-skin kind of way.
And true to their name, BEST NEW
they’re spiked with TIME SUCKS
complexion-perfecting Charge up that phone!
ingredients, improving These apps are perfect
your skin’s surface with 2 for finding your next look
every wear. or fave new product.
1 PERRICONE MD No YouCam Makeup
Foundation Foundation Look into your phone’s cam, and
Serum, $55, sephora.com choose anything from faux
2 DIOR Diorskin Nude Air lashes to a full-on look. Within
Serum Foundation, $53, 3 seconds, it’s superimposed onto
dior.com your face, moving with yours as
3 RIMMEL LONDON Lasting you speak, smize, and selfie.
Finish 25 Hour Founda­ ShadeScout
tion, $8, drugstores Craving Tay-Tay’s lip color
du jour or a shadow to match
your shoes? Point your phone’s
camera at anything to get an
exact product match from this
4 shoppable database.

Move Over,
Red Lips
When it comes to
a power mouth, the bar
has been raised.
Eggplant, midnight
blue, even emerald green
give serious bad-bitch
5 vibes while remaining
chic. The key: precision.
(If you have a lip brush,
use it.) A glowing
complexion keeps it
from going too goth.
4 MAKE UP FOR EVER Artist
Plexigloss in 502P, $19,
makeupforever.com
5 YSL Gloss Volupte in 209,
$34, yslbeautyus.com
AIRGASM
ALL STILLS: JEFFREY WESTBROOK /STUDIO D

No retoucher, no problem! 6 MAC Lipmix in Blue, $15,


maccosmetics.com
This cordless gun
gives you a Photoshop-like 7 TOM FORD Lips and Boys in
finish with one click. Liam, $35, tomford.com
TEMPTU Air,
$195,
temptu.com
7

120
©2015 Church & Dwight Co., Inc.

Thank you for half a century of inspiring women to be


their most fabulous selves. We look forward to joining
you in another 50 years of uncompromising beauty.
BATISTEª DRY SHAMPOO. REFRESH IT. STYLE IT. LOVE IT.
MAKEUP
FUN, FEARLESS, FUTURE
8 FUTURE
FORECAST
So Cush WITH…

Originating in Korea (the


Wonka Factory of the
Lisa Eldridge, Lancôme’s
beauty world), cushion global makeup creative director
technology allows watery and YouTube phenom (not to
formulas, like foundations mention one of this year’s Fun,
or lip stains, to be Fearless 50, p. 162)
suspended in a sponge
then packaged into a spill- Q Where is the major inno-
proof applicator. The
vation happening in the
cosmetics world?
sheer, luminous color is
sophisticated, but using A Foundation. It used
these things? Crazy fun. to be so heavy—now
8 LANCÔME Miracle Cushion it’s light and blend-
9
Liquid Cushion Compact, able. I’m working on
$47, lancome-usa.com products inspired by
9 PERIPERA Ah Much Real Korean trends. There,
My Cushion Blusher in the ideal complexion
Shy Pink, $16, is described as a
urbanoutfitters.com
“peeled eggshell.” It
sounds weird, but it
means dewy and
10 translucent.
Q Are there any looks
you’re over?
A No, it’s all about per-
Trend to Try: sonal taste. If some-
Strobing body is wearing red
Confused by contouring? lipstick and false eye-
Grab a neutral highlighter
lashes and they’re
(like Topshop’s), blend it
along your cheekbones, owning it, I say, “Don’t
and bam—instant angles! let anybody take that
It’s called strobing (and away from you.” Why
yes, we’re obsessed with copy anyone else?
the name too).
Q Besides working with
10 TOPSHOP Beauty Glow, A-listers like Kim Kardashian
$16, topshop.com West and Emma Watson,
you have millions of views
on YouTube. What do you
love about the medium?
A It’s not only taught
women who were
already into makeup
how to expertly apply it,
but now women who
Simply Smoky 11 never wore any are
With their crayonlike
obsessed with it!
shape, buttery texture,
and intense pigment level, Q What do you think our
Kajal (aka kohl) liners—an makeup bags will look like
import from India—make in the future?
sexy, sooty eyes a cinch. A I think in 20 years,
Just swipe (lash lines
makeup will be fool-
too—they’re so creamy
and gentle) and smudge. proof. Expect lipstick
that doesn’t move but
N I C K H A R V E Y/ W I R E I M AG E

11 LAURA MERCIER Kajal remains moisturizing.


D’Orient Eye Liner, $28,
lauramercier.com A foundation that con-
ceals every pore. Liner
12 MAYBELLINE NEW YORK
Master Kajal Eyeliner in that gives you a per-
Navy Night, $8, 12 fect flick every time.
drugstores It’s only getting better.

122
The Future Is Now

Hair
YOUR MANE FORECAST: TRULY DRY SHAMPOO, LIGHTNING-
FAST BLOWOUTS, AND A CURE FOR SPLIT ENDS.
BY LONI VENTI
HAIR
FUN, FEARLESS, FUTURE

Dry Clean
Only (Really)
1 Instead of loading up hair
with powder and perfume,
Grow Long! the latest dry shampoo
Split ends can roadblock leaves strands looking and
your lengthy-hair feeling freshly washed. In
dreams—exactly why 30 seconds, cleansing
you need this newbie. It particles soak up oil and
wraps hair in lipids, sweat, then get brushed
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HAIR
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128
BEAUTY fact that I probably looked
better than ever.
Even in Portland, I kept

Pretty in
up my routine. I was the new
girl, so naturally, I wanted to
look good. I went on two first
dates with two different laid-

Another City
back guys—neither of whom
called me again—and that’s
when the girls in my book
club broke it to me. “You look
too high-maintenance for dat-
ing here,” one said, “like you’d
Sarah Wexler moved cross-country looking for a be afraid to smudge your lip-
change, but one thing was holding her back: her look. stick.” I wrote it off. Then,
when after a few dates, a new
guy invited me on a group
NEW ZIP CODE, camping trip, I panicked.
NEW MAKEUP He assured me I would
BAG?
have my own tent, but that
wasn’t my holdup. Instead, I
thought about that moment
he’d see me with my dark
under-eye circles and natu-
rally frizzy hair. That’s when
it hit me: The years I’d spent
doing my face and hair
hadn’t made me more confi-
dent, they’d made me less.
So disgusted at my own
lack of confidence, I forced
myself to go camping with
barely a stitch of makeup.
None of the other girls wore
any. On the trip, one of the
girls complimented my eye
color; another liked my
freckles. The guy and a dozen
“I started to of his friends saw who I really
feel incredibly
am, and I survived. Splash-
ugly, despite the
fact that I ing around in the lake with
THREE YEARS AGO, as an over- not a blowout in probably looked a chance of my dog, the sun on my bare
worked editor, I left my life sight. In New York, better than finding some- face, I actually felt pretty. So
in New York City for Port- I had spent years ever.” one who would I decided to challenge myself
land, Oregon, in hopes of a Instagramming my choose me. not to wear makeup when
slower pace and easy access meticulous nail art, spray My beauty rou- I got back to town. I met
to mountains, rivers, and tanning, and getting lash tine never felt crazy friends for brunch right after
trees. Days after I touched extensions and three-hour or over-the-top to me the gym, my only adornment
down, I joined a gym and keratin treatments. Part of because I knew women a natural flush. I pared down
felt at home around the fit this was because I was living doing even more, like a my first-date look to con-
women in cute Nike leg- among so many glamorous 29-year-old coworker who cealer and mascara and met
gings. But in the locker women. Being obsessed with got Botox. The more I did, a man who I felt knew the
room, I was startled to notice fixing my physical flaws was the more I felt I needed real me from the first night,
that so many of these women also a personal hang-up after to do. I spent a lot of time who tells me I look better
were sporting bushes to rival the man I loved dumped me thinking about laser treat- without all the hoopla. I still
those in Portland’s Forest for a pretty intern where we ments—for cellulite, for think I look prettier with full
MARIJA SAVIC/STOCKSY

Park—a far cry from Man- worked. Back in the dat- that first wrinkle settling in hair and makeup, but now I
hattan, where many women ing pool, I figured that if I between my eyebrows, for don’t feel like a troll without
are as waxed as porn stars. was going to compete with removing hair. Anything it. Although to a stranger, I
They also looked different literally millions of beauti- you could shoot a laser at, probably look less pretty in
outside the locker room— ful single women, I had to I wanted. I started to feel my Portland life, I feel pret-
less makeup, bare nails, and look my best or I didn’t stand incredibly ugly, despite the tier than I ever did before. ■

130 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


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BEAUTY

What little girl


in our culture is
not fascinated by
blondeness?
Certainly, that
was the case when
I was a child.
I hope that things
have changed
with a wider “WHY I WENT
BLONDE”
By Naomi Wolf
definition of Author of the
classic best-seller
The Beauty Myth

what’s “ideal”...
132
...BUT WHEN I WAS 7, it was blondeness
that was the paragon. Flaxen, caramel-y,
honeyed, corn-silk blondeness—even the
names on the hair dye were enchantingly,
threateningly poetic. My friend Debbie
and I, two dark-haired Jewish girls, would
play with the gilt-topped Barbie, with her
perky conical breasts, her vinyl house full
of changes of clothing, her pink convert-
ible. That was the life that blondes led
when I was a child.
The spell broke early. By the time I was
13, I was at ease with being a dark-haired,
intellectual “other. ” My outlier friends
and I rejected to the point of sneering the
blondeness of the cheerleaders—so streaky,
so Sun-In-y—those aspiringly Anglo girls
in our multiethnic high school, who were
selected to represent team spirit yet
reflected the student population not at all.
By then, I knew that blondeness was a
deceptive social marker, a trap. By 15, a
blazing-cross baby feminist, I was comfort-
able with my ethnic nonperfect-ness and
felt compassion for my white-blonde-haired,
conventionally physically ideal best friend,
whose iconic fairness and slenderness made
her the object of so many lecherous older
men’s attentions. It also posed challenges,
from where I watched, to her being as read-
ily received as a novelist-in-training as she

illustration by
Ryan McAmis

MONTH 2015 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ 133


BEAUTY
deserved to be rather than cast as arm I went to Sarah and fell in stylist-
candy. For young women intellectuals, it client love. Sarah is like a Disney mer-

“The ideals
seemed a bit easier to be taken seriously maid but one with giant shears and a
if you were dark-haired. The stereotypes killer attitude. She goes rock climbing,
were not fair, but there they were. Joan and this badass interest does not clash
Didion (blonde) had a tougher time
being seen as a heavyweight thinker of beauty with her having a lovely, complex hair-
style: edgy-razory things on the sides and

are in
than did Susan Sontag (dark, cool gray long locks in the back, shading from
streak). Joan Baez (dark) was treated palest turquoise to a Greek Island aqua.
as being a more important performer I am skeptical to a fault, of course,
than was Joni Mitchell (blonde).
Those oppositions were everywhere. fact much about the beauty industry. But at Seagull,
I felt immediately at home. I caught the

less rigid
In college, I wrote about the endless dual- vibe that however weird I wanted to be,
ism of these types in women’s literature: they would find the beauty in a woman’s
dark-haired, perceptive Lucy Snowe, in expression of her own uniqueness.
Charlotte Brontë’s Villette, versus blonde,
superficial Ginevra Fanshawe. And note than they After explaining the uncomfortable
experiences I’d had with other stylists, I

were when
the Disney heroines: dark-haired Snow heard the magic words. “Let’s just let it
White (duty, housework, domestic do what it wants to do.” The cut she gave
service to seven dwarves) versus blonde me was the slightly erratic, messy one I
Sleeping Beauty (kissing, adoration
from princes, awakening to love). I wrote had wanted my whole adult life without
realizing it. That comfort led me to have
After I wrote my first book, The
Beauty Myth, my critique of rigid ide-
als of beauty, I used to travel around the
The Beauty the courage to ask for highlights. It was
an impulse, but I felt…well, safe enough
to venture there. As Sarah applied
world speaking. Whenever I would
ask the crowd what the Madison Ave- Myth. them, I blurted out what I secretly
wanted: “Let’s go lighter.” She managed
nue “ideal” looked like, they would
chant “Tall, thin, blonde!” The thought
of becoming blonder signified, for me,
Blonder to give me streaks—some were kind of
1930s silent-screen bright gold, and
others were the color of those nice
the shadow of ‘selling out’ to social pres-
sure—and it carried the risk of seeming isn’t better extra-pale golden retrievers. They all
mingled totally, implausibly with
to distance one from one’s ethnicity.
So for many reasons, I never consid- anymore. strands of my own dark hair. I really
loved it.
The next time I went to Sarah, I
It is just
ered playing with blondeness for myself.
That said, five decades is a long time asked to go lighter still. Change can be
to have one hair color. By my 40s, I was a little addictive, and before I knew it,
restless and began low-commitment
experiments. Henna rinses to go redder, another I had become kind of…blonde. And I
began to notice how the rigid code of

thing.”
black temporary colors to go darker. what blonde and other hair colors used
Fun but just a fling. I had those cog- to signify had loosened. It was no longer
nac-y streaks in the ’90s like every dark- overdetermined. I saw, everywhere, Afri-
haired professional woman in New can-American women with white-blonde
York—meh. Stylists, I always felt, had hair and Asian women with purple and
their own conventional ideas for me, pink hair and, while I know this is an
which I resisted. I never was comfort- extremely complicated subject, white
able taking any kind of dramatic step people with dreadlocks. I saw a green-
they might urge upon me because haired Katy Perry and yellow-haired
of my skepticism about the whole scene. NeNe Leakes and Nicki Minaj—and a
Then I found a feminist hair salon. Lady Gaga with hair in every color of the
FIRS T PAGE AND THIS PAGE: GE T T Y IMAGE S (2).

Seagull, in Manhattan, was recom- rainbow. Everyone looked fabulous.


mended to me by a millennial friend There is a woman who has come
with one of those cool haircuts that sug- onto my Facebook page for years and,
gest that you know how to code (she no matter what color hair I had,
does). She explained that Seagull is expressed bitter disappointment with
co-owned by a Riot Grrrl…one of the me as a feminist because I colored my
iconic 1990s early Third Wave groups of hair. To her, that was a betrayal. But I
pissed-off young women who embraced BEFORE have spent 25 years correcting the
a revamped, livelier version of feminism reductive assumption that writing a cri-
just when the culture had said the tique of the beauty industry means
movement was over and done. being against adornment, physical plea-

134 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


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BEAUTY AFTER

sure, or display. I never objected to


adornment. What I objected to was lack
of choice. I feel that, compared with
1991 when my book was published, we
are in some ways in a golden age around
certain choices involving fashion and
the body. I didn’t want a world in which
I am forced into my reader’s vision of
the “right” gray hair any more than I
want to live with other rigid ideals.
The ideals of beauty are in fact
much less rigid than they were when I
wrote The Beauty Myth. Blonder isn’t
better anymore. It is just another thing.
I was alarmed, as a child, by the
Clairol advertising slogan “Blondes have
more fun.” I remember asking my
mother why that was. It seemed a
bizarre statement. How on earth would
your hair color affect the fun you were
having? I remember her struggling to
explain what the slogan meant without
messing with my tiny dark head.
I must confess there are real changes
in how my life unfolds post–going
lighter. People who don’t know me think
I’m much nicer…and, um, not as smart.
It’s a cliché, okay, but I’m finding it to THE WRITER
be true. I don’t think I especially glow- WITH HER NEW,
BLONDER LOOK.
ered on the street as a brunette. I hope
I was polite, perhaps even pleasant, to
strangers. But now as a kind-of-blonde,
there is a six-fold increase in the num- cover-up of sexual harassment and their weekend plans to barbecue with
ber of people—especially baffled tourists assault at Yale—is blonde. the kids. And I didn’t know what
of all kinds—who stop me on the street With all these “power blondes” in the “mansplaining” meant firsthand until I
asking for directions. mix, the little girls of today may grow went lighter. People really like elabo-
Is it because people assume that up with very different associations with rately showing things to blonder
blondes have nicer things happen to these images—or better, no stereotypes women, in painfully slow and minute
them, so they assume I will be turning around hair color or complexion at all. detail, as if we have just come off our
pleasantly from contemplating a gin and own desert island where nothing what-
tonic in a hammock to smile sympathet- PERHAPS THE SHIFT IS NOT ABOUT soever has ever worked.
ically at them and say, “Sixth Avenue is blondeness but about lack of familiar- I wish I could mix and match the
Avenue of the Americas. It’s so confus- ity. Maybe people just don’t recognize reactions. I would like to be reassuringly
blonde when needed but aggressively PHOTOGRAPHED BY ELIZABETH GRIFFIN. HAIR: CASEY GEREN USING ORIBE
ing, haha!” Rather than snap, “Get out of me as that cranky dark-haired femi- F O R A B T P. C O M . M A K E U P : M A R N I B U R T O N U S I N G M A K E U P F O R E V E R .
my way! I am late for a work commit- nist they saw occasionally on CNN, so brunette when strategy calls for it.
ment!” the way dark-haired, previous I am mistaking people being especially Most of all, I would like to live in a
me might be expected to do? pleasant for people actually being society in which women can just have a
It is especially frustrating that these more pleasant to all women whom they hair color rather than have a hair color
stereotypes linger at all, since many don’t fear might be potentially cranky with socially assigned temperaments.
powerful women have shown that feminists. Regardless, it is rather nice Nonetheless, I am grateful to
strength has no specific hair color. From to be assumed to be nice—but very Sarah and Seagull. I like that my iden-
Cate Blanchett to Laverne Cox, from alarming and reductive that hair color tity is not fixed and I can still decide
Martha Stewart to Madonna, Eva Perón can do that. to be anyone I want. And I am glad as
to Margaret Thatcher—whatever you On the flip side, it is harder now a staunch feminist, that it was a rock-
may think of these blonde women— to be scary when I want to be. I can’t climbing, blue-haired mermaid who
wimps they are not and were not. One intimidate people when I want to as gave me the courage to try something
of the strongest women I know, editor easily—which had been useful in a fun. I didn’t feel as though I am losing
of this very magazine, Joanna Coles— TV debate. I try to issue the usual with- my feminist credentials for—as we
who faced down lawyers and the ering denunciations from my chair did when we were children and things
consensus of social silence to help me in the television studio, and people— were not yet politicized—playing
run the story documenting a 20-year especially men—relax and chat about around with color. ■

136 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


BEAUTY SWEET THING
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HAIR THAT SMELLS AS GOOD AS IT FEELS


EDITED BY
S A R A AU S T I N &
D A N I E L L E M C N A L LY

Dance
Your
Ass Off
WE’VE
DISCOVERED A
WORKOUT THAT
BURNS
CALORIES, REVS
YOUR HEART
RATE, AND
TONES FROM
HEAD TO TOE—
G R O O M E R : J A M I E F O R A B T P. C O M

AND IT’S SO
FUN, YOU WON’T
WANT IT TO END.
BY DANIELLE
MCNALLY

PHOTO G R A PHED BY A NDRE W H A NC O CK 145


WORKOUT
1 SLAP IT OUT
Stand with feet
hip-width apart, arms at
YOU KNOW HOW YOU don’t even sides. Hop to the left as
you kick right leg and
care that you’re sweating
up a storm when you’re at
lift left arm, swinging
arm toward leg in a
slapping motion.
2 WERK
Stand with feet wide,

a club with your girls? Lower. Immediately


arms at sides. Lower into a
squat, then bend at hips and
That’s what the workouts repeat on opposite side. set hands on the floor in
front of you, lifting heels and
are like at 305 Fitness, a MAKE IT EASIER Don’t be
intimidated by Kurzban’s butt high. Twist right knee
wild dance-cardio studio sky-high kicks. “Bend your
in, then out in a scooping
motion. Switch sides.
in NYC and DC. Creator knees if you need to,” she
says. “The goal is to get LEAN IN This move can
Sadie Kurzban designed your leg off the floor.” feel a bit awkward at first.
this mini at-home class “Focus on a spot a few feet
in front of you,” says
for us (do each step for Kurzban, “and put more
four counts of eight, then weight than you think on
your hands.”
move to the next; repeat
as many times as you
want). So invite your KURZBAN, 26,
CAME UP WITH THE
squad over, move the CONCEPT FOR A
CLUB-LIKE FITNESS
furniture, and just dance. CLASS WHILE PARTYING
WITH A FRIEND
ON SPRING BREAK IN
MIAMI. 305 IS THAT
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3 THE BIRD
Stand with legs together,
arms at sides. Squat, crossing
arms at chest [A]. Lift heels,
and step right foot to the right,
turning knees and toes out
while you lift arms to shoulder-
height out to sides [B]. Step
left foot to meet right, crossing
arms again. Repeat once to
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148 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


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High heels led to more than Medicine.
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two inches reduce stability, tennis ball or alphabet with dips (stand on burns 400
upping injury risk. “You frozen water your toes. This the edge of a extra calories
don’t have to stop wearing bottle for about a will stretch every step, raise heels, a week. So
high heels though. I wear minute. The muscle in your then lower them instead of
them!” says Florida podia- “massage” foot. Repeat on below the step). streaming
reduces other side. These strengthen
trist Grace Torres-Hodges. inflammation, the Achilles and
right into the
Instead, stretch and next episode,
swelling, and calf muscles, pause for a
strengthen from calves to achiness. Repeat which support stroll to the
toes with these exercises. three times. ankles and feet.
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DANIELLE IS DIGGING...
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I’m such a snacker. But I guru Dawn Jackson
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We get it, tap is boring. But instead your-gut bacteria. But
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have unwanted sugar and calories, racks up fast.
make spa water at home with a cute South River Brown Rice
Miso, $11, southriver
infuser (like this one from Fruitzola,
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154 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


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REPORT
WHY
THE HELL
EVERY MORNING, Kara
Waite sees women enter-
ing the tanning salon
next to her local coffee
shop, not far from Tufts

ARE
University and Bunker
Hill Community College,
where Waite, 32, is a pro-
fessor. It fills her with

TANNING
rage. “I want to shake
them and yell, ‘Stop! It’s
not worth losing your
health!’” She knows the

BEDS
danger all too well.
She started tanning at
15 and continued while at
the University of Arizona.
“There was a salon walk-

ON
ing distance from our
sorority house,” she
recalls. “I was a bit over-
weight, so the idea was if

CAMPUS?
you can’t tone it, tan it.”
Four years ago, doc-
tors told Waite she had
melanoma, the deadli-
est form of skin cancer.
It was stage IIIB. Stage
You can’t buy tobacco at most colleges, but many IV is the worst. Today,
are making it easy to get a tan…and cancer. with a 5-inch scar on
BY JANE T LEE her neck where a mole
was excised (the lymph
nodes in her right arm-
pit were removed too),

F R O M L E F T: C L A I R E B E N O I S T/ T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T. C O M ; S I M O N W I L K I N S O N / G E T T Y I M A G E S .
she knows there’s about
a 50 percent chance the
cancer will return…and
likely be untreatable. Her
doctor told her it was
almost certainly a result
of indoor tanning. “I did
this to myself,” she says.
Rates of melanoma
have doubled since 1985,
according to a new Cen-
ters for Disease Control
and Prevention report.
Young women are highly
at risk—it’s the most
common cancer in
women ages 25 to 29—
perhaps because they
flock to tanning salons.
THIS BOX IS
AS BAD FOR More than 419,000
YOU AS THE
ONE MARKED
cases of skin cancer in
CIGARETTES. the U.S. are linked to
indoor tanning annually,

158
REPORT
and a 2013 study in on campus) and there’s a
JAMA Internal Medicine sense among her friends
found that one-third of that being pale is “gross.”
16- to 25-year-old non- But Fox is seeing early
hispanic white women signs of skin damage
fake tan (not the safe from her tanning habit. “I
spray kind) at least once started as a junior in high
a year. It’s just so freak- school. I felt in competi-
ing easy. According to tion to be the tannest at
JAMA Dermatology, sev- prom,” she says. “Then I
eral million young adults kept it up because I
have access to indoor thought I looked better.
tanning facilities on—not Now I can feel the skin on
just near—their college my forehead getting loose
campuses or for free in and see faint outlines of
their off-campus apart- wrinkles.” (Ninety per-
ment buildings. cent of signs of aging, like
Last year, researchers “People wrinkles, brown spots,
looked at indoor tanning ing a mixed message by take ning bed in a privately and sagging, are due to
at the country’s top 125 making access to these indoor owned facility on cam- UV exposure, Dr. Karen
colleges and found that dangerous beds easy,” tanning pus, but a spokesperson notes.) Fox wants to cut
12 percent of schools had says dermatologist Julie more said the issue “hadn’t back on tanning but says
on-campus tanning facil- Karen, MD, a spokesper- lightly come up”—i.e., nobody it’s hard—she likes the
ities. At 42 percent, there son for the Skin Cancer than complained. Penn State way it makes her look.
they do
were off-campus student Foundation. “They’re officials said they don’t Salons appeal to our
smoking,
housing facilities boast- saying it’s acceptable.” believe in banning ser- vanity by promoting what
but not a
ing tanning beds that, in vices just because they many women incorrectly
lot of
many cases, were free COSMO REACHED OUT to 34 people
may be harmful but pre- believe is a healthy glow.
and unrestricted. Fifteen of the colleges high- are fer to educate coeds about They claim using tanning
percent referred students lighted in Pagoto’s study dying at potential dangers. (The beds boost vitamin D, but
via the school website to for comment. We heard 25 from university did not answer according to the Skin
housing with on-site tan- back from 20. About lung queries on how it is doing Cancer Foundation, the
ning. And at more than two-thirds of those are cancer.” so.) Miami University’s beds primarily emit UVA
14 percent of schools, stu- making positive changes. MU Bucks program is rays, which don’t stimu-
dents could use campus Rutgers, the University primarily for use at off- late D production. Says
debit cards for not just of Northern Arizona, the campus vendors, includ- Pagoto, “There’s a lack of
textbooks, food, and University of Mississippi, ing a tanning salon, and education.”
laundry but tanning too. Western Kentucky Uni- is run by a private com- “Colleges offer ameni-
Tanning beds were versity, Georgia Southern pany. Although accounts ties like tanning because
condoned even at col- University, and Ohio are tied to students’ ID students demand them,”
leges with a tobacco-free State University all said cards, a spokesperson says Barmak Nassirian,
policy or a school of pub- they have banned or will said the school doesn’t director of policy analy-
lic health. “People take be banning on-campus endorse merchants in the sis at the American Asso-
tanning more lightly than tanning or the use of MU Bucks program…yet ciation of State Colleges
they do smoking, but not campus cards to pay for it does prohibit using the and Universities. “But the
a lot of people are dying it. A rep for Marquette card to buy alcohol. issue is absolutely legiti-
at 25 from lung can- University confirmed Abby Fox, 19, a soph- mate. I expect that a year
cer,” says study author that there is a facility omore at the University from now, you’ll have a
Sherry L. Pagoto, PhD, nearby that offers tan- of Louisville, says that hard time finding insti-
an associate professor ning payable with the most of her sorority sis- tutions that affiliate with
of medicine at the Uni- Marquette Cash card but ters tan regularly (she tanning salons.” Good
versity of Massachusetts that the school is consid- notes there are tanning news: There’s hope for
Medical School. Per the ering eliminating this beds in a laundry room the class of 2019. ■
International Agency during the next round of
for Research on Cancer, negotiations.
tobacco and UV radiation Other schools don’t Want to Make Sure Tanning Isn’t Okay at Your Alma Mater?
are equally carcinogenic. appear to believe it war- Tell your university president! This year, the Skin Cancer Foundation
“It’s the schools’ job to rants action. Rochester launched the Campaign to Stop College Tanning. Head to SkinCancer.org
educate and protect stu- Institute of Technology, to send a letter to these colleges, asking them to ban access on campus.
dents, and they’re send- for example, has a tan-

160 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


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Sex, drugs, rock ‘n’ roll and murder.
Welcome to L.A.’s Sunset Strip, 1982.
Starring Ed Westwick, Erika Christensen,
Taissa Farmiga and Jeremy Sisto,
Wicked City premieres Tuesday,
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Get a frst look abc.com/WickedCity
Ilana Glazer
ACTOR, COCREATOR,
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DO YOU KNOW “Comedy is


important
WHY WE GET TO TALK philosophically
in our culture. Today,
SEX, POWER, AND people aren’t
LOVE AND LIVE LIKE turning to
dramas for
AWESOME messaging.
Comedy points
#BOSSBITCHES? to truth.”
BECAUSE
HELEN GURLEY
BROWN CHANGED
THE GAME
50 YEARS AGO
WHEN SHE CREATED
THE MODERN
COSMOPOLITAN
MAGAZINE.
TO CELEBRATE
HGB, THE ORIGINAL
HBIC, WE’VE NAMED
THE 50 WOMEN
LEADERS
WHO ARE DISRUPTING
AND INSPIRING
THE WAY WE ALL
THINK AND ACT.
SO CHOOSE
YOUR SPIRIT BADASS
AND GO ROCK
THE WORLD.
BY
Laura Brounstein,
Judith Ohikuare, and Danielle Kam
St yled by Marissa Webb for Banana Republ ic
Photographed by Marcus Mam

162
Abbi Jacobson
ACTOR, COCREATOR,
BROAD CITY
“It’s a great
time to be
a woman
in comedy.”

MEET
COSMO’S
FUN,
ON ILANA: TOP, dRA.
SKIRT, Self-Portrait.
SHOES, Rupert
Sanderson. EARRINGS,
Moratorium.
NECKLACE, Banana
FEARLESS
50
Republic. RINGS
(middle finger),
Wetherly; (pinkie
finger) Michelle
Campbell. ON ABBI:
TOP, SKIRT, Banana
Republic. SHOES,
Sergio Rossi.
EARRINGS, Lara
Bohinc. BRACELET,
Stanmore. RING,
Rebecca Minkoff
KARLIE KLOSS

ERICA LAFFERTY

KIM JORDAN

Karlie Kloss
Supermodel,
NYU freshman,
Kode with
Karlie founder,
vlogger, and
L’Oréal Paris
spokesperson…
and age 23. ON CARLY: TOP,
Yasss. Xinnatex New York.
SKIRT, Self-Portrait.
Erica Lafferty EARRINGS, her own.
GUN-CONTROL ADVOCATE, NECKLACE, Holst + Lee.
EVERYTOWN RINGS, her own. ON
FOR GUN SAFET Y DANIELLE: JACKET,
“My mom was Reiss. DRESS, Adeam.
gunned down EARRINGS, her own.
as the principal NECKLACE, Banana
of Sandy Hook Republic. BRACELETS
Elementary. (blue), CC Skye;
(gold) Wxyz Jewelry.
She inspires me
RING, Dannijo
to be fearless.
So I lobby
Congress, tear
up town-hall
meetings,
laugh and cry
with survivors.
We demand
change.”

Kim Jordan
COFOUNDER/EXECUTIVE
CHAIR, NEW BELGIUM Carly Zakin, left, and Danielle Weisberg
BREWING COMPANY COFOUNDERS, THESKIMM
“I get to choose
to use our “By helping women
business as a
platform to be more informed, we
advocate for
family-friendly empower them to
work policies
and environ- know they can strike
mental steward-
ship. That is so
up a conversation
much fun.” with anyone.”
—DANIELLE WEISBERG

164
Jess Lee
COFOUNDER/CEO, POLY VORE
“When we were
trying to raise money Chimamanda
for Polyvore, we were Ngozi Adichie
NOVELIST
pitching male VCs
who didn’t get that “She had always liked
shopping and fashion this image of herself
is a form of entertain­ as too much trouble,
ment. We figured as different, and she
out how to use data sometimes thought…
and comparisons to that kept her safe.”
show what we could —Americanah JESS LEE CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE
be. It worked!”
Cristina Jiménez
COFOUNDER AND MANAGING
Reese Witherspoon and
DIRECTOR, UNITED WE DREAM
Bruna Papandrea NETWORK
COFOUNDERS, PACIFIC STAN-
“The U.S. Congress
DARD PRODUCTION COMPANY
today is, like, 80
“It is very important
percent male and
for women to speak
white, so the views
up and even more
of visionary women
important for them
are challenged daily.
to take action.
Find other women
We want to motivate
who you can rely on,
women to create
because together we
change in their com­
can create the world
munities, their
we want for our
offices, and their
children.”
worlds.”
V E R N I S . C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P L E F T: M A R T O N P E R L A K I ; L A K I N O G U N B A N W O ; C O U R T E S Y S U B J E C T; J O R D A N D O N E R ; G E T T Y I M A G E S ;
S T Y L I N G P R O D U C T S ; M A K E U P : K E R R I E J O R D A N U S I N G K O H G E N D O. C A R LY Z A K I N A N D D A N I E L L E W E I S B E R G — M A K E U P : S A R A G L I C K
U S I N G D I O R S K I N N U D E ; H A I R : J E A N I E S Y F U U S I N G T R E S E M M É F O R AT E L I E R M A N A G E M E N T; M A N I C U R E : J U L I E K A N D A L E C F O R D I O R

REESE WITHERSPOON AND BRUNA PAPANDREA CRISTINA JIMÉNEZ


I L L U S T R AT I O N S BY N ATA L I A S A N A B R I A . A B B I JAC O B S O N A N D I L A N A G L A Z E R— H A I R: K AT E H A N L E Y U S I N G B U M B L E A N D B U M B L E

Whitney Wolfe
Piper Kerman DRESS,
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AUTHOR OF THE MEMOIR Veronica
ORANGE IS THE NEW BLACK, “Our generation Beard.
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“I teach writing now but it’s important to
in two state prisons. take an active role
We have to under­ in your relationships
stand people’s lives too. Why not
and experiences and approach the search
give them a voice and for love and
listen to their stories.” meaningful
connection in an
Christina Tosi empowered and
CHEF/FOUNDER AND OWNER, confident way?”
MILK BAR, MASTERCHEF JUDGE
“At Milk Bar, we Danielle Green
approach the specific VETERAN, PURPLE HEART PIPER KERMAN WHITNEY WOLFE
FOX; MARCUS MAM; WILLIAMS + HIR AK AWA /CORBIS.

—a new recipe—and RECIPIENT, PAT TILLMAN


the vast with vigor, AWARDEE
honesty, open­ “I felt the most
hearted adventure, fearless during my
fearlessness, self­ four months in Iraq.
starting zest, focus, In a war zone, there’s
seriousness when no time for fear, your
needed, but with natural reaction is
hilarity and fight. My ‘invincible
celebration mentality’ helped
throughout.” me make split­second
decisions when I
needed to.” CHRISTINA TOSI DANIELLE GREEN
Serena Williams
TENNIS PLAYER, OLYMPIC
MEGYN KELLY MISTY COPELAND GOLD MEDALIST, DESIGNER
Winner of 21 Grand
Slams! All hail the
Megyn Kelly queen.
ANCHOR, FOX NEWS CHANNEL’S
THE KELLY FILE
Jessica Alba
“I am in a fun, intel- ACTRESS AND FOUNDER/COO,
lectually stimulating, THE HONEST COMPANY
sometimes tough line “I wanted safe, eco-
of work. At the friendly products for
anchor desk, I wear my family and home
my superhero cape—I and to buy them
bring my strongest online. That didn’t
self. At home, I am exist. People told me
softer. When adver- it wouldn't work.
sity hits, I follow this But I believed in my
mantra: Head idea, went for it,
down…shoulders and disrupted the
back…forge forward.” industry!”

AVA D U V E R N AY— M A K E U P : R I C K Y W I L S O N FO R C L O U T I E R R E M I X ; H A I R : M A R L E N E FO R D E FO R B E S T L O C T I C I A N A N D N AT U R A L H A I R .
CECILE RICHARDS

Misty Copeland Caitlyn Jenner


PRINCIPAL DANCER, AMERICAN I AM CAIT STAR

C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P L E F T: G E T T Y I M A G E S ; H E N R Y L E U T W Y L E R / C O N T O U R B Y G E T T Y I M A G E S ; C O U R T E S Y S U B J E C T;
BALLET THEATRE “I don’t think I have
“I hope that my voice ever been more
is helping to change

D AV I D S L I J P E R / T R U N K A R C H I V E ; L A U R E N V I C T O R I A B U R K E /A P P H O T O ; J A M E S W H I T E F O R E ! ; N I C K L E A R Y.
excited about life
the perception of than I am right now.
ballet as exclusive I’m living my true
and inaccessible. identity and
I want it to be a more hopefully going to
inclusive world that make a difference—
welcomes everyone, that’s my mission.”
because that’s the
only way this
beautiful art form
Mary Bonauto
CIVIL RIGHTS PROJECT
can take center stage.” DIRECTOR, GAY AND LESBIAN
ADVOCATES AND DEFENDERS

SERENA WILLIAMS JESSICA ALBA Cecile Richards “It is thrilling to be


PRESIDENT, PLANNED part of a team of
PARENTHOOD people who stand up
“I haven’t ever held a for basic American
job where people values like liberty
weren’t pissed off at and equality. When
me. If you’re out there we break down
trying to change artificial barriers
the world and not and discover our
pissing someone off, shared humanity,
you’re probably not it leads to less
doing your job. You discrimination.”
just have to push
CAITLYN JENNER MARY BONAUTO forward.”

166
SARA BLAKELY

AUDREY COOPER

BEYONCÉ

Sara Blakely
FOUNDER, SPANX,
YOUNGEST FEMALE SELF-
MADE BILLIONAIRE TO SIGN
THE GIVING PLEDGE
“My commit­
ment to support­
ing women
started with
butts, but that
Ava DuVernay was just the
FILMMAKER, SELMA beginning!

“A black woman making


Pledging to give
away half my

art is a disruptive endeavor.


wealth to ele­
vate women

Every story that I tell was an easy


one!”

as a woman is a political act. Audrey Cooper


Even if I want to tell EDITOR-IN-CHIEF, SAN
FRANCISCO CHRONICLE

a ‘silly love story,’ the fact “No one


is entitled to an
that it exists through uninformed
opinion.”
my gaze is radical.” Beyoncé
1 MILLION BEYONCÉ
ALBUMS SOLD IN LESS
THAN ONE WEEK.
“Changed the
game with that
digital drop /
Know where
you was when
that digital
popped /
I stopped the
world /
SHIRT, Banana
Male or female,
Republic. it make no
SKIRT, Milly. difference /
SHOES, Rupert I stop the world,
Sanderson. world stop—
RINGS, her own Carry on.”
—“Feeling Myself,” Nicki
Minaj feat. Beyoncé
MELINDA GATES

SHERYL SANDBERG

Meridith Valiando Rojas


COFOUNDER/CEO, DIGITOUR
“I look young, and I’m
often the only woman
in outside meetings. I
see guys thinking,
How old are you?
How much could you
DANIELLA KALLMEYER
know? How big could
Melinda Gates your business be? But
COFOUNDER, when I start talking,
SHIRT, DKNY. SKIRT,
THE BILL AND MELINDA Marissa Webb. showing that we are
GATES FOUNDATION SHOES, Oscar De La the experts in the
“What does Renta. BRACELETS, field, explaining that
changing the CC Skye. RINGS, we were the first in
world look like? Alibi NYC
our space and have
Every woman MERIDITH VALIANDO ROJAS
who sacrifices tripled our revenue,

M A K E U P : S A R A G L I C K U S I N G D I O R S K I N N U D E . H A I R : J E A N I E S Y F U U S I N G T R E S E M M É F O R AT E L I E R M A N A G E M E N T. M A N I C U R E :
J U L I E K A N D A L E C F O R D I O R V E R N I S . C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P L E F T: A L E X E I H AY/ T R U N K A R C H I V E ; E M I LY S H U R / C O R B I S ; A P P L E ;
they pay attention.”

M A R C U S M A M ; T H E C OV E T E U R ; M A A R T E N D E B OA R /C O N T O U R B Y G E T T Y I M AG E S; M . S H A R K E Y/C O N T O U R B Y G E T T Y I M AG E S .
to send her kids
to school, insists
on health care,
lifts herself out Patrisse Cullors, Alicia
of poverty via Garza, and Opal Tometi
entrepreneur- COFOUNDERS,
ship, or uses #BLACKLIVESMATTER
contraception “#BlackLivesMatter
to determine is a rehumanization
her own future.” project. Saying those
Sheryl Sandberg words out loud
COO, FACEBOOK restores people’s
“In the future, dignity. It’s a way for
there will be no us to love each other,
female leaders. love ourselves, and
There will just project that love into
be leaders.”
the world so that we
—Lean In
can transform it.”
Daniella Kallmeyer —ALICIA GARZA
FOUNDER AND DESIGNER,
KALLMEYER NEW YORK ON ALICIA: TOP, Zara. SKIRT,
“I design so a DKNY. SHOES, SILVER CUFF,
woman’s per- Banana Republic. SILVER
sonality can COILED BRACELETS, PLAIN
shine through, SILVER RING, W. Britt.
to make her POINTED RING, Moratorium.
ON OPAL: JUMPSUIT, Diane
stand taller and
Von Furstenberg. EAR­
see herself as
RINGS, BRACELETS,
the woman she Moratorium. RINGS, Alibi
wants to NYC. ON PATRISSE: DRESS,
become.” Harper and Liv. SHOES,
Monique Lhuillier.
ALICIA GARZA, OPAL TOMETI, AND PATRISSE CULLORS BRACELET, Moratorium

168
Lena Dunham
ACTOR, WRITER, PRODUCER,
DIRECTOR, GIRLS
“My voice and my you want to be low-
proverbial pen are key and don’t want
mine forever, and that everyone looking at
gets me high. My you, and other days,
greatest hope when I you say, I look good—
began was that I and own it!”
could shift the beauty
LENA DUNHAM MINDY KALING standard for women. Mindy Kaling
My greatest hope now ACTOR, WRITER, CREATOR,
is that I can help to THE MINDY PROJECT
give a voice to many “You know that thing
women who haven’t you’re obsessed with
had one before. Every or fixated on that
version of feminism seems a little weird or
and femininity nerdy? For me, that
deserves a platform.” was TV and comedy.
I realized how lucky I
Alison Bechdel was to have an intense
CARTOONIST, AUTHOR OF THE passion, because it
GRAPHIC MEMOIR FUN HOME, gave me something to
AND COCREATOR OF THE work toward.”
BECHDEL-WALLACE TEST, WHICH
ASSESSES GENDER INEQUALIT Y
IN MOVIES Shaan Pruden
“As a lesbian, I’ve SENIOR DIRECTOR, PARTNER-
gotten a lot of SHIP MANAGEMENT, APPLE
ALISON BECHDEL SHAAN PRUDEN messages about how I “Don’t go home in
should look, act, and shame if you try
JACKET, VEST,
Marissa feel. In order to hang something new and it
Webb. SHIRT, on to my real self, I doesn’t work out. It’s
Banana have tried to speak like a badge of honor
Republic. in the Valley. Dust
up and tell my story.
JEANS, Ag
It was never my yourself off, get up,
intention to change and do it again.”
the world…only to
change my world.” Sandra Lopez
DIRECTOR, BUSINESS AND
Gina Rodriguez MARKETING STRATEGY FOR
WEARABLE TECH, INTEL
ACTOR, JANE THE VIRGIN
“Every role I’ve “Intel has begun an
chosen has been one I initiative to have a fully
think will push representative work-
forward my idea of force by 2020. I’m
liberating young girls committed to diversi-
GINA RODRIGUEZ from feeling that they fying Silicon Valley,
have to look like a but I can only make
specific beauty type.” change if I work with
people across all my
communities: other
Lisa Eldridge women, other Latinos,
LANCÔME GLOBAL MAKEUP
CREATIVE DIRECTOR AND
and my Intel cowork-
YOUTUBE STAR ers. I especially talk to
“Makeup lets you my male colleagues,
wake up and say, encouraging them, for
Who do I want to be example, to recruit and
today? Sometimes, sponsor all women as
well as under-
LISA ELDRIDGE SANDRA LOPEZ represented men.”
JACKET, Marissa
Webb. JEANS,
Banana
Republic. SHOES,
Miu Miu.
JEWELRY,
Marissa’s own

TAYLOR SWIFT

DEBBIE STERLING

HILLARY CLINTON

DRESS, Alice +
TARAJI P. HENSON Olivia by
Stacey
Taylor Swift Bendet.
GRAMMY AWARD–WINNING JACKET,
SINGER/SONGWRITER American
“Can’t stop, Eagle
won’t stop mov- Outfitters.
BRACELETS
ing / It’s like I
(from top),
got this music /
Lele Sadoughi;
In my mind / Lulu Frost
Saying
it’s gonna be
alright.”
—“Shake It Off”

Debbie Sterling

M A R I S S A W E B B — M A K E U P : C H R I S T O P H E R A R D O F F U S I N G D I O R S H O W AT A R T D E PA R T M E N T; H A I R : D A V I D C R U Z
FOUNDER AND CEO, GOLD-
IEBLOX, COOL ENGINEER-
ING TOYS FOR GIRLS
“It’s easy to get
disheartened
when, in 2015,

U S I N G O R I B E H A I R C A R E . H I L L A R Y: C H R I S T O P H E R L A N E /C O N T O U R B Y G E T T Y I M AG E S .
a Nobel prize– ALICIA QUARLES
winning
scientist says Hillary Clinton Alicia Quarles
things like
FORMER U.S. SECRETARY ENTERTAINMENT JOURNAL-
‘girls’ don’t IST AND PATIENT ADVOCATE
OF STATE, PRESIDENTIAL
belong in CANDIDATE
the lab. But “Be relentless
when we stand “Every time I’ve about your health.
together, run for office, I’ve If someone in your
we won’t be been accused of family is sick, you
ignored.” Marissa Webb playing the gender would ask every
CREATIVE DIRECTOR, BANANA REPUBLIC card. If calling for question, so do the
Taraji P. Henson
ACTOR, EMPIRE “Rules? I am not a big equal pay and
paid leave and a
same for yourself.
If you don’t under­
“Art is a vehicle
to change the fan. I always say break all higher minimum stand something,
world, a moti-
vator and truth the rules, because fashion wage and more
women in posi­
you ask and you
ask and you ask
teller. I am
always going should be personalized. tions of leadership
across the country
again. And you
get a second
to speak the
truth, to shed Don’t put yourself in a box.” is playing the opinion. Nobody
light where it’s gender card, then knows your body
needed.” deal me in.” like you do.”

170 WATCH WHAT HAPPENED AT OUR FUN, FEARLESS 50 SHOOT ON THE DIGITAL EDITION: MY.COSMOPOLITAN.COM.
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Bethany Mota
YOUTUBE STAR, DESIGNER
“I used to hold myself
multiple rubber boat
back in fear that
movements, and 27
people would judge
days of mock combat
my ideas or opinions.
patrols. Damn, girls!
Once I started
challenging myself
and taking risks, Laverne Cox
I realized how capable ACTOR, ORANGE IS
THE NEW BLACK
I really was. You
are your ideas—run “We have more in
BETHANY MOTA MOJ MAHDARA with them!” common than we have
differences. When we
love people, we allow
Moj Mahdara them to determine
CEO, BEAUT YCON, A DIGITAL AND
LIVE-EVENT COMMUNIT Y CON-
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NECTING YOUTUBE STARS WITH let them have control
THEIR FANS over their bodies
“Everyone—male, without judgment.”
female, transgender,
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ideas and causes and GLOBAL, WHICH PROVIDES
for those whose voices AFFORDABLE AND SAFE REPRO-
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UCTS FOR WOMEN IN
DEVELOPING COUNTRIES
Mellody Hobson “I’m proud my work
PRESIDENT, ARIEL INVESTMENTS helps women around
An advocate for finan­ the world access and
MELLODY HOBSON 1ST LT. SHAYE HAVER AND CAPT. KRISTEN GRIEST cial literacy, especially afford high­quality
for women, she sits contraception. I want
on three corporate to be fearless in
boards—DreamWorks annihilating the idea
Animation (where’s that women’s
she’s chair), Starbucks, reproductive health is
and Estée Lauder—in something to be

C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P L E F T: A N D R E W M C P H E R S O N ; C O U R T E S Y S U B J E C T; J O H N B A Z E M O R E /A P P H O T O ;
addition to running a discussed in the
$10.9 billion shadows. And men
investment firm. have to be part of the
conversation.”

G A V I N B O N D /A U G U S T; J . R . M A N K O F F/A U G U S T; C O U R T E S Y S U B J E C T; G E T T Y I M A G E S .
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a land navigation test, trated, and I have
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+ a 12­mile foot march
I’ve had periods when
in 3 hours, obstacle
1 GUY courses, 4 days of I almost gave up.
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eering, 3 parachute a powerful single
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on helicopters, me, and I kept going.
And today, I feel
optimistic and like we
SAUNDRA PELLETIER ADRIAN GRENIER can move the needle.”

172
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PHOTOGRAPHED BY FRANCESCO CARROZZINI. STYLED BY ELIZABETH STEWART. HAIR: (KHLOÉ) JEN ATKIN FOR WELLA PROFESSIONALS AT THE WALL GROUP; (KENDALL, KYLIE) SCOTT CUNHA FOR THEONLY.AGENCY USING
ORIBE AND KARDASHIAN BEAUTY. MAKEUP: (KYLIE) JOYCE BONELLI; (KHLOÉ) MARIO DEDIVANOVIC AT THE WALL GROUP; (KENDALL) ROB SCHEPPY FOR CLOUTIER REMIX USING TWEEZERMAN BRUSH IQ. MANICURE:
(KHLOÉ, KYLIE) KIMMIE KYEES FOR ORLY INT’L; (KENDALL) KIM TRUONG. PRODUCTION: FIRST SHOT PRODUCTIONS. PROP STYLIST: ANDY HENBEST/FRANK REPS. SEE PAGE 254 FOR SHOPPING INFORMATION.

SEXY WHAT ’S

—KHLOÉ KARDASHIAN
“ WE DON’T HAVE TO BE FRIENDS

BUT WE’RE FRIENDS BY CHOICE.”


W I T H O N E A N O T H E R . W E ’ R E FA M I LY B Y B L O O D,
FOR NOVEMBER

Kavant & Sharart. BRACELETS (worn throughout), Kylie’s own Cartier. RINGS
throughout), Khloé’s own Cartier. ON KYLIE: TOP, SKIRT, Franziska Fox. EARRINGS,

(on right), Jefferson NYC; (on left) Fallon. ON KENDALL: DRESS, Fendi
ON KHLOÉ: DRESS, House of CB London. EARRINGS, W. Britt. BRACELET (worn

173
WE ARE FAMILY.
G R A B T H E C H A M P E R S! T O C E L E B R AT E O U R 5 0 T H

B I R T H D AY, T H E G I R L S Q U A D T O E N D A L L G I R L S Q U A D S

SHARES THE SECRE T S OF THEIR RIDE- OR- DIE

S I S T E R H O O D . B U T F I R S T…T H E I R S E L F - D E S C R I B E D “ B I G

BROTHER,” KEEPING UP WITH THE K ARDASHIANS

E X E C U T I V E P R O D U C E R R YA N S E A C R E S T, E X P L A I N S W H Y

THERE’S NO QUITTING THESE COSMO GIRLS.

SHIRTS (on Khloé, Kylie, and


Kourtney), Marc Jacobs; (on
Kris, Kendall, and Kim) Calvin
Klein White Label. SHOES (on
Kylie, Kendall, and Kim),
Jimmy Choo
174
AS TOLD TO last july, i was spend time with them, I also admire their
KATIE L. CONNOR honored when Kris what resonates is the work ethic. They are
PHOTOGRAPHED BY
Jenner asked me to family unit. There are always on time and
FRANCESCO CARROZZINI host a special gradu- so many things about professional. And
ation party for Ken- them that are glamor- while there are plenty
STYLED BY dall and Kylie. I said ous, crazy, and unlike of days when they are
E L I Z A BET H ST E WA RT to them how proud I our lives, but the sense traveling and doing
was of how they have of family is universal. amazing things, there
handled the craziness They love and stand by are just as many days
of the show. Growing one another no mat- when they are going
up is tough—imagine ter what. And there through something
being at the center of is something so hon- emotional and find it
the zeitgeist. est about the way the difficult to have a pro-
No one could have sisters speak to each ducer in the room. But
predicted the Kar- other—their unvar- early on, before the
dashians’ and Jenners’ nished candor reveals show even began, they
success. But when you how close they really made a family pact
are. What’s more, they that they were going to
present acceptance. document their lives
You look at Bruce and through thick and
now Caitlyn—you see thin. It takes courage
the power of a family to to go on camera and
come together when it deal with something
would be so easy to fall with which you never
apart. There’s comfort thought you’d be deal-
in viewing that stead- ing. I, for one, thank
fastness of love. them for sharing the
journey, because more
often than not, it’s not
only entertaining, it’s
inspiring.
— RYA N S E A C R E S T
KIM
ON KOURTNEY
i don ’ t k now wh at i would
have done if I’d been born first. I
copied every single thing that
Kourtney did. She taught me how
to tie my shoes. She taught me
everything. I couldn’t have sur-
vived life without her.
Of course, we’ve had some
huge fights. She knows exactly
how to get to other people. I had
to wear a bra at a really young age,
and she would destroy me over it. BE AU T Y T I P
But you can say anything to her— SCORE THE K’S
SIGNATURE SHINY
nothing fazes her.
STRANDS BY
She is the most practical one—
SMOOTHING
stable and calm. Every once in a KARDASHIAN BEAUTY
while she’ll break down, but she BLACK SEED DRY
always has the attitude of “We’re O IL , $16.5 0,
going to get through this. It’s FROM MID-LENGTH
going to be okay.” It’s rare to see TO ENDS.
her cry. The moment you’d expect
to see someone cry is the exact
moment when she won’t cry.
I’m not really a fearless per-
son. After becoming a mom, I
became more fearful. But I think
Kourtney is the bravest. In the
beginning of the show, when I
thought little things were such a
big deal and would get so upset,
she made me realize they weren’t.
She taught me that it’s not worth
wasting your energy on things
that ultimately don’t matter.
What’s surprising is that in
college, she was a wild party girl.
She didn’t like kids growing up.
She had a kids’ clothing store and
hated when kids came in! Now
she’s the best mom in the world.
And as a new mom, I call her for
everything. It’s exactly like how
we were before. I just copy Kourt-
ney. And it’s funny—my daughter
wants to do everything that
Kourtney’s daughter, Penelope,
does. We’ve come full circle.

HAIR: (Kris, Kim) Chris McMillan for Living Proof @


SoloArtists.com; (Khloé) Jen Atkin for Wella
Professionals at The Wall Group; (Kourtney)
Peter Savic at Opus Beauty; (Kendall, Kylie) Scott
Cunha for TheOnly.Agency using Oribe and Kardashian
Beauty. MAKEUP: (Kris, Kylie) Joyce Bonelli; (Kim,
Khloé) Mario Dedivanovic at The Wall Group; (Kendall,
Kourtney) Rob Scheppy for Cloutier Remix using
Tweezerman Brush IQ. MANICURE: (Kris, Kim) Kailey
Phan; (Khloé, Kylie) Kimmie Kyees for Orly Int’l;
(Kendall, Kourtney) Kim Truong. PRODUCTION: First DRESS, House
Shot Productions. PROP STYLING: Andy Henbest/ of CB London
Frank Reps. See page 254 for shopping information.

176
Everyone in my
family teases
me about being too
dressed up and
taking too many
selfies.”
—KIM
KHLOÉ ON KIM
i am the mommy to kendall
and Kylie, and I have a play-
ful relationship with Kourtney.
But my relationship with Kim is
more adult. I go to her for really
serious matters. Some people you
talk to and it’s in one ear and out
the other. Kim genuinely listens.
During a breakup, you think,
This is it. No one’s going to date
me again. Kim is the person who
reminds you that life is going to
be okay. Because of her past rela-
tionships, she has felt the same
way, so she knows what to say.
Growing up, I thought she
was the coolest ever. She’s always
been so beautiful, and I was
enamored by what it must be
like to look like an effortlessly
beautiful girl. I always tried
to do my hair like hers, which
didn’t work since my hair is
blonde and curly. I was always
being compared to my sisters
because I looked so different
from them. It was frustrating
because I would never look like
them—I am Khloé, not them!
When our dad died, I dis-
tanced myself not just from Kim
but from everybody. After a
couple of years, we went back to
having a great relationship. Now
that Kim is in such a happy place
in her life—married and has such
peace with her babies—we get
along so great. Sometimes I see
her roll her eyes at me, but I don’t
take it personally. It’s just that
my energy level is loud and she’s
really soft-spoken and quiet. She
doesn’t like to curse or drink. I’m
like a truck driver in comparison.
It’s frustrating that anyone
would think Kim is self-centered
or cares only about looks. She
has the biggest heart. She wants
to uplift everyone. Just because
someone takes a selfie—which
is what the whole world does!—
doesn’t mean she should be
DRESS, Cushnie
et Ochs. labeled as egotistical. You can
OPPOSITE PAGE: take a fucking selfie. That doesn’t
DRESS, Gomez- define where your heart is.
Gracia
I care more what
somebody says about
my sisters than what
they say about me.
I can handle it, but
I’m protective over
everybody else.”
—KOURTNEY

KOURTNEY
ON KENDALL i was in the delivery room
And I don’t think age matters
when it comes to relationship
advice. It isn’t always all about
experience. Sometimes Kendall
were going to look like! But she
just knew. I’m still blown away
that she saw what she wanted in
life and made it happen.
when Kendall was born. It was and Kylie are more in tune with I’ve told her that going to
magical to witness my mom their emotions, because as we college was one of the best expe-
giving birth. Before I went get older, if we’ve been burned, riences just as far as living out-
off to college, I would babysit we can shut our emotions down. side of my home, learning how
her all the time. She and Kylie I love talking to them because to do laundry, and making my
reminded me a lot of Kim and they’re so much more open. And own friends that weren’t also
me—we were inseparable. Kendall is pretty level-headed. friends with Kim. But Kendall
In superficial ways, Kendall She sees things from both sides. has that with her job. She trav-
and I are opposites, like, I’m From a very early age, Ken- els, lives away from home, has
5 feet tall and she’s a super- dall would say, “I’m gonna be a had to learn how to take care
model. But our demeanor is model.” Looking back, I’m like, of herself and make her own
similar. We’re even-keeled, not how did you even know that? friends. She has an amazing
dramatic. My sisters are the You had no clue how tall you work ethic, so for her world, she
people I feel safest talking to. were going to be or what you made a great decision.

NOVEMBER 2015 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ 179


BEAUTY TIP
WHO DOESN’T
WANT SKIN
THIS FL AWLESS?
K E N D A L L’ S
S E C R E T: E S T É E
LAUDER
DOUBLE WEAR
MAKEUP TO GO
L I Q U I D C O M PA C T,
$45.

Kylie and I are


both pretty
brave—much
braver than the
Kardashians.
We have the
Jenner in us.”
—KENDALL

180
ON KENDALL: DRESS, Fendi. ON
KHLOÉ: DRESS, House of CB
London. ON KYLIE: TOP, Framziska
Fox. EARRINGS, Kavant &
Sharart. CUFF, Jennifer Fisher
KENDALL
ON KYLIE
our family grew up in twos —
Khloé and Rob, Kourtney and
Kim, Brandon and Brody, Burt
and Casey.…We’re pairs, and
Kylie is my two.
With our dad [and the tran- Me, Khloé,
sition], my sisters and I, we all
had our experiences with it, but and Rob, we’re
for Kylie and me, being the clos- the weird ones
est in age, we had our intimate
moments of catching him or
of the family.”
finding things. Those moments —KYLIE
were me and Kylie only, so we
had a different connection with
it. My dad is my dad. He’s their
dad too, but he’s my blood. I was
Daddy’s girl and was so
obsessed with her—same with
Kylie—we spent every day with
my dad, so it had a special effect
on both of us.
Everyone thinks based on
how she looks and acts that
Kylie is super mature and
grown up, and I’m sure she loves
that. But I see the Kylie who’s
young and fun. When you’re
around her, she brightens the
room. I know that sounds
cheesy, but she has this energy
that’s awesome. Even when she
was little, she was always crazy,
chatty, and all over the place.
My brother would get a new
BEAUTY TIP
girlfriend, and she would lock
COMPLETE WITH
her out of the house in the rain A LIPSTICK AND
just because she thought it was GLOSS, KYLIE’S
funny. She’s a wild card. L I P K I T, $ 2 9 (O U T
She’s a Leo so she loves atten- NOW!), IS THE
tion, and at certain points when E A SIE ST WAY TO
we were younger, it bothered CRE ATE A
her that I was getting attention P L U M P E R P O U T.
in terms of my modeling. I think
that’s a natural younger-sister
thing—to be jealous. I was jeal-
ous of her at times too! But now
she loves what I do and supports
me. She’s very into fashion and
always texts me when I’m doing
a big show like, “That is the sick-
est thing ever! How were the
clothes?” It’s as much a part of
her life as it is mine.

182
KYLIE
ON KHLOÉ
khloé puts her a ll in to
her relationships. She loves
really hard. I feel like people
don’t realize that. She drops
everything for everybody.
Growing up, she was like a
second mom to me. Because she
was younger, Kendall and I con-
fided in her because we thought
my mom wouldn’t understand.
I’m sure she would call my mom
and tell her everything, but she
always had our backs. If we ever
had an issue with people, she
would call the other person’s
parents. Just last night, we were
at a party together, and a guy
was being super rude to me. She
went off on him.
When I wanted to be on
Facebook, Khloé had the pass-
word. She probably still has my
Twitter password, but we’ve
moved past that. Of course my
mom was also hands-on—she
was the scariest person growing
up—but Khloé gave my life a
balance. I wouldn’t be as funny
if it weren’t for her. She made me
feel like I could be myself.
Now that I’m older, there
have been times when we’ve got-
ten into arguments because she
still thinks of me as her baby sis-
ter. When I was 8 and she was
20, we couldn’t talk about
everything—we just weren’t on
the same level. But now that I’m
18, I have my own home, and I’m
doing my thing, we understand
each other. We’re best friends.
And even though she is older
and has been through different
relationships, she never tells me
who to date and who not to date.
She lets me live my life.
I’m really excited for [her
new FYI channel show] Kock-
tails With Khloé. I would love to
TOP, Jonathan be on it. She has a great opinion
Simkhai. on things. She’s so witty and
SHORTS, Jennifer
Kate. EARRINGS, outspoken—it’s about time she
Kylie’s own had her own talk show.

WATCH BEHIND-THE-SCENES VIDEO FROM THE KARDASHIANS’ COVER SHOOT ON THE DIGITAL EDITION: MY.COSMOPOLITAN.COM.
O U T - O F - T H I S - W O R L D

FALL’S SCI-FI-INSPIRED
LOOKS ARE PERFECT
FOR GIRLS’ NIGHT OUT
—OR WORLD DOMINATION!

G U T T E R C R E D I T T E E K AY I N FO R M AT I O N : G U T T E R C R E D I T T E E K AY I N FO R M AT I O N W G U T T E R C R E D I T T E E K AY T E E K AY
TIME TO KICK ASS,
TAKE NAMES…WHILE
LOOKING EPIC.

B Y L O N I V E N T I
P H O T O G R A P H E D B Y A L E X E I H A Y
F A S H I O N E D I T O R : J A M E S
W O R T H I N G T O N - D E M O L E T
A S C E N D I N G
M A G E N T A
Inspo: J U P I T E R J O N E S
(played by Mila Kunis) in
Jupiter Ascending
Take the prissy out of pink
by fearlessly sweeping it
from lids to brows. Layer
fuchsia shadow over
matching cream (or apply
powder shadow wet).
Finish with black liner (try
CoverGirl Intensify Me!
Liquid Eyeliner by
LashBlast, $7) and several
coats of mascara.

DRESS, TROUSERS,
Jonathan Simkhai.
BOOTS, Dior.
EARRINGS (cone),
Armadoro Jewelry;
(hoops) Lynn Ban
Jewelry. LARGE CUFF,
Oblik Atelier. BLUE
CUFFS, Alexis Bittar.
RING, Stella & Bow

185
M O C K I N G J A Y
G E M S
Inspo: K AT NIS S E V E RD E E N
(played by Jennifer
Lawrence) in The Hunger
Games: Mockingjay, Part 2
Crystals as liner? 3, 2, 1…
eye contact! Place various-
size flat-back jewels (score
them at any craft store)
under your eyes using lash
glue, pressing each into
position for about 10
seconds.

TOP, SKIRT, Dior.


EARRINGS, Stella & Bow.
CUFF, Michelle
Campbell. RINGS,
Pamela Love
HAIR: Andre Gunn
using Jane Carter
Solution at Honey
Artists. MAKEUP: Kabuki
for Diorshow
(kabukimagic.com).
MANICURE: Julie
Kandalec for Dior
Vernis. MODEL: Shlomit
Malka/ReQuest
Models. See page 254
for shopping
information.
VEST, SKIRT, Ohne
Titel. EARRINGS
(silver), Stella &
Bow; (black) Lynn
Ban Jewelry.
ARM CUFF, Arme de
L’Amour. RINGS
(middle finger),
Giles + Bro; (ring
finger) Hidalgo

A S C E N D I N G
S K Y W A L K E R
C H E E K S
Inspo: RE Y (played by
Daisy Ridley) in Star
Wars: The Force Awakens
Neutral lovers, meet your
futuristic match: sky-high
cheekbones. Even out
your skin with foundation,
and nix shine with powder
(try Make Up For Ever HD
Microfinish Powder, $34).
To sculpt, sweep bronzer
under the apples of your
cheeks, brush up to
temples then back three
times. Last, loads of
mascara, a nude lip, and
Leia-like bubble ponies.

187
JEFFREY WESTBROOK/STUDIO D

ASCENDING MAGENTA MOCKINGJAY GEMS SKYWALKER CHEEKS SMOKY TO THE MAX


CIATÉ LONDON Lip N Mix ESTÉE LAUDER Magic Smoky Powder COVERGIRL Star Wars COVERGIRL Outlast Longwear
Pigment in Pout, $10 Shadow Stick in Cool Ash, $22 Lipstick in Jedi, $6 Lipstick in Phantom Pink, $7
COVERGIRL Queen Collection Eye COVERGIRL Star Wars Mascara in GIVENCHY Noir Couture Volume YVES SAINT LAURENT Couture Kajal
Shadow Pot in Pink Sequin, $4.49 Very Black Blaze, $6 Mascara, $33 Eyeliner in 1 Noir Ardent, $35
LANCÔME Drama Liqui-Pencil MAKE UP FOR EVER Crystal Strass #1 COVERGIRL Clean Glow Blush & CHANEL Illusion d’Ombre Long
in Macaron, $23 Diamond, $21 Bronzer in Spices, $7 Wear Luminous Eye Shadow,
in Mirifique, $36
188
DRESS, Nina
Ricci. EARRINGS,
Shaun Leane.
NECKLACES
(gold), Lele
Sadoughi;
(silver) Eddie
Borgo

A S C E N D I N G
S M O K Y T O
T H E M A X
Inspo: IM P E R ATO R F U RI O S A
(played by Charlize Theron)
in Mad Max: Fury Road
The secret to this textured eye:
a foundation sponge. Fill inner
rims and upper lids with a
black eye crayon. Then use the
sponge to dab on black cream
(like Diorshow Fusion Mono
Matte Eye Shadow in Noc­
turne, $31). Keep skin dewy
with CoverGirl Outlast Stay
Luminous Foundation, $9.79,
and add a pale pink lip.
WHAT’S THE CURE-
ALL WHEN REAL
LIFE GETS TOO,
WELL, REAL?
A GREAT ESCAPE
WITH AN EVEN
GREATER FRIEND.
PACK UP YOUR
FUNKIEST PRINTS,
KNITS, AND LAYERS:
MODELS ON THE
RISE (AND BESTIES
IRL) NADINE
LEOPOLD AND
GABBY WESTBROOK
DEMONSTRATE
HOW TO SOJOURN

DAY
IN STYLE.
ON GABBY (LEFT): JACKET, TOP,
SHORTS, Etro. BOOTS, Roger
Vivier. HAT, Stetson. ON
NADINE: JACKET, PANTS, Tory
Burch. SWEATER, Jill
Stuart. SHOES, Karen
Walker. NECKLACE, Azuni
London
OPPOSITE PAGE: COAT,
SWEATER, SKIRT, Chanel

TRIPPERS
P H O T O G R A P H E D B Y JAMES MACARI

FA S H I O N D I R E C T O R : AYA KANAI

191
“ W E KNEW WE ’D B E F RIE N D S R I G H T AW AY.

WE J UST CLICK E D.
WE SAY IT’S LIKE W E ’ VE
A LWAYS K N O W N E AC H OT H E R .” —N A D I N E

192
B E AU T Y T I P
BOLD YET BOHO:
DIOR LA COLLECTION
PRIVÉE CUIR
CANNAGE, $210,
SMELLS LIKE
A WEEKEND
ESCAPE—BOTTLED.

FROM LEFT: DRESS, PANTS,


Acne Studios. SHOES,
Laurence Dacade.
BAG, Jerome Dreyfuss.
NECKLACE, Lucky
Brand. JACKET, Off-
White c/o Virgil
Abloh. DRESS,
Salvatore Ferragamo.
SUNGLASSES, Pared
Eyewear
OPPOSITE PAGE: COAT,
DRESS, Valentino.
SHOES, Ancient Greek
Sandals. EARRINGS,
AzuniLondon
B EAUTY TIP
SCORE NADINE’S
FRESH-FACED LOOK
WITH GIORGIO
ARMANI BEAUTY
LUMINOUS SILK
COMPACT, $64.

JACKET, Maiyet. SHIRT,


Just Cavalli. SHORTS,
Rebecca Minkoff.
HAT, Stetson
OPPOSITE PAGE:
SWEATER, TOP, PANTS,
SHOES, Polo Ralph
Lauren. NECKLACE,
Pebble London
“ WE M E T O N A SHO OT I N N O RT H C AR O L I N A . W E STAY E D
TO G E THE R IN A HO U S E I N T H E W O O D S. W E W E R E TOLD

T H E RE W E R E BE A R S,
SO WE HA D TO STAY C L O S E TO E AC H OT H E R !” — G A B B Y

195
DRESS, BAG, Burberry. HAT,
Littledoe Accessories
OPPOSITE PAGE: FROM LEFT: TOP,
SKIRT, Altuzarra. EARRINGS,
BRACELETS, Pebble London.
RING, Pyrrha. COAT, The
Arrivals. TOP, PANTS, Rachel
Comey. NECKLACE, Ibu
HAIR: Martin-Christopher
Harper @Platform|NYC
using Aveda. MAKEUP: Robert
Greene using MAC at Honey
Artists. MANICURE: Shao Lu.
MODELS: Nadine Leopold/
IMG; Gabby Westbrook/The
Lions. See page 254 for
shopping information.
“N ADIN E A N D I CA N F I N D T H E
F U N IN A N Y TH I N G . T H E R E ’ S
NO F ILTE R B E TWE E N U S.
WHE N WE ’RE TO G E T H E R , I T ’ S J U ST

R AW AND R E AL.” —GABBY

197
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EDITED BY
M A RINA KHIDEKEL

Cosmo’s
50 Best
Sex Tips
Ever
YOUR SEX GAME
R O B E R T W H I T M A N / T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T. C O M

IS ABOUT TO GET SO.


MUCH. HOTTER. WE’RE
RECOUNTING OUR BEST
(OKAY, AND SOME OF
OUR CRAZIEST) SEX AND
RELATIONSHIP MOVES
FOR OUR 50TH BIRTHDAY.
CHEERS TO THAT!
BY ANNA BRE SL AW

199
c
COSMO HAS BEEN EDUCATING and empowering
women for half a century, and our sex
tips remain as fun, raunchy, and
useful as ever. “There is still so much
women don’t know about their bodies
and turn-ons,” says ob-gyn Jennifer
Ashton, MD. “Whether it’s giving
medical information or sharing new
ways to get your freak on, Cosmo’s led
the way for women to embrace their
sexuality and been a judgment-free
zone.” Sure, we’ve doled out some silly,
even infamous advice*, but way before
it was in fashion, we were unashamed
to present women’s sexual enjoyment
as something worth standing up for.
So let’s toast to that, and to you: May
we continue to help ladies break bed
frames for another 50 years.

1. R E A L T A L K : Roughly
70 percent of women need more
clitoral stimulation to O during
sex—so reach down and touch
yourself during the deed! You feel
in control of your O, and he’s
super turned on. Win-win.

2. F O R A T W I S T O N
missionary, lie on your back, and
lift your legs up and over to one
side as he enters you. Raising
your legs makes you supertight,
and the angle of your hips means
he’ll hit spots that rarely get TLC.
wrap your legs around his waist
as he enters you. Helpful hint:
The cotton cycle provides the
strongest vibrations.

5. I N R E V E R S E -cowgirl,
lean back (instead of forward
toward his feet). It’s a primo
G-spot angle for you and the
illusion of a Kardashi-ass for him.

6. T H E N U M B E R O N E
rule for a great blow job: Use your
mouth (obvs!) and your hands.
Take the head in your mouth, and
lick and swirl like you would a
?WHAT
WERE WE
THINKING?
JULY 1967
“And
remember,
there’s
nothing so
alluring as a
whiff of
perfume
wafting from
the bosom.…
Tuck a piece
of perfume-
soaked
cotton into
your bra
often.”
UPDATE
This is good
if you are
planning on
staying an
arm’s length
away from
your partner
at all times.
69 (so hard to focus!), take turns.
One person goes to town, while
the other groans and moans
about how good it feels.

8. W H I L E H E ’ S giving you
oral, have him insert a finger or
3. G E T H I M T O skip the soft-serve cone. Meanwhile, use If not, two and stroke your G-spot with
in-and-out thrusts and, uh, stir your hands to grip, squeeze, and second base a come-hither motion. Internal
will be an
with his penis instead. He’ll stim- stroke the length of his penis. and external stimulation boosts
issue.
ulate every inch of you (motion of Don’t keep up the same motion— your orgasm chances.
the ocean and all that…). variety of sensation is key!
9. LUBE UP! (Both you and your
4. S I T O N T H E E D G E 7. I N S T E A D O F pleasing partner, before and/or during The
of the washing machine, and each other simultaneously during Naughty.) Almost 50 percent of

*SEE: THE GREAT SCRUNCHIE INCIDENT OF ’06, P. 204


LOVE LUST

13 Vintage Cosmo Tip,


June 1972
“ALL WOMEN SHOULD TRY FOR
A L I T T L E M O R E V A R I E T Y… A
LIT TLE MORE SHOCK VALUE .
PUT ON A WIG. OR GREET YOUR
M A N AT T H E D O O R W IT H A
MARTINI IN YOUR HAND AND
NOTHING ON BUT HIGH HEEL S.”
OUR 2015 ROAD TEST
Naked except for black Manolos and a
long blonde wig very unlike my curly
brown hair, I was already three “test”
martinis deep when I wobbled to the door
and greeted R.M.P. (Reluctant Male Par-
women say lube makes it easier to 11. U S U A L L Y G E T ticipant, aka my boyfriend of almost two
orgasm. And forget the myth that oral with your legs spread? years). First, he seemed surprised, then
it’s only for older women—all the Intensify your O by stretching slightly scared. But with some R-rated
RANKIN/ TRUNK ARCHIVE. COT TON: GET T Y IMAGES.

cool kids are doing it! your legs straight out, stimulating coaxing, I could tell he was getting into
the pelvic muscles you use to it. After we had sex, he gave me puppy-
10. I F Y O U H A V E N O climax. It’s a crazy-good new dog eyes. “Can you take that wig off now?”
clue whether your partner’s sensation. “Nooo, this girl is fun, I like this girl!” I
dirty-talk meter is set to “a little replied. Did I mention I’d had three mar-
naughty” or “downright filthy,” 12. G E N T L Y H O L D tinis? “Wasn’t it hot cheating on your
do a sneaky little test. Ask, his face still, tell him to stop girlfriend with a blonde?” I asked. He
“What would you like me to do moving, and let him simply shrugged and shook his head: “I missed
to you? Details, please.” And see receive your kisses for a minute. my girlfriend.” Then we ordered burgers,
what words he uses and how That way, whether you like it and I kept my wig on while I ate mine.
risqué he’s willing to get. Then slow or hot and heavy, he’ll know
follow his lead. how to kiss you back.

NOVEMBER 2015 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ 201


LOVE LUST
14. J U S T S T A R T E D alone can sometimes trigger an O 29. W H I L E pleasuring him
dating? Set the precedent and (and it feels amazing for a guy too). with your mouth, bring his hand
make sure you come first. Women down to touch you. Cover his
often focus on their guy’s orgasm 22. T H E S H O W E R is fingers with yours so you can
and treat themselves as an made for the quickie. The ideal make sure his touches are
afterthought. Since we’re all position for you is bent over, exactly what you need to climax.
creatures of habit, doing the aiming the showerhead at your It’ll arouse him even more to

?
reverse pays off in the long run. hot spot while he’s doing his thing see you taking control of his
from behind. No removable movements.
15. A S K H I M to trace his showerhead? Slick his fingers
tongue over your thin-skinned with shower gel, and have him 30. L E A D with a compliment
spots: wrists, inner knees, behind reach around and give you some (“I love the way you…”) before
your ears. It’ll make you shiver. digital pleasure. suggesting a new move (“it would

16. W H I L E S T A N D I N G
WHAT 23. C R E A T E A secret code
turn me on so much if you used
your fingers like this…”).
with your back against his chest, WERE WE that translates to sexy-times.
have him reach around and touch THINKING? Maybe “get me a dirty martini” 31. T U R N U P the tease
you so all you can see are his MARCH 1998
means “let’s blow this joint…and factor by letting him enter you for
hands all over you—totally sexy. then each other.” a hot second, then going straight
“A new, soft
back into your foreplay of choice.
toothbrush is
17. W R A P Y O U R fingers an incredible 24. R E M I N D yourself how Think of it as giving him a taste of
in an “O” shape around the base sex toy. Ask much you turn him on. Seeing his the main course during cocktail
of his shaft, and move them in your man to face as he’s lost in ecstasy—and hour. It’ll leave him hungry—no,
tandem with your mouth. Use run the realizing you’re making it salivating—for more.
lots of saliva to ease the bristles over happen—can be the push you
movement, and he won’t be able your breasts need to cross the finish line. 32. G E T S E X O N T H E
to tell where your mouth ends and entire brain by reading a steamy book
and your hand begins. Gently cup body—the 25. T O U C H yourself— before a date. You’ll feel more
his balls with your other hand sensation is beneath your bath jets, while sensual during the deed as you
truly erotic.
and you’re golden. watching Scandal, whatever visualize a hot story line. And he
He should
brush gently works for you—to get to know never has to know!
18. T R Y T H E “commercial around your what sensations do it for you. Are
sex” game. Start getting it on vaginal you into counterclockwise clitoral 33. H A V E Y O U R guy
during the commercials of your area.” strokes? Nipple stimulation? Find scribble down a “menu” of the top
favorite show, then untangle as UPDATE out—then bring your favorite three moves that drive him crazy,
soon as the show comes back. moves to your next sex session. and you do the same. Then swap
This is the
Sexy show? Copy their moves. As kind of sex lists, and take turns serving up
you graduate from make-outs to move that 26. A D V A N C E D blow-job the goods à la carte!
oral to intercourse (and back?), can quickly move: Twist your hand as you
the teasing will be out of control. move your mouth up and down 34. P E R F E C T Y O U R
R O B E R T W H I T M A N / T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T. C O M . T O O T H B R U S H : G E T T Y I M A G E S .
lead you to
wonder his shaft like you’re tracing the striptease. Stage an entrance
19. K E E P Y O U R dress on where your grooves of a corkscrew, and slide from another room, take a
or just push your underwear aside life has gone it over his tip each time you get to sensual walk around him, and
to have sex. The immediacy of wrong. On it. He’ll worship you. slowly shed a slip to reveal a
keeping clothes on is hot—like the bright corset. (Or a thong and nipple
side, if you
you can’t wait to have each other. 27. W A N T M O R E oral and tassels! Whatever’s your jam.) By
happen to
possess less jackhammer but can’t seem the time you finally straddle him,
20. T H E H O L E A T the tip vagina to say so? Start out with a sext. you’ll both be raring to go. P.S.
of his penis is called the meatus, dentata, this Type “I can’t stop thinking about Leave on your heels for extra sass.
which is the worst name given to tip promotes your mouth on me tonight,”
anything, ever. (Meatus!) But it’s excellent throw in a kiss emoji, and hit 35. S W I T C H I N G hot and
sensitive during arousal. With hygiene. Send. The message will be cold sensations feels amazing for
your tongue, apply medium received. him during oral. If you’re not into
pressure on and off. He’ll be the ol’ ice-cube-in-the-cheek
shocked it feels so good! 28. B R I N G A bullet vibrator trick, try alternating oral with
to bed. The Rabbit gets all the drinking something cold or
21. W H E N Y O U ’ R E glory, but using a bullet vibe on warm. Even easier: Lightly blow
close to climaxing, tighten and your clit during doggie is a total air over him after having had him
relax like you’re Kegeling. This game changer. in your mouth.

202 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


36
Vintage Cosmo Tip, March 1989
“ U N L E A S H YO U R IM AG IN ATI O N : YO U MI G H T D RI V E D OW N T O
THE LOCAL LOVERS’ L ANE LIKE TEENAGERS OR SWAP
HOUSE S WITH A FRIEND AND MA KE LOVE IN HER BEDRO OM.”
OUR 2015 ROAD TEST
We didn’t go to lovers’ lane because where even is that, but non-bedroom sex
is one of those things I always mean to do but never get around to. I finally
got around to it—although we kept it low-key and only ventured as far as the
desk. Funny thing about adulthood: Spontaneous desk sex is hot, but clear-
ing the desk beforehand in order to avoid any postcoital broken tchotchkes or
destroyed tea rose arrangements is not. Ditto when R.M.P. paused the action
to put a pillow under my back. Ultimately, the desk lends itself best to doggie-
style—but R.M.P. and I did thoroughly enjoy giving the bed a break.
LOVE LUST
37. A G R E A T G I Z M O
for scoring some dual pleasure?
A vibrating penis ring. Your guy
will enjoy a soft vibration on
his shaft while you get bonus

?
targeted clitoral stimulation
with each of his thrusts. It also
helps guys achieve fuller,
harder erections.

38. L O N G - D I S TA N C E ?
Send him a care package for his… WHAT
package. Fill a box with some
sexy new lingerie, lube, and
WERE WE
maybe a sex toy, and send it to his THINKING?
front door with this note: “We’ll NOVEMBER 2006
need this on my next visit.” “Stack six
scrunchies
39. N O T B E I N G “allowed” on his
to make any noise during sex can package.
be a huge turn-on, especially Then
when something feels so good, remove, one

46
you just want to express it! Try by one, using
your lips. As
this for a spin: Stuff your thong
each is
or his tie into his mouth, then do removed, it
dirty, dirty things to him until releases
he’s digging his nails into his pressure in
palms to keep from ripping that his penis,
gag out. which makes
his orgasm
40. A G R E A T couple habit more
to get into is to kiss every day—for intense. Cosmo Vintage Tip,
October 2002
more than just a couple of Plus, the
movement of
seconds. It wards off the perilous
the fabric
roommate effect, especially if you will feel wild “CHECK YOUR
live together and lately have been on his skin.” IN HIBITI O N S AT T H E
spending more time doing chores D O O R , A N D WAT C H
UPDATE
together than checking each 43. P U T A P I L L O W EACH OTHER WHILE
other out. In the early or two under your butt to elevate TOUCHING
aughts, we YO U RS E LV E S .”
your hips during missionary
suggested
41. G E T T I N G B U S Y some crazy sex—and up the odds of his OUR 2015 ROAD TEST
in a public place is a huge risk, sh*t. We’ve hitting your G-spot. This will Now that R.M.P. and I have
thereby doubling the wattage of dialed it back change your life, we swear. been banging on the regs
your hot rendezvous. Your best since then. for a while, like many long-
bet to pulling it off is to keep your Scrunchies 44. F O R L A D I E S only: term couples, our orgasms
clothes on (wear a skirt and no may be Have your partner lie on her are pretty wham-bam-let’s-
undies for easier access) and valuable hair side, propping herself up watch-Netflix. We rarely
do it in a place where you’ll hear accessories on her elbow, and straddle one take the time to stop and
someone coming, like in the but aren’t of her legs so your clits rub smell the sex roses, and
the best mix
middle of a stairwell—the together, all the while making thanks to the logistics of
with his
footsteps on the stairs will tip you crotch. eye contact. Grind on. our favorite respective posi-
off that it’s time to get moving Scissoring’s a classic for a tions, we rarely see each
before you get caught. reason. other’s O faces. Sitting on
opposite edges of the bed,
42. T H E C H E R R Y on top 45 . L E S T W E (and he) me with my fave bullet vibe,
when it comes to an amazing BJ? forget, the clitoris extends down him with just his hand, felt
Eye contact. Give a wink or some our labia in the shape of a pretty voyeuristic—in a hot
smize action, and he’ll be putty in wishbone. So he should lick or way—and I definitely felt
your…mouth. stroke the labia—not just the closer to him afterward.

204 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


Vintage
Beefcake
BURT REYNOLDS OPENS UP ABOUT
BEING THE FIRST DUDE WITH THE
BALLS TO NEARLY SHOW HIS BALLS
IN A BEST-SELLING WOMEN’S MAG.
ONE NIGHT EARLY in 1972, after Deliverance was
in the can but before it was released, I was on
The Tonight Show with Helen Gurley Brown, the
longtime editor of Cosmopolitan and author of
the best-selling book Sex and the Single Girl.
During a commercial break, she invited me to be
the first male nude centerfold of the magazine.
Although no one had ever shown a naked
man in a magazine before, Helen believed
women have the same “visual appetites” as men,
who’d been looking at naked women in Playboy
since 1953. She wanted the same prerogative for
women. It would be a milestone in the sexual
revolution, and she said I was the one man who
could pull it off. I found out later she’d asked
Paul Newman first, but he turned her down.
Helen didn’t have to talk me into it. I was
flattered and intrigued. I wish I could say that I
wanted to show my support for women’s rights,
but I just thought it would be fun. I said yes
before we came back on the air. (I may or may
not have had several cocktails in the greenroom
before the show.)

ON THE WAY to the photo shoot, I stopped for two


quarts of vodka and finished one before we got
clit—while he’s down there. action off with your vibe’s lowest to the studio, which was freezing cold (bad for a
Hell-O! setting and then slowly increase naked man’s self-esteem).
the intensity as his arousal The famed Francesco Scavullo photo-
47. A F T E R A S H O W E R , grows. graphed me on a bearskin rug. He took hun-
get him to take you from behind dreds of shots: with a hat in front of my…
while you’re leaning over the 49. R O T A T E F R O M tallywacker, with a dog in front of it, with my
bathroom sink and looking at girl-on-top position into reverse- hand in front of it. (If I was trying to prove
your hot, wet self in the fogged-up cowgirl (take your time—you’ll something, why would I cover it up with my
mirror. You’ll get a front-row view avoid any crazy mishaps, plus a hand? I have very small hands.) They promised
to all the seriously hot action and slo-mo approach just looks that to burn the outtakes and give me the negatives.
none of the stress of filming it. much sexier). Not only are The magazine hit the stands in April 1972,
Nice! you hitting a series of new hot three months before Deliverance opened, and
spots for both of you with each quickly sold all 1.5 million copies.
GET T Y IMAGES. SCRUNCHIE: ISTOCK.

48. A S K H I M F I R S T , different angle, but he’ll dig


but if he gives you the green the 360-degree view of your
light, hold a small vibrator gorgeous bod.
against the underside of his
shaft or on his perineum— 50. B O R E D O F the
that’s the super nerve-packed same old sexts? Been there. Try
area that lies between his keeping it simple. The hottest
balls and his butt—while you’re possible text you can send: “I
going down on him. Start the need you now.”

FROM BUT ENOUGH ABOUT ME, BY BURT REYNOLDS


AND JON WINOKUR, OUT NOVEMBER 17 (PUTNAM)
LOVE LUST

“I Saw
the
Signs”
YOU BOTH HATE TECHNO MUSIC AND SHARE A
LOVE OF DARK AND STORMYS. ARE THESE
OMENS THAT YOUR RELATIONSHIP IS MEANT TO
BE? WRITER SLOANE CROSLEY WEIGHS IN.

i it ’ s easy to feel cinematic


about relationships. Mov-
ies—and novels and pop
songs, for that matter—have
conditioned us to put our
past loves into plot-shaped
buckets filled with unmis-
takable signs that he was or
was not the one. In our pop
culture haze of meet-cutes
and meet-quicks (I’m talk-
ing to you, Tinder), we’ve
fetishized any minor indica-
tion that a relationship will
or will not work. He loves
me because he programmed
the perfect ringtone into my
phone! It’s fate because he’s
wearing the T-shirt of my
favorite sports team! The
ne plus ultra example of this
has to be the 1992 movie Sin-
gles, in which an entire plot-
line revolves around Bridget
Fonda trying to get Matt Dil-
lon to say “Bless you” when
she sneezes.
I have been in one or two
of these “Bless you” relation-
ships myself. Okay, four.
Five. A hard six. But out of
all of them, Alex was the
best. And by best, of course, I
mean the worst.
I dated Alex (not his
real name) for four months,
which is the exact right
amount of time to do some
real emotional damage to
yourself while, in hindsight,
realizing the other person
was a blip on your radar
screen. We met on a writ-
ers’ retreat in the woods,
where, in addition to physi-
cal attraction, we bonded
over an appreciation of The-
lonious Monk and a mutual
love of Orangina bottles.
Obviously, there are many
depths to plunge when get-
ting to know another per-
son. But understanding each
other’s references is not one
of them. It’s an entryway to a
room, not the room. At best,
the stray commonalities are
symbols of great things yet to
emerge. At worst, they’re the
side effect of being born the
same year.
But because I met Alex in
a cloistered, idyllic environ-
ment as close to The Bach-
elorette as I’ll ever come, I
ignored all that. I actually
amped up the importance of
signs because signs were all
I had. Our time together was
partially public and spent
discussing other people’s
novels and trying to one-up
each other with witticisms.
Going any deeper threat-
ened to put too fine a point
on the budding relation-

206 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


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LOVE LUST
ship in progress. Therefore, ful relationship. But looking
cultural similarities became back, I wish I’d cut this one
our foundation as Alex and I off at the pass, back when he
flirted, built up a well of pri- was flaking out, showing lit-
vate jokes, and spent the last tle interest in getting to know
evening of the retreat in my me. Searching for superfi-
room. cial signs distracted me from
What followed were real questions I should have
weeks of marathon phone been asking about character
conversations between him and kindness, about sensi-
in Los Angeles and me in bility and sensitivity. And
New York. We saw each even at the micro level? My
other when we were in our search was moony and myo-
respective cities as well, pic. There were plenty of
but already, out in the real moments when our interests
world, some of the magic diverged, but I chose not to
was fading. He wasn’t, in see them as signs that Alex
rom-com parlance, “letting was totally wrong for me.
me in.” Still, I held out hope. A year ago, I found myself
I ignored his delayed text in Alex’s neighborhood in
replies and mixed messages L.A. with a few hours to kill.
in favor of our shared disdain I was in the kind of sublimely
for rice pudding. Then just as good mood that makes you
I was at the end of my emo- want to hug people you don’t
tional rope, a piece of assur- even like. Plus, I was dating
ance came in the form of a a fantastic guy by then (one
grand invitation. He asked
me to spend a week by our-

And yet, I chose the


selves at his grandmother’s
house in Cape Cod, adding line appeared in Alex’s
that he “didn’t invite just any-
one.” Did I note how he made
in-box. Since we do more or
less the same thing, I have romantic version of
no plans to come stay with a good read on what con- us over the awkward
us in front of me.”
me in New York and seemed stitutes pressing and what
totally uncurious about me doesn’t. Still, I said noth-
unless we were talking about ing when he disappeared to
him? Nope. I bought a semi- work, comforting myself with

P R E V I O U S PA G E : K R I S T I N M C K E E / S T O C K S Y. T H I S PA G E : B E N G O L D S T E I N / S T U D I O D ; K AT B O R C H A R T/
sheer shirt and borrowed a the movie-perfect romance a YouTube video, a mash- who shares only about 30
friend’s car. of our first days together, up of movies with ’80s mall percent of my pop culture
When we got into bed assuming that was some- scenes. He had watched it DNA). So I texted Alex to see
that first night, he abruptly how real and the present “like, 30 times already.” if he wanted to grab coffee.
announced he was sick of was false. I took walks to the “Okay,” I said, “I feel like I Maybe we could be friends.
having relationships not beach by myself. I worked should go.” He replied 36 hours later,
work out. I agreed. There- on my novel at his grand- “Yeah,” he replied, looking as I was boarding my flight
fore, he concluded, “I don’t mother’s dining room table, only mildly displeased. “I just home, to say: “At hospital
want to keep sleeping with a china clock on the mantel have so much to do.” watching baby monitor.”
women unless it’s the woman ticking off the hours. When Alex walked me to my “Well,” I said to myself
I’m really going to be with.” I couldn’t stand the casual friend’s car, where we made and shrugged, “at least he’s
“Totally,” I whispered, abandonment any longer, I no plans to see each other having sex again.”
as he shuffled himself to the knocked on his door frame. again. If we kissed, I don’t I typed in “Bless you” and
other side of the bed. “Want to see something remember it. If he had a rea- watched the cursor blink for
Now I doubt anyone who cool?” he asked, warmly. son for inviting me out there, a moment. Then I erased
knows me would categorize I did. I wanted a sign that I’ll never know what it was. the letters and flew back to a
me as a doormat. More like the knot in my stomach was My friends who know this place where I was loved. ■
T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T. C O M .

whatever the opposite of a for nothing. I wanted to have story tell me that I shouldn’t
doormat is—a doorbell? And a conversation with him not be embarrassed. He should.
yet, I chose the romantic ver- about cult films or books— I had hope, they say. Sloane Crosley is
the author of the
sion of us over the awkward what better place to start And manners. And they best-selling essay
us in front of me. than with his own writing? are mostly correct. collection I Was Told
There’d Be Cake. Her
A few sexless mornings “Check this out.” He spun Quite often, all those fun first novel, The Clasp,
later, a pressing work dead- around his computer. It was signs give way to a wonder- is out now.

208 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


ask
him
any-
thing
Q/ AFTER A LOT
O F TA L K I N G , M Y
EX AND I ARE
B AC K T O G E T H E R .
BUT I’ V E BA D -
M O U T H E D HIM TO
A LL M Y FRIENDS.
H OW D O I G E T
Q / I’ve been having Q / I met this fantas- T H E M B AC K O N bad.” Don’t pretend

C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P L E F T: B E T H S T U D E N B E R G / T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T. C O M ; J A K E
amazing sex with this tic guy, but the first B OA R D W I T H M Y that suddenly
guy, but his apart- time we had sex, it R E L AT I O N S H I P
sucked. Will it get
everything is okay,
ment is a disgusting
hovel. How do I get better, or should I AND MAKE because your friends
him to come only to cut and run? A L L PA R T I E S know nobody has a
my place without A Sex often sucks the C O M F O R TA B L E perfect relationship.
offending him?
first time, so if he’s LOVE H A NGING OUT ? Ultimately, their
A Why be subtle when really fantastic, sleep ADVICE FROM feelings won’t
his mess is obvious? with him again and see A Your friends have change because of
Just tell him you’d if it was an off night.
OUR GUY good reason to be what you say—
rather hang at your If that’s not so great GURU, LOGAN protective: They
C H E S S U M ; P E T E R DA Z E L E Y/G E T T Y I M AG E S .

they’ll need to see


place. If he asks why, either, but you really HILL don’t want to see you’re happy. No
don’t be mean, but be like him? Hook up a you get hurt again. matter how
clear: Your apartment third time to be sure.
Confront their awkward it feels,
can pass a health Desire is complicated,
and sex often gets
doubts head on. keep setting up
inspection; his can’t.
Most guys won’t take better the better you Say: “Look, I know I those group hangs.
it personally. You’re know each other. But said he was the If they see firsthand
not trashing him, if it doesn’t improve, Antichrist, but I was that he’s treating
you’re trashing his cut bait, because angry because the you well, they’ll
trashy apartment. chemistry matters. breakup hurt so come around.

210 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


LOVE LUST
Q/ I H AV E A L L T H E S E F L I R T Y
M E S S AG I NG T H R E A D S ON DAT I NG
A PP S , A N D T H E Y N E V E R G O
A N Y W H E RE ONC E I S UG G E S T TA K I NG
I T OF F L I N E . A M I D OI NG I T W RONG?

A It’s not you, it’s the app. Online, most


people never follow through. But to up your
odds, try this: (1) Put a note in your profile
that says, “I’m not here to make friends
online. I want to meet IRL.” (2) When you’re
chatting, set a time limit, like 20 minutes or
10 messages, and stick to it. When you hit
your limit, tell him if he wants to chat, you’d
rather do it over a cocktail. (3) Don’t wait
for guys to ask you out. Just suggest a time
and place you’d like to meet in person.

Q / I’m 22, and I Q / My boyfriend


have never had a and I have a great
girlfriend. I have relationship, but
a huge crush on he’s divorced. He
this personal trainer confessed that he
at my gym and I thinks he’ll always
really want to start be partly in love
flirting with her, with his ex-wife. Is
but I feel totally that a bad sign for
BOYFRIEND
clueless. What our future?
VS. BFFS: THE can I say to get her
ETERNAL A It’s not a great sign,
attention?
DILEMMA.
but I wouldn’t say it’s a
A My favorite pick-up dead end. He may need
line is basically the more time or just chose
name-tag sticker: the wrong words.
“Hello, my name is Many divorced guys
.” That’s usually have mixed feelings
all it takes to let some- that are hard for them
one know that you’re to express. It’s good
interested in her. he’s open with you, so
Q / I’m about to move down the line:
Beyond that, remem- just proceed with cau-
move in with my Are you going to split
ber that you’re not the tion. Those feelings
guy, but it’s for household chores
money reasons— first person to crush may keep fading until
50/50 or split up the
I don’t feel one hun- on a hot trainer—and they’re gone alto-
tasks? And so on. I
dred percent ready. she’s probably not sup- gether—time will tell.
know this isn’t
Are there things I posed to flirt at work.
can do to get romantic, but that’s
Make some small talk
through this with the point. The more
and ask for some
minimal fights? tedious stress you
workout tips if you’d
eliminate now, the
A Get the practical like, but most impor-
more time you’ll
stuff out of the way tant, focus on getting
have to make out
early. Make a list of her out of the gym
later. Then you
the things that worry as soon as possible
may wind up lov-
you, and hash them (suggest she join you
ing the fact that
out together. Since for a protein shake…
you two jumped
money is an issue, or something stiffer).
on the shacking-
start there: How will Trainers aren’t so
up bandwagon a
you split the bills? high on procrastina-
little early.
Who pays for grocer- tors, so be bold and Hill is a contributing
ies? How about his just do it. writer for Cosmopolitan
and Cosmopolitan.com.
beer budget? Then

S E N D Y O U R G U Y- R E L AT E D D I L E M M A T O A S K H I M A N Y T H I N G @ C O S M O P O L I TA N . C O M .
Sex Q&A
No-BS responses to questions you can only ask Cosmo

Q / My guy wants LUBE


to take Viagra NOOB?
WE’RE
before we have HERE TO
GLIDE
sex, but he YOU.
doesn’t actually
have problems
getting it up. Q / I want to try
What should I lube for the first
expect exactly? time, but I’m Q / I’ve been
A / Your man may confused. Are we known to
have seen Zac supposed to use
Efron casually postpone a
popping Viagra in
it on him or me… shower after
that one movie, but or both of us? SoulCycle. If I let
taking an erectile A / When it comes my boyfriend go
dysfunction pill, to lube, it’s tough
especially when he to slip up (get it?)! down on me
doesn’t need it, Plus, it makes sex before I have a
won’t necessarily more comfortable, chance to wash
give him stronger or especially if you’re up, be honest,
longer erections. not as wet as you will he notice a
And some ED want to be—
meds, like Cialis, anything from smell?
E -M A IL YOUR SE X
can stay in his sys- hormonal changes A / He might.
QU E ST IONS TO SE XQ A NDA
tem for 36 hours, to stress can cause Because where
@ C O S M O P O L I TA N . C O M .
giving him easy dryness down there are sweat
hard-ons the whole there, says Aviva glands, hair, and a
time. So unless Romm, MD, who bike seat…there’s
you’re planning a specializes in usually odor. The
long weekend family medicine shower-free solu-
away—and filling and obstetrics—or tion? Stash some Q / I know I need
the trunk exclu- if he finishes too alcohol-free baby to ask the guy
sively with lube— fast because of wipes in your gym I’m dating if he’s
tell him to nix the too much friction. bag. (Gentle been tested
Rx. “Popping Start by rubbing a Q / I always wind Erector! Orgasm makeup remover
before we have
Viagra when he small amount—a up being the one Man!—and wipes work in a
doesn’t need it is a teaspoon or so—in applaud the moves pinch too!) A quick sex, but when
terrible idea,” says your hands. From moving us to new he’s done before wipe (from front to am I supposed to
sex therapist Barry there, you could positions and that you’ve liked, back) will also bring that up
McCarthy, PhD. touch yourself or directing the show. says sex educator decrease your risk
without it being
“Mostly because it give him a HJ, then How do I tell him Emily Nagoski, of getting a yeast
reinforces the move right to the PhD, author of or bacterial infec- super awkward?
notion that good main event.
that sometimes I Come as You Are. tion, both of which A / Dropping a
sex is totally depen- Important: If you’re want to take a Say, “I love when thrive in warm, “Hey, you wanna
dent on his penis.” using lube over a backseat and just you’re the one who moist environ- get burgers…oh,
And since he condom, never use enjoy for a changes positions. ments like post- and have you
doesn’t have a oil-based formulas, change? Let’s try that workout spandex, been tested for
problem in that which erode latex. again.” Sure, it’s says ob-gyn STIs?” in the early
area anyway, Dr. Romm likes A / Start by taking one more time Sherry Ross, MD. stages can be
you’d be better off Sustain’s organic, the lead…of the you’ll have to guide After that, you’ll slightly uncom-
spending your water-based lubes conversation. Tell him, but after that, be good to keep fortable. Suggest
time getting it on ($13, sustain him he’s a sex let him take you the endorphin rush that you get
without the meds. condoms.com). superhero—The up, up, and away! going. tested together at

212 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


YOU COULD
JUST SHOWER
WITH HIM…

be beautiful this
a clinic such as SEX TOY WHAT THE BEST SEX
OF THE
Planned TOY…THAT’S A TOTAL
Parenthood, says CLASSIC? Before holiday season
sex therapist Neil MONTH there were bunny
Cannon, PhD, and
if he’s hesitant, ears and bullet
S T U A R T T Y S O N / S T U D I O D . F R O M L E F T: J U L I E N C E L I C E / G E T T Y

remind him that vibes, ladies in the


it will make sex “OH, THIS? know reached for
better for you IT’S FOR MY…
ACHY BACK.” the Magic Wand Exclusive IntelliFlex®
both. If he balks, ($125, babeland
bolt. Or if you’ve bristles gently detangle
recently been .com), a “personal
IMAGES; JANE T KIMBER /GE T T Y IMAGES.

tested, play a massager” meant hair. No snags, pulls or


quick game of for sore back pain. Just healthier
“I’ll show you my muscles—before
clean report if more beautiful hair.
everyone caught on
you show me to its other, more
yours.” Afterward,
pleasurable use. It’s
go celebrate
your responsible cordless now, but
selves with those trust us: It still gives
burgers. the OG orgasms of
—JULIE VADNAL the 1968 one.
BEAUTIFUL STARTS HERE.
thewetbrush.com
manthropo
YOUR GUIDE TO THE MALE BRAIN

GOOD VIBES

BOYS AND THEIR (SEX) TOYS


Not all toys resemble big penises.
But not all dudes know that. Four guys
took some alternatives for a spin.

Kandi Kisses
$59, bedroomkandi.com
INITIAL REACTION: “A vibrating Crave Duet
lipstick? Wait, what’s really $149, lovecrave.com
in girls’ purses?” INITIAL REACTION: “Looks
more like a tuning fork, but
VERDICT: “Pleasantly sur-
the USB charging is cool.”
prised. She propped it
between us during girl-on- VERDICT: “It worked well…for
top. Electrifying!” —SAM S., 27 my girlfriend. It’s more of a
solo toy.” —MIKE H., 28

I Rub My Duckie Minna Limon


$33, babeland.com $119, minnalife.com
INITIAL REACTION: “Very
INITIAL REACTION: “How do I
discreet! We can keep it in grip it?”
the shower.”
VERDICT: “I liked when my
VERDICT: “I used it on my
GF buzzed it on my balls,
wife’s clit, and she had her but it made our hands
first O in doggie! Hoping numb. And turning it off
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THE BRO - CI A L NET WORK

WHAT TURNS GUYS ON (AND OFF) ON SOCIAL MEDIA


Turns out, he does care about more than just your sexy pics.
BY EMILY C. JOHNSON
T U R N - O N S , B Y P E R C E N TAG E O F M E N T U R N - O F F S , B Y P E R C E N TAG E O F M E N

58% 50% 46% 45% 65% 49% 46% 35%


PICS POSTS VACAY POSTS. INSTAS OF AIRING A REQUEST TOO MANY LOADS OF
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GUYS. SCHUMER. HAPPEN! SKILLS! BRUNCH. STALK TOO. BE OKAY. #IT #IS?

214 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


logy
THE HUSSTLE

FIVE SIGNS THAT HE’S


ACTUALLY TOXIC
If these are familiar, you need an exit strategy.
Dating expert Matthew Hussey explains.

You’re Afraid to Bring He Makes You Look


Up Problems Stupid in Front of
Because every time you Other People
do, he comes at you with At parties, he boosts
an insult designed to his own ego by making
knock your self-esteem. you look like an idiot.
The result? You’re a The thing is, listening
professional to him critique your ROA D SIGNS
pronunciation of quinoa
DECODE HIS GLOVE COMPARTMENT
eggshell-walker.
is fun cocktail chatter for
H U S S E Y: JA K E C H E S S U M . C A R : T I M PA N N E L L /C O R B I S I M AG E S . S E X T OY S : C O U R T E S Y C O M PA N I E S . D O R I T O S : I S T O C K . A L L O T H E R S : G E T T Y I M AG E S ( 7 ).

“I’m Sorry” Isn’t Part no one.


of His Vocabulary Riding shotgun in a guy’s car is like sneaking a peek
We all make mistakes, He’s Distant When at the pistons firing...inside his brain.
only he doesn’t...ever. You’re Winning and BY GENEVIEVE SCARANO
He spins the “logic” in Loving When You’re
every convo so it’s you Crying
who is in the wrong. When you get a promo-
Even when you know tion, he’ll groan, “So now
you’re right. Which you can be even more of a
makes you feel like the slave to that company?” Leatherman Tool and Doritos Bags Tangled USB Cords
crazy one. (For the He’s intimidated by you at Flashlight To his credit, he knows One for the stereo, iPhone,
This handy man knows his not to drive while tablet, and GPS means
record, you’re not.) your strongest, so he tries way around a toolbox and hangry. Just don’t wear that he never runs out of
to keep you at your is prepared for anything. white pants in his car (neon juice. But all that tech could
He Won’t Tell You weakest. But when you’re He’ll be clutch when the orange streaks = not a distract him from you—
He’s Hurt, He’ll Just upset, he’s sweet—since Zombie Apocalypse strikes. good look). and, oh yeah, the road.
Get You Back he feels important again.
If he thinks you were The right man applauds
flirting with someone, he your potential, he doesn’t
won’t say he’s bothered stifle it.
by it. Instead, he’ll just Condoms Weed Crumpled-Up Oil
make sure you see him Remember that steamy Maybe he just lights Change Receipts
flirting with another backseat scene in up once in a while, but His baby runs well (good
Titanic? So does this guy.
B R O - C I A L N E T W O R K S O U R C E : M AT C H S I N G L E S I N A M E R I C A 2 014 S U R V E Y.

woman. He’ll always opt nonchalantly leaving sign!), but does anyone
Sex in tight spaces is no evidence in the car involves need Jiffy Lube receipts
for getting your attention
prob for him. questionable judgment— from 2012? #Hoarder
by hurting you rather maybe from all the weed?
than telling you what

25
he’s feeling. Not. Cool.

T H E P E R C E N TA G E
OF MEN WHO’ VE
FOR MORE OF G O T T E N I T O N AT
MATTHEW’S DATING
THE OFFICE .
SECRETS, VISIT
HOWTOGETTHEGUY SOMEONE WIPE
.COM. D OW N T H AT C O U C H
IN RECEPTION, K?
SOURCE: 2013 ELITE SINGLES SURVEY
LIVE IT UP! EDITED BY
J U L I E VA D N A L

This cake topper


says it all ($7,
merimeri.com).
And those tiny
gold stars?
They’re edible
glitter!

You
Say It’s
Your
Birthday?
F O O D S T Y L I S T: J A M I E K I M M . P R O P S T Y L I S T: A L M A M E L E N D E Z .

IT’S OUR BIRTHDAY


TOO! SO LET’S ALL
CELEBRATE TOGETHER
WITH A PARTY YOU’LL
WANT TO THROW
ALL YEAR LONG.

PHOTO G R A PHED BY BEN G OL DST EIN 217


LIVE IT UP! HOSTESS HACK
A big punch bowl
means everyone
can serve them-
selves. Phew!
($50, cb2.com)

Who Doesn’t Love


a Little Sparkle?
Okay, a lot of sparkle. Starting with
your shimmery, Instagram-worthy
cake! Take a store-bought one (ours is
from Baked NYC), and customize it
with the works: edible glitter stars,
sparklers, and candles. Then offer up
a pink punch, gobs of candy, and
stacks of champagne and you’ve got
yourself an unforgettable girls’ night—
even if it’s no one’s actual birthday.

SUGAR RUSH
Set out small
bowls filled with
rock candy and
other treats ($9
for 10, nuts.com).

I T W O N ’ T S TA I N
YOUR DRE S S ,
PROMISE !

BRYANT PARK
PUNCH
Combine 4 oz. fresh-squeezed
lemon juice (from 5 lemons),
4 oz. raspberry syrup, 2 oz.
yellow Chartreuse, 4 oz.
St. Germain liqueur, 8 oz. fino
sherry, and 8 oz. Tanqueray
No. Ten gin into a mixing bowl.
Add 6 oz. of ice water, strained
of any ice bits. Whisk until
frothy. Pour into a punch bowl;
add large ice cubes (which melt
slowly). Garnish with lemon
wheels and raspberries.
From mixologist Leo Robitschek at
NYC’s The NoMad Bar

MAKE SOME
NOISE
The most perfect
Snapchat props
ever? ($7 for 6,
merimeri.com)
218
LIVE IT UP! PUCKER UP
Kiss your cur-
rent sour fave
UM, YUM good-bye ($7 for
Strawberry 3.6 oz., sugar
cheesecake = fina.com).
dessert in a jelly
bean ($9 for SIP
1 lb., nuts.com).
IN STYLE
Get Your
HOW TO
BUILD THE
C H A M PA G N E

Wonka On TOW E R
OF YOUR
DRE AMS

SWIRL TIME
A killer candy buffet is all 1. Gather 30
Fill a tall vase with CLINK, CLINK!
about an even ratio of gummies, coupes.
a bouquet of sours, and hard candies, says (Plastic ones
Cheers to cham- work great,
Whirly Pops ($2.50 pagne bubble Dylan Lauren of Dylan’s Candy
each, dylans and they
candybar.com).
gummies ($7 for Bar. And don’t overthink come in
3.9 oz., sugarfina
.com).
how you display them. 32-packs!)
Because as Lauren says: 2. Make a
“It won’t last long!” 4-by-4 square
with 16
glasses, and
pour
champers
TWISTED SISTER into each.
Add crunch with Top with a
strawberry pret- 9-glass
zels ($6 for 1 lb., square; pour.
nuts.com). Top with 4
more; pour.
SWEET HEARTS 3. Top with 1
PRETTY IN PINK Drop one in a glass. Take a
Shimmery gum glass of bubbly pic, then
balls are officially ($3.25 for ¼ lb., drink!
a thing ($6 for sockerbit.com). AND FOR THE
1 lb., nuts.com). B U B B LY ?
Ask friends to
bring bottles,
or stock up on
Oh Snap! ($16,

F R O M L E F T: C O U R T E S Y B O N B O N B A L L O O N S ; S T U D I O F I R M A / S T O C K S Y; C O U R T E S Y C L U B W. C O M .
clubw.com).

M AKE IT POPPIN’

IS IT RE ALLY A PART Y
WITHOUT CONFE T TI? FILL
ROUND BALLOONS WITH
MYL AR AND TISSUE
PIECES, THEN INFL ATE
THEM AND TIE ON RIBBON
STRINGS. (INSTANT
DECOR!) AT MIDNIGHT—
WHY NOT ?— POP ’EM AND
MAKE IT R AIN SPARKLES!

220 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


WHAT
THE
BEST
MORNINGS
ARE
MADE OF.

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“We’ll all be
better off if women
are reaching
for—and
achieving—their
highest
ambitions.”
—SHERYL SANDBERG,
COSMO CONTRIBUTING
CAREERS EDITOR

Dream Bigger!
E Z R A B A I L E Y/G E T T Y I M AG E S ( 3 )

WHY IS IT SO HARD TO SAY, “I’M AMBITIOUS,” WITHOUT APOLOGIES?


IN A NEW SURVEY FROM LEANIN.ORG AND MCKINSEY & COMPANY, WOMEN GRAPPLE WITH WHAT
WE WANT, WHAT’S IN OUR WAY, AND HOW WE CAN SUPPORT ONE ANOTHER’S GOALS.
BY SAR A AUSTIN

223
WORK
1. Would you like
to be promoted
from your current
position?
Yes

89
WOMEN
%
(MEN 90%)

“Sometimes the word ambi-


WHAT IS YOUR tious feels like code for some-
GREATEST AMBITION? thing bad: underhanded, even
selfish. But I know it’s just
“To provide about going after your goals.”
a comfortable —NICOLE ROMAN, 21, BUSINESS
lifestyle for myself STUDENT, UNIVERSITY OF
doing something ARKANSAS, FAYETTEVILLE
that makes me
genuinely happy “I am ambitious about my
while being able career. But I also realize there
to help the community
and my family.” are other ways to be ambi-
—DEBORAH GREEN, 23 tious: volunteering, parenting,
or being the best friend you
can be.” —LILY PENG, 19,
ECONOMICS STUDENT, BOSTON
COLLEGE
“To lead!
I want to “I am definitely ambitious, and
influence people I have recently stopped apolo-
and to help gizing for it! I am competitive
them reach their and committed to my career.”
potential.” —AMANDA ROSSO, 21, BUSINESS
—JANA MORELLI, 33 STUDENT, UNIVERSITY OF
if i were to call you ambitious, described the top spot—whether WISCONSIN AT MADISON
would you take it as a compli- that means running a Fortune
ment? For some women, the word 500 company, a TV show, or a “To have a
“I wouldn’t say I’m super ambi-
tious, because I am fairly con-
evokes the worst stereotype of a dental practice—as an exhila- career that
tent with life at the moment. I
backstabby workaholic. Women rating challenge. Some see a big still allows me
to have am newly employed and on
feel judged for being too ambi- job as the payoff they deserve (“I a family.” the hunt for my first apart-
tious and judged for not being didn’t work this hard for noth- —SHEALA LENNOX, 23 ment, and for now, there is not
ambitious enough. Big life choices ing”); others as the best way to much else I am looking for.”
—ELLISON YOUNG, 22, MEDIA BUYER,
can seem so fraught that it’s make a difference (“I like helping NEW YORK CITY
sometimes hard not to take other people achieve”) or have a voice in “To know
women’s ambitions as an implicit strategy (“When you’re not calling that I made “I haven’t decided where I
someone else’s want to be careerwise, so it’s
rebuke of our own. the shots, you don’t really have a time on earth hard to say if I am truly
But ambition is the opposite say in what gets done”). a little easier. ambitious.” —SHEALA LENNOX,
of a dirty word. Drive, determi- “The journey to the top excites I don’t need fame.” 23, EXECUTIVE SALES ASSISTANT,
—LESLIE OGDEN, 25
nation, speaking up about your me. I take every opportunity as PELHAM, NY

goals—aka ambition—are what a chance to grow, and I love hav- “My ambition comes from my
get you to a top leadership job. ing a big goal,” says Christina addiction to the ‘buzz’ I get
And that’s where nearly two- Rupsingh, a 27-year-old MBA when I kick ass at something.”
thirds of women under 30 aspire candidate at Western Univer- —DEBORAH GREEN, 23, MEDIA
BUYING ASSOCIATE, LOS ANGELES
to be, according to a new survey sity in Toronto. “I do not believe
of nearly 30,000 employees and becoming a top executive is a goal “I am not ashamed to admit I’m
118 companies from LeanIn.org for everyone. However, that is partly driven by the money.”
—ANESIA RETICKER, 23, DOCTOR OF
and McKinsey & Company. In the choice we as women should PHARMACY CANDIDATE, UNIVERSITY
interviews with Cosmo, women get to make.” OF ILLINOIS AT CHICAGO
All data is for employees under

224 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


30, surveyed by LeanIn.org and
McKinsey & Company.
sip
pitch
fast-track
©2015 glacŽau. glacŽau¨, smartwater¨ and label are registered trademarks of glacŽau.

up
va p o r- d is tilled w a ter, i nspi red by t he clouds .
up
drinksmartwater.com
up
WORK
Not that our hang-ups have
suddenly gone away: Women
2. Do you aspire deal with it. Why don’t we tell
women that?” —NICOLE ROMAN,
I’m Not
under 30 remain significantly to be a top 21, BUSINESS STUDENT, UNIVERSITY Interested

51
OF ARKANSAS, FAYETTEVILLE
less ambitious for the top spot executive in your
than men are, the new survey TIP FROM THE TOP
finds. And although women and
field? “I always left the office
men begin their careers with at 5 p.m. to go to
Yes

65
equal aspirations, at each subse- yoga class, and then
quent level, men are more inter-
ested in being promoted.
This ambivalence persists for
I’d go home and do
my e-mail for an
hour,” says Anne
%
Kreamer, author of WOMEN (MEN 66%)
good reasons. As Sheryl Sand-

%
Risk/Reward . “You
berg—Facebook COO, cofounder need to get your work
of LeanIn.org, and Cosmo con- done, but if you are
“The chaos and adventure of
the start-up process drives me.
tributing careers editor—has
WOMEN (MEN 75%) working all the time, I want to be a leader, but that
documented, studies consistently you get brittle. Find doesn’t have to mean being a
show that aggressive women your yoga, baking, or top exec.” —CHRISTINE CHA, 22,
are less liked at work and that “I am very interested. There hiking, whatever it is FREELANCE DEVELOPER, NYC

they are less likely to move up are few women of color in that gives you inner “Corporate isn’t my style.”
as a result. “As a woman, I feel positions of power, so it’s fortitude.” —CASEY GOLDBERG, 23, GRADUATE
important that I be able to
like I am expected to be more STUDENT, MARRIAGE AND FAMILY
help other women who look THERAPY, LONG BEACH, CA
complacent with my career and like me.” —DANIELLE NOEL, 21, Balancing
less competitive,” says Amanda COMMUNICATIONS STUDENT AT
Rosso, a 21-year-old student GEORGE WASHINGTON UNIVERSITY, Family and I Don’t Think
WASHINGTON, DC
at the University of Wisconsin Work I’d Succeed

56 26
at Madison. “I struggle find- “I want to be in my company’s
ing a balance between being Situation Room! Presidential
feminine and ambitious in an cabinet optional.” —JANA
MORELLI, 33, DIRECTOR OF SALES
office. I want to be respected and OPERATIONS, SEATTLE
strong, not just fun and nice.”
No one wants to lean in to being
% %
“I want to be a showrunner
for TV and film, which is a
unlikable.
lot like being a CEO. I like
Workplace policies—unequal WOMEN (MEN 55%)
working on large-scale WOMEN (MEN 27%)
pay, inflexible hours, paltry paid projects with moving parts.
leave—haven’t evolved to accom- It’s overwhelming and
modate women’s changing ambi- exciting, and you never “In my career and through my “You have to be responsible
feel totally comfortable.” Lean In Circle, I’ve seen exam-
tions either, as the American —LAURIEL MARGER, 22,
for absolutely every bill and
ples of women in top leader- issue, so all problems are your
Association of University Women FILM STUDENT, CONSULTANT,
ship roles with lives I’d like to problems. As a 21-year-old,
has tracked. Even at companies WRITER, LOS ANGELES
emulate. Happy families, flexi- I’ve never had that type of
that offer flexibility programs— ble hours, and the respect of responsibility, so right now,
and the majority of employers 3. Why wouldn’t their top-level colleagues. If I it’s a little intimidating.”
can see it, I can be it.” —JANA —KARA O’CONNOR, 21, KINESIOL-
in the LeanIn.org survey do— you be interested MORELLI, 33, DIRECTOR OF SALES OGY STUDENT AT DEPAUW
women and men tend not to take OPERATIONS, SEATTLE UNIVERSITY, GREENCASTLE, IN
advantage. There’s a perception it in being a top
TIP FROM THE TOP
would hurt them at work. Pater- executive? Just because you
TIP FROM THE TOP
“To make sure that
nity leave is offered at 44 percent
of the companies surveyed, but Stress and aren’t crushing it at
work for a couple of
the fear of failing
doesn’t stop me, I
only 1 percent of men with chil- Pressure

68
years doesn’t mean over-prepare to
dren under 18 participated in the you aren’t ambitious. ensure I know my
last three years. Life happens. “The stuff cold,” says
When flexibility feels like a important thing is not Tai Wingfield, SVP
non-option, big ambitions seem to scale back ambi- at the Center for
more daunting. “My hard-work- tions in anticipation Talent Innovation
ing parents always struggled with
work-life balance, and some-
times, it felt like the balance was
% of conflicts that don’t
yet exist,” Sandberg
says. “Anyone who is
and coauthor of
the CTI study Black
WOMEN (MEN 57%) Women: Ready to
not in my favor,” says Lauren lucky enough to Lead . “Command
Levine, a 26-year-old nonprofit have options should your subject and
marketing manager in Boston. “I “Guys face pressure too, and keep them open for you’ll command
definitely think it would be tough we teach them they can as long as possible.” the room.”

226 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


Scratch, Breathe
a n d #Fe e l Gl a d e
©2015 S.C. Johnson & Son, Inc. All rights reserved.

No o the r s cen t s feel l i ke G l a d e. ®

O u r b ig , b e a ut i f ul new candl e turns a spark o f


e m o t io n in to so m e thi ng yo u can fe e l al l ove r.
Feel Warm. Feel Glade.®
WORK
4. Going forward, 5. Why would
do you think being being a woman
a woman will make advance-
make it harder or ment harder?
easier for you to My Industry
advance in your Is Still Male-
career? Dominated

42
No Effect

WHAT’S YOUR
GREATEST AMBITION?

“To get into


international
anti–money
laundering
efforts.”
—LINDSAY LEHRER, 24
57 %
*

“In the environment I work in


now, it doesn’t matter if you
%
“I’m a single mom working full-
time as a manager in the con-
struction industry. Women
just aren’t perceived as being
are a woman or a man—what
“To be competent, and the men in
completely matters is purely perfor-
the industry can’t handle the
financially mance. If I end up some-
ego blow of working under a
independent where else in the future where
woman. Aggressiveness is an
from my parents. that isn’t the case, then that
I’ll have to expected trait for excelling in
company isn’t for me.” —GLO
work hard.” GRAVES, 23, AD AGENCY PROJECT construction, but when a
—ELLISON YOUNG, 22 MANAGER, ATLANTA woman is aggressive, no one
understands or sees the
“I don’t feel discouraged. I value.” —DEANNA HARRIS, 32,
CONSTRUCTION PROJECT
offer something special: How
“To work in MANAGER, CHICAGO
the White House can old dudes make decisions
on issues that about my generation all by
themselves?” —NICOLE ROMAN, “Being a woman in the legal
impact women
and girls. ” 21, BUSINESS STUDENT, UNIVERSITY field is hard. Most partners
—SRUTI RAMADUGU, 25 OF ARKANSAS, FAYETTEVILLE and higher-up government
officials are men, and law is
greatly based around net-
Harder

39
working.” —LINDSAY LEHRER, 24,
STUDENT, UNIVERSITY OF GEORGIA
SCHOOL OF LAW, ATHENS

“Finding cofounders, employ-


ees, and investors can be

%
more of a challenge as a
female tech entrepreneur.
to be in that demanding executive are female, but only 23 percent of At the same time though,
my biggest motivation is
position.” Being in charge seems senior vice presidents and 17 per-
when someone doubts what
Easier

4
exhausting whether or not you cent of C-Suite execs are. I can do—so keep it coming!”
have a family. Stress and pressure “Diverse teams produce better —CHRISTINE CHA, 22, FREELANCE
is the number one reason women results, and we’ll all be better off DEVELOPER, NYC

of all ages say they wouldn’t want if women are reaching for—and TIP FROM THE TOP
to pursue an executive role. achieving—their highest ambi- The people who advise

%
What’s not said enough is that tions,” says Sandberg. “Despite you don’t have to look
the top is where you can poten- modest improvements, we still like you. “Find a male
tially control your schedule and have a long way to go until we sponsor!” says Kiersten
lifestyle the most—and enact
the most change for other work-
reach gender equality in the
workplace. The research we did
*women
In the survey, entry-level
see a more even
Salander, deputy chief
of staff to the chair-
ers too. So it’s disappointing that with McKinsey helps us measure playing field than senior-
man at Bloomberg LP.
level women do—which
the survey shows that women are where we are and identify how could indicate hopeful “Look for someone you
underrepresented at every level in we can eliminate the barriers to cultural progress or simply feel comfortable
the corporate pipeline. Forty-five equality—and help all women that entry-level women going to for help over
percent of entry-level employees achieve their full potential.” haven’t experienced bias yet. and over.”

228 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


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WORK
QUESTION 5 (CONTINUED) WHY IS
ADVANCEMENT HARDER? Society Is
Biased

19
Family Com-
mitments Will
Make It Hard
More ways to

21
share your f lair.
%
% “Being a woman in today’s
society means that I will often
have to work twice as hard to
prove that I am as good as the
“I don’t have children, and I’m WHAT’S YOUR
men. As a woman of color, it
already worried about how I’ll GREATEST AMBITION? will be even harder. However,
balance being a female par- I have learned to work harder
ent with fulfilling my ambi- “To become but also smarter, and I think
tions.” —LAUREN LEVINE, 26, a therapist. that will help me to advance.”
NONPROFIT MARKETING MANAGER, I have a strong —DANIELLE NOEL, 21, COMMUNICA-
BOSTON TIONS STUDENT AT GEORGE
desire for it.”
WASHINGTON UNIVERSITY,
—CASEY GOLDBERG, 23
“I don’t really believe that you WASHINGTON, DC
‘can do it all’ without dropping
the ball in at least one area of “Being a top executive has this
your life. I’ve charted my “To help thin line between coming off
goals, and to be honest, I reshape higher bitchy and commanding or
don’t see how a traditional education.” compromising and posing
family fits into the plan.” —CHRISTINE CHA, 22 everything as a question.
—LAURIEL MARGER, 22, FILM STU- Constantly working with a
DENT, CONSULTANT, WRITER, L.A. careful filter does not seem fair
“To not just and is something I hope will
“Taking maternity leave can set reach my own change during the life of my
you back a couple of months goals but career.” —ANESIA RETICKER, 23,
or a few years. A company to help other DOCTOR OF PHARMACY CANDIDATE,
would much rather promote a women reach UNIVERSITY OF ILLINOIS AT CHICAGO
male employee who they theirs.”
know won’t require a replace- —NICOLE ROMAN, 21 “Unfortunately, men are still
ment while his family grows.” seen as the CEO types and
—SHEALA LENNOX, 23, EXECUTIVE are trusted in managerial
SALES ASSISTANT, PELHAM, NY “To get paid roles. However, my company
like a man has a female CEO and many
“I want to have as much of a while wearing of my bosses are women, and
presence in my children’s Louboutins and they are kicking butt. I strive
running shit.” every day to be like them.”
lives as my parents did in —LAURIEL MARGER, 22
mine. The beauty of the world —JESSICA GOLDSTONE, 22, PUBLIC
now is that it’s possible to do RELATIONS PROFESSIONAL, NYC
that and have a killer career.” “To find my
—CAROLYN CANDLER, 24, ASSIS- purpose—and TIP FROM THE TOP
TANT DESIGNER, NYC to be happy.” Women can be sad-
—DANIELLE NOEL, 21
dled with “office
“I have worked hard on respect-
housework” and less
ing both my career and my
personal life. When I am at glam projects. “If
work, I am focused on only my you’re picking up
work. When I’m home, I am balls others have
focused on my family. I hope dropped, let them
to continue this balance as I drop, and let some-
move up the ladder.” —KIM
GLENDENNING, 36, DIRECTOR OF
one else fix it,” says
OPERATIONS, TAMPA, FL Laszlo Bock, SVP of
people operations at
Google. “This may
feel worse for women.
WANT TO MEET OTHER WOMEN WHO CAN But if you’re working
HELP YOU WORK TOWARD YOUR GOALS? on something that
HEAD TO LEANINCIRCLES.ORG. isn’t valued, you’re
wasting your time.” The Art of Entertaining™
®, TM, © 2015 Kellogg NA Co.
WORK
“You’re Going to
Have a Great Time”
Journalist and activist Gloria Steinem took a winding path: from working in India post-college
to helping found New York and Ms. magazines to becoming maybe the most famous feminist in the world. Talking
in her apartment—the same one she shared with roommates during her first years in NYC, now
filled with mementos of her travels—it’s clear she’s had an absolute blast. You’re next.… BY J OA N N A C O L E S

COSMO: Your book looks back women, ‘I know life is hard,


on the women’s movement in but we’re together for the
the ’70s. Is it easier now? next hour and you’re safe.’ I
GLORIA: “I think it’s changed thought, You had me at hello.
a lot. Still, if you don’t play We need to build bridges, not
a submissive role, if you don’t sit and nitpick what women
do what you’re supposed have on.”
to do, you get to be a ‘loud
black woman’ or a ‘bitchy COSMO: What can we do to
white woman.’” combat everyday sexism, like
when someone says, “No man
COSMO: How do you deal? is voting for Hillary”?
GS: “The best thing to say GS: “Say, ‘No insecure man is
when somebody calls you a voting for Hillary.’ Laugh at
bitch is ‘thank you.’” them. To an asshole like Don-
ald Trump, we need to come
COSMO: Women still don’t back and say, ‘You think Heidi
aspire to top executive jobs Klum’s not a 10? You’ve never
as often as men. Why? been a 1! If you lost your wallet,
GS: “Well, some of them are every woman would be gone.’”
lousy jobs. We are so behind
as a nation in terms of flexi- COSMO: Will Hillary win?
ble work patterns and paren- GS: “I think she could win.
tal leave. But you can both In 2008, I felt strongly she
be in the workplace and have couldn’t, because we just
the fun—and it is totally haven’t seen enough females
fun—of making change being authoritative. But she
while you’re there. Part of the and many others have now
solution is collective and leg- changed things enough so that
islative, and part of it is what maybe we can imagine it. But
Sheryl Sandberg points out: it won’t be cured until men
The single most important are raising children as much
career decision you make is COSMO: You got married late. have sex with somebody that as women are. And then we’ll
who your partner is.” How important was sex to you I didn’t have lunch with. With know that men can be lov-
NAOMI NISHI. BOOK: BEN GOLDSTEIN/STUDIO D.

as a young woman? hooking up, it’s not a judg- ing and nurturing. It’s a libel
COSMO: How do you know if GS: “Romance and sex is ment, it’s just a question: Is on guys to say they can’t. Men
a guy will be supportive? a great adventure. You’re this what you really want to want to be with their children,
GS: “Do you feel like you have exploring how you feel, how do, or is it the only way you but they’re penalized if they say
to wear your makeup to bed? the other person feels. I don’t know to communicate?” so. We’re restricted, true, but
Can you be your own self think I was ever actually they’re restricted too. We’re all
with that person? And does single. I was always overlap- COSMO: Is criticism of pop- trying to complete the circle.”
he make you better? Some ping men. I kind of regret it culture feminists like Taylor
reporter once asked me what because you end up hurting Swift and Beyoncé valid?
the sexiest thing a man ever people. But that’s the way I GS: “I saw Beyoncé at Chime Steinem’s new
memoir, My Life on
did for me was, and I said, was living. I don’t feel great for Change. She said to a the Road, hits
‘Iron my blouse!’” about the idea that I would crowd of thousands of mostly shelves October 27.

232 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015


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THIS SWEEPSTAKES IS IN NO WAY SPONSORED, ENDORSED OR ADMINISTERED BY, OR OTHERWISE ASSOCIATED WITH, INSTAGRAM
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FACEBOOK. European Wax Center Celebrate You Sweepstakes Sponsored by Hearst Communications, Inc. Sweepstakes starts 10/13/15 at 12:01
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WORK

D R E S S F O R T H E J O B Y O U WA N T

“I NEED
FUN WORK
MAKE-UNDER HANDLE IT
For a classy, low-key look, Structured, duffel-shaped
skip bubble-gum pink bags with thicker
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CLOTHES
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FA SHION EDI TOR: ADAM MAN SUROGLU. GROOMER: JAMIE DORMAN USING DIOR SK IN. FA SHION S T IL L S: S T UAR T T YSON /
S T U D I O D . S T Y L I S T: S A B R I N A G R A N D E . B E A U T Y S T I L L S : J E F F R E Y W E S T B R O O K / S T U D I O D ; B E N G O L D S T E I N / S T U D I O D .
as a full - time research associate at NASDAQ,
Sherry Li analyzes companies that are planning
to go public and helps make sure existing clients SHERRY LI
AGE: 28 LESS IS MORE PERFECT
are satisfied. She also uses her native Mandarin CONTRAST
CITY: Kick up your accessories
language skills to help her team communicate NEW YORK, NY game with one rose-gold cuff Wear a whimsical print in
with Chinese start-ups and NASDAQ-listed rather than a pile of simple colors to balance
Chinese companies. In the future, Li wants to CURRENT GIG: distracting bangles. work and play.
RESEARCH
work as a liaison between the U.S. capital mar- ASSOCIATE, BRACELET, Swarovski, $199, JACKET, Express, $108,
ket and Chinese start-ups, helping them come NASDAQ swarovski.com express.com
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joining the occasional bell-ringing ceremony, Li JACKET, DKNY,
wants to “show the joyful part of the work and dkny.com. SHIRT,
that I have my own personality.” Equally crucial, $59.90, BAG,
she needs clothes that don’t drown her petite $59.90, Express,
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row and polka-dot prints match without look- Ann Taylor, $128,
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that she is modern but means business, and NEAT PLEATS SUBTLE LIFT
$125, (regular)
Faux-leather material Volumizer gives extra-
scattered jewelry pieces add pizzazz. Maybelline $149, and
RING, $149, all punches up a demure straight hair a boost without
New York makeup artist Yadim Carranza says, pleated A-line skirt. reaching pageant heights.
Swarovski,
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BY JUDI T H OHIK UA RE
234 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ NOVEMBER 2015 PHOTO G R A PHED BY A L L IE K IRCHE R
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SURF
THE
NEW
WAVECOSMO’S
GUIDE TO
THE MODERN
PERIOD
BY laura beil & anna maltby
ILLUSTRATIONS BY eugenia loli
M E N S T R UAT I O N !
Half the world’s been doing it once a month
for, oh, 200,000 years, but only
now, in 2015, is it something we’re finally
talking about in a semi-shame-free way.
Unfortunately, research and treatments
are still stuck in the days of 1950s
condescension (“cuddle up with a hot water
bottle, little lady!”). It’s kind of crazy
that more than 80 percent of women experience
cramps, irritation, and moodiness
during their periods, and yet no one
seems to care enough to fix it.
We can’t create magical new period cures
for you (we’re not actually doctors or
Big Pharma researchers), but we can help you
ride the crimson wave with a little more
confidence. Because you’re way too busy and
important to be held back by a little
bleeding out of your wherever.

239
DOES YOUR
PERIOD HAVE
TO BE THIS BY laura beil

BAD?
TREATMENT FOR
of flowers,” he reported solemnly.
Public and medical lore at the time
contended that the touch of a men-
struating woman could not only
wither plants but could turn wine
treated pain?” asks ob-gyn Frank
Tu, MD, of NorthShore University
HealthSystem in Chicago.
Early treatment could be vital.
Recent studies have found poten-
sour and keep dough from rising. tial links between the severity of
PERIOD PAIN This imaginary threat was
even given a name—menotoxin—
menstrual cramps in younger life
and the risk of developing chronic
HASN’T ADVANCED and doctors debated its existence pain in later years. Severe cramps
IN 30 YEARS. as recently as the 1970s. In 1977,
a group of researchers writing in
make cells in the central nervous
system more sensitive, says Pamela
WHAT GIVES? The Lancet wondered if the elusive Stratton, MD, who studies endo-
menotoxin was in fact related to metriosis, a condition that can lead
prostaglandins, hormone-like to painful periods, at the National

t
chemical messengers produced Institutes of Health. “We’ve found
he roses were a gift from by the body that may be elevated that women with endometriosis
a grateful patient to during a woman’s period. They are more sensitive to pain and stay
Dr. Béla Schick in the sum- were on to something, but not more sensitive,” she says.
mer of 1919. When the flowers in the way they thought. Studies Yet it’s typical for a woman
arrived, the doctor asked his maid throughout the late ’70s and ’80s to go five to eight years without
to place them in water. She hesi- determined that prostaglandins an endometriosis diagnosis, Dr.
tated but took them at his insis- could trigger uterine contractions Stratton says, and by then, treat-
tence. The next day, the blooms and menstrual pain. More signifi- ment may not be as effective.
had wilted. The servant admitted cantly, research determined that “They accept the pain as part of
she should not have handled them nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory their periods,” she says. “Women
because she was menstruating, drugs, or NSAIDs, blocked pros- are sometimes told by their doc-
and during those days of the taglandins and offered relief. tors that it is all in their head or it
month, her touch could be lethal. About three-quarters of all is normal.” As many as 30 percent
Intrigued, Dr. Schick—a women are thought to experience of gynecological patients overall
renowned physician in Vienna— some kind of menstrual pain. are suffering severe, recurring
began investigating the mysterious Among young women, it is the period pain, according to a study
killer poison. In 1920, he pub- leading single cause of lost time released in August. And when
lished the results of an experiment from school or work. “If you com- symptoms are treated, the stan-
in which he asked women to hold pare women and men in terms of dard advice has changed little in
blossoms at different times of the their ability to influence society, three decades. It is one of the most
month. “The skin of menstruat- how much unrealized potential significant health problems for
ing women did in fact excrete is lost from women because they which there is almost no public
substances that hasten the death have to deal with insufficiently discussion and little research.

2015 THE YEAR THE PERIOD WENT PUBLIC


05 15
03 15
An artsy photo
04 15 Nicolle Wallace, former com-
munications director under
of a woman with Musician Kiran W, says on The Nightly Show
a period stain on Gandhi runs With Larry Wilmore, “Yes, I
her sweatpants the London worked in the White House,
01 15 is “accidentally” marathon with- and yes, every 28 days I bled,
Top tennis player taken down by out a tampon, but the country went on.”
Heather Watson Instagram...twice. becomes a
blames Australian Uproar ensues. free-bleeding,
Open loss on “girl stigma-busting
things,” wins points sensation.
for honesty.
NSAIDs—which include OTC
drugs like ibuprofen, naproxen,
and aspirin as well as prescrip-
tion meds like Celebrex—were a
breakthrough treatment. After
that, much of medical science
took a victory lap and declared
the problem conquered. If you
search for research focused
on menstrual pain, as Dr. Tu
recently did, “it seemed to just get
quiet around the mid to late ’80s,”
he says. “People were no longer
interested.” That means we
haven’t had a significant advance
since Duran Duran released
shark “Notorious.”

w
week! hen Richard Legro,
MD, of Penn State
College of Medicine
applied for a grant to study pri-
mary dysmenorrhea—period pain
that is not tied to another cause—
he reviewed all ongoing projects
backed by the National Institutes
of Health. “There’s not one that is
developing or testing a treatment
to improve painful periods,” he
says. To be fair, tax money does
support research for endometrio-
sis and a related condition, adeno-
myosis. Great effort goes into
basic lab studies about chronic
pain—but research published this
summer in Nature Neuroscience
reported that experiments are
overwhelmingly conducted on
male rodents and that male and
female mice may experience pain
differently on a biological level.
Without new research into
why period pain persists in so
many women despite NSAIDs,
drug companies hesitate to invest
in developing a treatment, says
John LaMattina, a former head
of research and development
at Pfizer. A 2011 report from

07 15 08 15
Key & Peele offer Donald Trump
dudes a hilarious suggests GOP
“menstruation debate moderator
orientation,” Megyn Kelly had
06 15 earn an internal
07 15
“blood coming out
standing ovation of her wherever.”
Apple finally
updates your from women No taxation with menstruation! Twitter and Carly
iPhone’s Health everywhere. Canada ends its tax on sanitary Fiorina respond
app to include products, calling it discrimina- that #Periods
period tracking. tory to gals and transgender AreNotAnInsult.
guys. Aussies and Brits protest
ILLUSTRATIONS BY joana avillez “tampon taxes” too. 241
Stop the Pain
If you’re suffering, you don’t have to put
up with it. There are options. Of course, check
with your doctor.

TRY THESE WEIRD, BUT WHEN ALL


riding FIRST MIGHT WORK ELSE FAILS...
the NSAIDs Kinesio Narcotics
cotton Pop ibuprofen, Taping Some women’s
pony aspirin, or
naproxen with
You know that pain during
menses is so
flexible, colorful
food every 6 to tape athletes are severe, doctors
8 hours starting often sport- suggest serious
2 days before ing? A study in painkillers
your flow, says the Journal of like hydroco-
Juliet Nevins, Physical Therapy done.
MD, an ob-gyn “Try everything
PhRMA, a pharmaceutical indus-

k athryn Jones, a 33-year- Science found


in Brooklyn. it helps with else first,”
try group, lists 851 products in old occupational thera- Four pills Dr. Nevins
period pain.
development for conditions that pist who lives near (800 mgs) of Place a short says. “Narcot-
tend to affect women. Only three Boston, had excruciating periods ibuprofen every strip between ics use can
address endometriosis, and none starting in her teens. On the first 8 hours for the your belly button quickly lead to
first two to three and the top of dependency,
specifically targets cramps. day of her cycle, she could do days is safe especially if
the pubic-hair
It might seem like a sexist little more than curl up. “I would unless you have area, a longer you rely on
conspiracy, but there are lots of not even be able to answer my gastric issues. strip horizontally them every

PHOTO S U S E D IN C O N J UN C T I O N W I T H IL LU S T R AT I O N S: G E T T Y IM AG E S (4); JIM B R A DE NB U RG /C O RB I S ( 2); JA Z Z A RC HI V/C O RB I S .


reasons scientists don’t get that phone,” she says. “I found myself between the month.”
excited about menstruation. In holding my breath because the Exercise hip bones.
the research world, Fatal Scary pain came in such waves.” Both cardio Surgery
Problems attract grant money and She sought one doctor after
and stretching Ginger Sometimes
mitigate period period pain
launch careers. No one ever died another. “The only thing they According to a
pain, says a is the result
study published
from cramps. “You’re not going would say was, ‘Oh if you have 2014 study. in the Archives of problems
to get big dollars or prestige for bad cramps, go on birth control.’” Working out like fibroids or
of Gynecology
releases mood- endometriosis.
researching menstrual pain,” says She tried the Pill but didn’t enhancing
and Obstetrics
in June 2015, This kind of
Jennifer Bump, MD, of Baylor like the side effects. After that, she beta-endorphins pain tends to
this root is
College of Medicine, in Houston. says, “they just said deal with it— and boosts as effective as start earlier
Further hampering progress, get a heating pad, stay hydrated. circulation. an NSAID in and last longer
there’s no public outcry. Men—and I stopped bringing it up after a relieving period than regular
women with easier periods—may while. I wasn’t going to ask the Self- pain. Take a cramps, and
find it hard to empathize. Men- same question a million times.” Massage 250 mg supple- sufferers don’t
often have
A 15-minute ment every 6
struation remains a culturally Soon she stopped talking hours. the nausea or
aromatherapy
awkward topic, driven into the about it altogether. “You’re not rubdown may
diarrhea that
can accompany
shadows. “Throughout history, going to say, ‘I don’t feel good reduce cramps, Vitamin them. Your doc
women were shunned or locked today because I’m on my period.’ perhaps due to
more blood flow.
Injections may suggest
away in their little hut when they I mean, people blush, they look A doctor’s fibroid removal,
Lie faceup with
were on their period,” Dr. Bump away. Unless you’re a woman a pillow under injection of a laparoscopic
says. “There is this idea that this is with this same experience, no vitamin K1 into procedure for
knees. Pour
an acupuncture endometrio-
a curse, and it somehow is shame- one wants to hear about it.” 2 milliliters of sis, or in very
point just above
ful.” PMS is a subject fraught with Stephenie Combs, 28, of lavender oil on
the inner ankle serious cases,
stereotype and ridicule—witness Houston, lived with similar frus- belly; rub gently
improved men- hysterectomy.
in circular
Donald Trump versus Megyn trations. The cramps in her early motions around strual pain for an —Anna Maltby
Kelly. Women themselves can teens were tolerable, she says, but the navel and hour, according
to a small study
struggle with frank conversations “once I hit 25, something really upper pelvis.
of 14 women
about menstrual pain. Says Dr. happened to my hormones. I felt last year in Alter-
Bump, “I still have patients who, like my own body hated me.” She native Therapies
for lots of different reasons, don’t would soak in hot baths, then sit in Health and
want to talk about it.” on the couch clutching a glass of Medicine.

242
wine. She tried two doctors, both that would radiate down into her Kathryn Jones found her solu-
of whom told her pain was nor- upper thighs. She had trouble tion through unconventional
mal. “They’re like, ‘Doesn’t every even walking and often called in means: a girls’ getaway trip to a
woman cramp?’ I was popping sick. “I went to a really prestigious massage therapist who noticed
naproxen like candy and thinking, doctor, and he told me to just take MODERN
that her lower vertebra were fused.
this can’t be good for me.” a few ibuprofen before it starts,” PERIOD This caused her to favor one side
A lot of women do get better she says. It didn’t work. ESSENTIALS while she walked, throwing the
with NSAIDs. A review published She ended up in the office B lo o dy go o d muscles in her hips out of balance.
this summer by the Cochrane of Dr. Tu at NorthShore after ide a s to One side was almost locked in a
ma ke you r
research group found that women she was told he was an expert we ek a l it t le constant spasm, which got worse
taking 20 varieties of NSAIDs in gynecologic pain. He spent le s s b r uta l. during her period. A physical
were about twice as likely overall almost two hours discussing her therapist helped her learn how to
Sanitary
to get relief compared with women issues. He eventually advised Subscriptions relax the tightened muscles in her
who took a placebo. But according her to take a prescription muscle Le Parcel and pelvis, hips, and glutes as well as
to the Food and Drug Administra- relaxant the first few days of Hello Flo (both rebalance them through strength-
tion, NSAIDs can cause stomach- her period—a use that hasn’t $15 per month) ening exercises, which signifi-
been studied or FDA-approved will mail you cantly decreased her period pain.
aches, diarrhea, an increased risk
tampons, pads,
of heart attack, and over the long but has had a lot of anecdotal liners…and “I still feel uncomfortable, but I’m
haul, kidney problems. And for as success, he says. chocolate. not curled up in a ball,” she says.
many as half of women with severe The pain isn’t gone, but it Stephenie Combs got relief by
pain, the Cochrane report noted, doesn’t disrupt her life as much. Stealth changing her birth control to a
Packaging
NSAIDs don’t do any good at all. And she was glad she didn’t give Delivery service progestin-emitting IUD, which
That doesn’t mean you’re up seeking help. “Keep looking Lola (from lightened her periods without dra-
stuck though. Lyubov Fetsenets, for a doctor,” she says, “until you $10 per month, matically adding extra hormones
a 27-year-old school nurse who find someone who will actually mylola.com) in the rest of her body. “It changed
sends tampons in
lives outside Chicago, had cramps take time to listen to you.” a box so discreet,
everything tremendously,”
you can leave it Combs says. Dr. Bump feels the
out on your bath- hormonal IUD is an underused
room counter. game-changer for a lot of women.
It won’t help everyone though.
Tracking Apps
Avoid an ambush
Rarely, cramps can get worse on a
from Aunt Flo hormonal IUD, although the effect
with Clue, Ruby tends to wane after a few months.

n
by Glow, and
Period Tracker
Lite (all free,
othing will truly cure
Android and menstrual pain until
iOS). Monitor we understand where it
flow, sex drive, comes from. Cramps don’t begin
and PMS too. and end just with prostaglandins.
aunt flo Un-Granny They cause the uterus to contract,
is in town Panties
Sexy Thinx (from
and those contractions help the
inner lining to shed. But this same
$24, shethinx process occurs in everyone who
.com), breath-
able Dear Kate menstruates. “So why does one
(from $32, dear woman experience it as painful
kates.com), and and another doesn’t? We just
sporty Knixwear don’t know,” says Laura Payne,
(from $20,
knixwear.com),
PhD, of the David Geffen School
are all absorbent of Medicine at UCLA. “It’s not just
and reusable— the contractions. There’s some
great for light interaction happening there, and
days or spotting we don’t totally know what it is.”
backup.
To move forward, the cultural
Stain Busters aversion to honest and serious
An enzyme- discussion must end, Payne says.
based remover “There have been these taboos
like Carbona
Stain Devils #4 about talking about menstrua-
($3.99, carbona tion and really bringing it to the
.com) is tops. forefront as an issue that women
—A .M. deal with,” she says. “It’s not
the type of thing people think
of as a real problem.”
KNOW
YOUR
PCOS
With polycystic
ovarian syndrome,
your cycle may be
super-short and
light or extra-long

FLOW
and heavy. You
might also have
weight gain or obe-
sity, excess body
hair, and acne. It’s
serious, raising the
Hormonal IUDs risk for infertility
Mirena, Liletta, and diabetes, so
and Skyla release see a doc.
levonorgestrel,
which reduces the
thickening of the uter-
ine lining. Because
the IUD is next to the
uterus, hormones
don’t have to travel
The Pill, Patch, in the body, making
and Ring them very effective,
These methods says Meredith
prevent ovulation; Loveless, MD, an
that mechanism American College of
NSAIDs also reduces the Obstetricians and
This class of amount of lining Gynecologists
that builds up in spokesperson. Your Fasting
meds can reduce
flow for the same the uterus, so you period might go Muslim women
reason they help have less to shed. away completely. who fasted during
with cramps— Ramadan experi-
because they can enced a variety of
lower your levels of menstrual problems,
prostaglandins. including abnormally
light periods, very
short cycles, and
abnormally long or
heavy periods,
lighter according to a 2013
study in the Iranian
Progesterone
Therapy Journal of Reproduc-
The same kind of tive Medicine.
hormone that
IUDs use to give
you a more pleas-
ant period can
be taken orally to
lighten the flow.
Disordered Sleep
Pulling all-nighters
every single night? Regular Exercise
Skimping on sleep Docs aren’t sure why,
throws your hor- admits Dr. Loveless,
mones out of whack, but a good exercise Prescriptions
causing a domino routine seems to make If you’re regularly
effect throughout Extreme Exercise periods a bit lighter. bleeding through your
your body—includ- Intense physical Aim for at least pad or tampon in
ing, potentially, a strain may cause the 20 minutes of brisk less than two hours,
disappearing period. M.I.A. pituitary gland to walking a day. your doc might
slow or stop produc- prescribe tranexamic
tion of reproductive acid (aka Lysteda),
INFOGRAPHIC BY CARL DETORRES

hormones in order a drug that reduces


to conserve energy heavy bleeding.
for essential func- It’s used to treat
tions. Fitness fiends, hemophilia.
Being Underweight beware of rapid
Blame the combination weight loss and eat
of extreme strain on the plenty of calories, pro-
body systems plus low tein, and healthy fat.
body fat, which equals
unbalanced reproduc-
tive hormones.
Whether you get a drip or a deluge is kind of
random. Two things really matter: if your personal
normal changes and if your frequency is funky
(more than once a month or less than once every
three months). If this sounds like you, the info
you need to get back on track might be in here.

Adenomyosis
Aka endometriosis
of the uterus. It’s
endometrial tissue Uterine Fibroids
Funky that grows into the or Polyps
Schedules lining of the uterus, Some can alter the
Among flight causing painful lining or shape of the
attendants surveyed and heavy periods. uterus. In addition
wild in one 2013 study, Don’t just suck it to a lotta flow, look
cards about 15 percent up—talk to a gyno. out for irregular
suffered heavy bleeding, pelvic pain,
periods. Researchers frequent urination,
believe this could be and backaches.
linked to sleep distur- Smoking
bances and jet lag. …especially if you
started as a teen,
per a 2014 study
published in
Tobacco Control.
Add to the list of
Excess Weight reasons to visit
QuitNet.com. The Copper IUD
More fatty tissue
Stress “The uterus has to get
means more used to the copper
Chronic everyday estrogen, which can
stress—as in, an in Paragard—it causes
thicken uterine lining some inflammation,
abusive relationship and cause skips in
or being someone’s so you build up more
ovulation. When your blood and cramp
caretaker—may period does come, heavier
make your period more,” says Laura
it’s crazy-heavy. MacIsaac, MD,
weirdly irregular or
light (maybe because associate professor
an anxiety-ridden of obstetrics, gynecol-
body isn’t an opti- ogy, and reproductive
mal place to host a science at the Icahn
fetus) one month, School of Medicine at
then doubly heavy Mount Sinai. “For
the next time you most women, by the
menstruate. Soy third menses, their
Eating food that period goes back to
Working With contains phyto- the way it was.”
Chemicals estrogens can

Flow- In a recent Iranian


study of employees
theoretically elevate
your estrogen levels

Chart at a pharmaceutical and bring trouble.


company, those who Still, you’d likely

Key
were regularly exposed have to eat a ton of
to certain organic soy to see an effect,
says Dr. Loveless. Bleeding
solvents had heavier Disorders
periods. Older studies
Super-heavy
on farm workers found
WORK that those exposed
periods are a mark
of von Willebrand
to pesticides also had
disease, an under-
menstrual trouble,
LIFESTYLE diagnosed genetic
possibly because STIs disorder. Watch
some chemicals can Chlamydia, gonor- for other signs like
mimic estrogen. rhea, and pelvic nosebleeds and
H E A LT H I S S U E inflammatory disease bruising. —A .M.
can interfere with
the uterus’s ability
MEDS to contract, making
bleeding worse. Your
gyno can test you.
245
IT WORKED
Gut Trouble FOR ME!
The same hormones that “Raspberry tea.”
cause your uterus to con- — SH A NICE N., 27
tract cause the organs
along the digestive tract
to contract too. Results:
Cravings
gross symptoms like
Pre-period, the stress
bloating, constipation,
hormone cortisol spikes
diarrhea, and nausea.
and the calm-inducing
WHAT TO DO: If your hormone serotonin
stomach tolerates them,
take ibuprofen or naproxen.
dips—a one-two punch
Hormonal birth control may that leaves you wanting
also help a lot. Pills with a sugary, carby, fatty,
low dose of estrogen are and salty comfort food,
good for sensitive stomachs, says Willow Jarosh, RD,
says ob-gyn Meredith
Loveless, MD. And cut down of C&J Nutrition.
on salty junk food—you WHAT TO DO: Meet cravings
may be craving it, but it IT WORKED halfway. Instead of fries,
can make bloating worse. FOR ME! have baked sweet potato
“I head to yoga to relish wedges (the vitamin C is
in the pose modifica- good for skin, and potassium
tions offered to women curbs water retention). If you
on their ‘monthly holi- want Chinese, pair lean
day,’ as my instructor protein with broccoli and
calls it. (I also go to hear brown rice (fiber keeps you
him say that.)”
regular) sans sauce (sodium
— BECK Y T., 2 9 makes you bloat more).

YOU’VE GOT ISSUES.


CRAMPS ARE NOT THE ONLY PAIN-
IN-OR-NEAR-THE-ASS THAT IT WORKED

CROPS UP DURING SHARK WEEK.


FOR ME!
“Chipotle.”

HERE’S HOW TO FEEL BETTER. — A D RI A N A A ., 23

Mood Swings
When your flow starts,
there’s a drop in estro- Acne
gen, which plays a big High progesterone
role in mood regulation, levels before your period
hence your transforma- rev up oil-gland produc-
tion into a lady-Hulk… tion. Then testosterone
or someone who just (a source of skin trouble)
watched The Notebook. stays steady as the hor-
WHAT TO DO: Hormonal BC mones that usually bal-
can be a winner here, or it ance out T drop. You’re
could cause crankiness—if left defenseless and
one method or brand fails
you, try another. Snack on
zitty, says dermatologist
produce and protein to avoid Monica Schadlow, MD.
blood sugar fluctuations WHAT TO DO: Use a gentle
that exacerbate moodiness. cleanser, like Cetaphil or
Cerave, and don’t go nuts
with the harsh scrubs, ton-
ers, or wipes—you want to
IT WORKED
get rid of bad oils but keep
FOR ME! good ones. BC pills with
“I take a bath with drospirenone (Yasmin, Yaz)
Epsom salts and are FDA-approved to treat
drink cucumber water moderate acne. Prescription
like it’s my job.”
topical meds can also help.
— A L A N A W., 2 9

246
IT WORKED Fatigue
FOR ME! It’s super common,
“Orgasming laments Dr. Ashton. She
usually helps, so speculates that women
I try to have some
me-time.” may feel wiped out
— S O PHIE B., 31 by a decline in hormone
levels just before a
Headaches period starts.
and Migraines WHAT TO DO: Give in to that
The drop in estrogen may sleepiness at night, aiming
for 7 to 8 hours. When you
affect the activity of key wake up, even though you
neurotransmitters, says might be dragging, do about
osteopath Lee Peterlin, 30 minutes of moderate
director of headache cardio (walking works).
research at Johns Hop- It will give you an energy
boost—plus some bonus
kins University School of endorphins—afterward.
Medicine. Thus, your
head feels like crap.
WHAT TO DO: Start popping IT WORKED
NSAIDs two days before FOR ME!
your period headache usual- “I double over and
ly hits. Magnesium oxide, an just yell like a wild
OTC supplement, may help banshee. It’s like some
prevent migraines, says primitive form of release
Peterlin. If your pain is no and startles my
joke, ask your doc about Rx boyfriend…but, you
options such as triptans. know, pain.”
— K A SI A G ., 30

WE’VE GOT FIXES


IT WORKED
FOR ME!
Weight Gain “I recently put Young
If you’re gaining weight a Living’s PanAway
few days before your flow essential oil in a diffuser
starts, it’s probably water the night before and
I. Did. Not. Have. Any.
retention. The likely Cramps!”
culprit: yep, hormones. — A ND RE A V., 28

WHAT TO DO: Caffeinated


drinks can be a natural
diuretic, says Cosmo
contributor Jennifer
Ashton, MD, an ob-gyn in
Lower-Back Pain
Englewood, New Jersey. This may actually be
And hit a cycling or hot-yoga cramps in disguise:
class—not only will you Since some uteruses tilt
sweat away some water toward the back, that
weight, but exercise helps
P R O P S T Y L I S T: L A U R E N S H I E L D S F O R H A L L E Y R E S O U R C E S

with PMS in general. could be where you’re


feeling it.
WHAT TO DO: Go old-school:
Heating pads really can
help, whether your front or
back is hurting. Thermacare
IT WORKED makes portable ones for
FOR ME! under your clothes (from
“A fizzy drink, like
$3, amazon.com). An NIH
ginger ale, always study also showed that
helps...or a strong weekly sessions of yoga
margarita.” or stretching helped lessen
— M O R G A N B., 23 back pain (although it
wasn’t directly linked to
your red-dot special). —A .M.

PHOTOGRAPHED BY levi brown


THERE WILL
BE BLOOD
( so let’s deal with it )
Should I be using all-natu-
ral sanitary products?
Your call. In theory, fewer
chemicals might be better for
your body. But it’s not proven
Got tampon Q’s? We’re your source for tampon A’s. And pad A’s. And cup A’s. that chemicals in tampons
And A’s for pretty much everything else you’re wondering about down there. and pads leach into your
system…or that organic is
Should I be worried about What if I leave a tampon better. If you tend to get itchy
Toxic Shock Syndrome? in way too long? or irritated, you may be a
Not really. Here’s the deal: If it’s been in there for more good candidate, says Dr.
TSS is a potentially fatal ill- than a day or two, see your WE NEED YOU Ashton. And everyone
ness caused by bacteria, not ob-gyn. “We’ve taken should opt for unscented—
tampons. They can facilitate
it in part because a blood-
some crazy things out of
vaginas before. It won’t
Tampons fragrances can be harsh on
your delicate vag.
soaked tampon is a good shock us at all!” says Jennifer for All!
place for bacteria to grow, Ashton, MD. Your gyno Most states don’t So…the menstrual cup.
says Meredith Loveless, MD. will most likely do a culture tax essential How does that work?
Model Lauren Wasser made to check for infections The cup—a bell-shaped, flex-
items, like grocer-
headlines this summer when and may place you on antibi- ible vessel that collects blood
she shared her TSS story, otics as a precaution.
ies and prescrip- right in your va-jay-jay—has
which ended with a leg am- tions, yet all but been around since the 1930s,
putation. That’s terrible, but Can I shower with my 10 states do tax but it’s getting more popu-
the odds of TSS happening to tampon in? sanitary products. lar. You fold up the rubbery
you are super rare: between Yep, but it will likely get wet Um...we’d call cup to insert it, and it returns
1 and 17 cases for every and then expand, so you may those essentials! to its shape inside you. After
100,000 menstruating have to change it sooner. about 10 hours, you dump it
Visit Change.org
people annually. To reduce out, clean it with warm water
to sign our No and mild soap, and put it
your risk for any infection: I get yeast infections after
Wash your hands before my period a lot. Could
Tax On Tampons back inside. Downside: It can
inserting a tampon, don’t wearing pads be why? petition. Worse, leak if it overfills or slips out
wear one for more than eight Contact with a wet pad can many low-income of place. Still, says Dr. Love-
hours, and pick the smallest irritate skin, making it more and homeless less, “a lot of women love it
needed for your flow. susceptible to yeast that’s women often don’t once they get the hang of it.”
Using a super-absorbency present. But it might also have access to
tampon if you don’t need it stem from changes in vaginal I’m a transgender
tampons and pads
could lead to micro-tears in pH, says Dr. Ashton. “Try eat- man and shopping for
the vaginal wall, which ing probiotics—there’s grow-
at all. Food banks “feminine products” is
could let germs in. ing data that this can help.” and shelters alienating. Tips?
distribute them, Thankfully, almost anything
but they’re often can be ordered online. The
feelings of disorientation
in short supply.
some trans men feel during
Our campaign periods are harder to solve.
at Cosmopolitan “Deciding what to use can be
.com/Tampons challenging, especially if he’s
ForAll lets you already transitioned socially—
Now t h i s donate $7 (the it’s difficult to wear boxers
i s wha t cost of a box) to and use a liner or pad,” says
we c a l l a Henry Ng, MD, president of
diva c up. Distributing
GLMA: Health Professionals
Dignity, a charity Advancing LGBT Equality.
that provides “Some may use tampons, but
these products for others that may give them
to shelters across dysphoria.” Talking to a gen-
the country. der-affirming doctor about
options, including injections
or surgery that eliminate
periods, can help. Find one
at GLMA.org. —A.M.

248 PHOTOGRAPHED BY levi brown


men on ...Buying

periods
Sure, there are more fun topics to
Tampons
for You
“What’s the problem?
[Cashiers] know it’s
not for you! They’re
discuss with your guy (dream travel probably thinking,
spots, Fallon vs. Colbert), but chatting ‘That guy has a
about menses can make for a better girlfriend he loves.’”
TOTM, every month. “Talk early — B e n P.

and it won’t cause ongoing anxiety,” “I buy the condoms,


says Cosmo guy-advice guru Logan you buy the tampons.”
Hill. Tell him if you’re regular (“so he — O rla n do M .
can support you if you’re late,” says “If I was, like, married,
Hill), what you want in bed (“massage I would do it.”
week?” he suggests), and your symp- — S a m W.
toms (“a reminder that women are
“It’s overwhelming—
different”). We asked a group of very there are like 20
game guys what they think about... kinds!” — P a u l S .

...Menstrual
...Periods ...Period Sex Cups
“Sucks to be a girl. “It can be disconcerting “It’s reusable?! No, no,
I mean, er, it’s hard when you see the no, no, no.” — B e n P.
to be a girl.” blood. It’s like, okay,
— O rla n d o M . , 23 wow, your sexual ...PMS
organs are not just a “The first word that
“I don’t want to hear place my penis can comes to mind is
about it. La la la la.” hang out.” bitch. No joke. That
— B e n P. , 2 2 — O m a r i G . , 31 time of the month
brings serious fights.”
“No one’s pregnant! “Shower sex! I don’t —Will B.
It’s like a little mile- care. In high school,
stone every month.” my girlfriend wasn’t “Some guys think,
— S a m W. , 23 on birth control so she’s mad, but I’m not
we did it at the end of wrong, she’s on her
“It’s when the uterine her period so she period. It shouldn’t be
lining is shed each wouldn’t get pregnant.” that way—you proba-
month. I Googled it! — J o e y S . , 23 bly did mess up. It’s
I was like, I have not an excuse to do
to know what this You can conceive
whatever you want.”
is. It’s hard to while menstruating.
— Ja m e s J .
understand what Contraception, please!
your girlfriend is “If I’m dating someone
going through, “It’s not a turn-off, but who’s using that as an
because there is no it’s not a turn-on. And it excuse [to get mad],
equivalent for men.” isn’t happening on my that’s not the
— Ja m e s J . , 26 sheets.” — W i l l B . , 21 relationship for me.”
— S a m W.
“It’s something you
should do only if you “It’s life, it happens.
really know someone. If she snaps because
It’s a personal time.” I left my dish in the
—Paul S., 22
sink and I know she’s
“If you have sex all on her period, I cut
the time and there’s her slack.” — P a u l S .

paging a few days when you’re


not, it’s not that big
“I try to understand
why she’s in a mood. If
edward of a deal. You can
watch a new show on
it’s a small fight, why
are we having it? Is it
cullen Netflix! But if we’re
going on vacation,
because she’s on her
period? Am I drawing
I’m like, ‘please don’t
an unfair inference?”
be on your period!’”
— Omari G .
— S a m W.
If you’re on the Pill, “I like to know [if she’s
it’s safe to skip your menstruating] so I
CORBIS

placebo week if you can get the chocolate


want to avoid a period. out.” — O rla n do M .

NOTE FROM YOUR EDITORS


Venus’s conjunction with lively Mars on the 2nd bodes well for relationships. Savor
BY AUROR A TOWER some you-time when the New Moon enters Scorpio on the 11th, then get ready for
@AUROR A ASTRO adventure after the 22nd when the Sun moves into exciting Sagittarius.

11. 2 2 –12 . 21 12 . 2 2 – 01.19 01. 2 0 – 0 2 .18 0 2 .19 – 0 3 . 2 0 0 3 . 21– 0 4 . 2 0 0 4 . 21– 0 5 . 21 05. 22– 06. 20
Rest up, Sag: You could strike You’re hitting It’s go time! A Be strategic Keep juggling, Sparks fly when
Life’s about to career gold near your stride in a trine between about fitting new Taurus! Venus Venus and Mars
get hectic. If the 2nd when big way! Speak mystical Neptune opportunities moves into unite in your
you’re starting to Mars and flush up when a key and communica- into your groove. sociable Libra on zone of love on
see a kooky Venus unite in person asks for tive Mercury on Your ruler, active the 8th, giving the 2nd! Show
friend in a new your zone of fame your input near the 6th will fuel Mars, marches you the perfect off your gym
(read: hot) light, and success. the 10th, and the your creative into your zone of words for an ace gains when the
test the waters Work hard and wins will roll in. instincts. Let your partnership on pitch. Love will Full Moon enters
around the 6th. smart during this The 23rd, when vision lead you the 12th, making thrive near the your sign on the
The Sun moves time. The 13th is Venus opposes after the 18th both love and New Moon in 25th—an über
into your sign on a huge day for your ruler when Neptune work a joy. Plan a Scorpio on the romantic day. Go
the 22nd, romance, so Uranus, is your goes direct—but trip after the Sun 11th in your zone slow but steady
ushering in a mind your health biggest day for be cautious about moves into of relationships. toward your
wave of positive so you’re ready love this month. big decisions adventurous Use your silver heart’s desire.
momentum. for anything! A sexy getaway around the 29th. Sagittarius on tongue to catch YOU NEED: To be
YOU NEED: Some YOU NEED: To for two? YOU NEED: To the 22nd. someone special. real in order to
chill couch time RSVP to an YOU NEED: To embrace your YOU NEED: Your YOU NEED: To find true love.
pre-holiday rush. industry happy make way for weird side! finesse, not keep your body GEMINI GUY: You
SAGITTARIUS GUY: hour or two. new dreams. PISCES GUY: Say
force, to get what guessing with a have his
He’s running on CAPRICORN GUY: AQUARIUS GUY: hello to Mr. you want. new cardio class. undivided
E. Turn off his He’s all about his He’s in high Spontaneous! ARIES GUY: Your TAURUS GUY: He’s attention. Go for
phone, dim the boys this month. demand at work. Skip your normal pleasure is his feeling direction- a romantic walk
lights, and turn Catch up with Why not give him routine, and get pleasure! Share a less. Let him outdoors, and
your home into a your girls, and a relaxing, wild on the fantasy while vent over food, then take his
private, sensual pick up a few morning-delight town—and with he’s wrapped in wine, and plenty breath away
oasis for two. sexy pointers. wake-up call? each other. your sheets. of laughter. back at home.
PISCES
SAGITTARIU

TAURUS
CAPRICORN

GEMINI
AQUARIUS

ARIES
SCORPIO
10.23 –11.21
Stellar gifts: You have an eagle
eye for detail and know how to
make anyone you engage with feel
like the only one in the room.
Blind spots: In introspective
Fierce and moods, you can seem cold and
charismatic, give off mixed messages.
Tracee Ellis Ross
is a pure Scorpio. Fashion faves: You captivate in
October 29, dramatic and spare black or red
1972 outfits as well as more intricate
looks with eye-catching details.
Indulgence: The decadence of
0 6 . 21– 0 7. 2 2 0 7. 2 3 – 0 8 . 2 2 0 8 . 2 3 – 0 9. 2 2 0 9. 2 3 –10 . 2 2 all-day lovefests in bed with your
Make time for Your hustle is Keep reaching for Post-birthday amour tantalizes you.
love even if you’re strong, but don’t the stars! Be energy has you Seduction style: You know just
in nesting mode. forget the R&R! especially sharp fully recharged! when to turn up the charm and
When the Sun Spruce up your near the 2nd When Venus and when to pull back and let others
makes a pad, and throw a when VIPs are your ruler, lively
gorgeous sextile chill dinner for watching. Then Mars, unite in
pursue you, so your admirers fall
to Pluto in your friends around enjoy your love your sign on the hard and fast. You encourage
relationship zone the New Moon in life on the 18th, 2nd, a long-held deep, intense relationships, but
C L O C K W I S E F R O M T O P L E F T: C O U R T E S Y D A N I E L S . D U N N A M ; M I R E YA

on the 5th, a Scorpio on the when Neptune dream could reveal your innermost self to only

SCORPIO Your month: Driven by intuition,


small flirtation 11th. The 23rd is goes direct in come true. Keep a select few people.
may flourish. a great day to get your relationship an eye on your

GUY
ACIERTO/FILMMAGIC; AURELIEN MEUNIER / WIREIMAGE.

Your focus shifts busy…with zone. Things finances around


to work after the someone freaky. with your boo the 11th to stay you’ll move full-steam toward
22nd when the YOU NEED: A have been worry-free when your goals as the month begins.
Sun moves into Pinterest binge unclear, but your social life Adam Driver } The New Moon in your sign on the
your zone of for home decor insight is ahead. amps up after the 11.19. 8 3 11th will give you a boost as you
routine. inspiration. YOU NEED: To 22nd.
work to complete a project that
YOU NEED: To LEO GUY: He’s build up your YOU NEED: To means a lot to you. Watch out for
stop stressing looking for a little squad! treat yourself as
a financial snafu on the 29th
and do you. extra affection VIRGO GUY: When well as you do
everyone else. LOVES: when confusion is high.
CANCER GUY: He’s this month. Get he flies off in Confident
like a kid in a handsy with a social butterfly LIBRA GUY: He. Is. Your year: Being fearless and
women with big
candy store. Lie full-body mode, remind Pumped. Get him aspirations. embracing your unique quirks has
back and let him massage, and him that your on the dance paid off this year. Trust that your
HATES:
call you his then have him warm cocoon floor, and take the vision is clear and strong, and
lolli-lolli-lollipop! return the favor. awaits him. lead in a tango. Scatterbrained
antics that keep being your most genuine
waste his time. self. It’ll pay off big-time. February
DREAM DATE: and August will bring romance,
An adrenaline- and June and October are your
LIBRA
LEO
CANCER

pumping best times for travel.


VIRGO

challenge where
he can impress You need: To find the right
you with his balance between innovating and
daring. taking care of responsibilities.
WIN HIM OVER: BEST MATCHES
By making time
Virgo: You share the same
for long, intense
convos and overarching goals in life and are
slow, sweet equally dedicated to making your
kisses with him. biggest dreams (and hottest
fantasies!) come true.
Capricorn: Your serious and
playful sides are perfectly
matched, making time shared
with friends a load of fun, and your
bond with each other makes one-
on-one time especially intimate.

NOVEMBER 2015 _ COSMOPOLITAN _ 251


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COSMO QUIZ
Should You
Loosen Up?
1. On the way to
meet a friend at
your favorite
diner, she texts
you about trying
the new Thai joint
instead. You text:
a. “Sure! Or that
Chinese place?? Or
sushi? idk now!!”
b. “Um…okay! I
hate spicy food, but
I’ll just fill up on rice.”
c. “I can’t really
say yes because Mostly As: LIGHT
that’ll validate your AS A FEATHER
last-minute plan A lovable space case,
changing and you you’re down for what-
know I hate that. ever. But you’re easily
Also, I need disco influenced and have a
fries.” 4. At parties, tough time committing
you can usually to a stance on anything.
2. As a be found: Instead of giving in to
the whims of your BFFs,
bridesmaid, you a. Chatting with listen to your gut once in
generally fulfill a random girl behind a while. Picking the
your duties with: you in the bathroom brunch spot doesn’t
line…and leaving make you Stalin.
a. Oh shit, do I the friend you
have duties? brought to fend for Mostly Bs:
b. Gritted teeth… herself. RESENTFULLY

U T T E R C R E D I T T E E K AY I N FO R M AT I O N W G U T T E R C R E D I T T E E K AY T E E K AY
and one too many b. In your tight-
glasses of cham-
FLEXIBLE
knit clique, quietly You pride yourself on
pagne. shit-talking other going with the flow. But
c. Multiple Gmail people in the room. when the current takes
chains to all seven c. Starting an you upstream and you’re
other bridesmaids intense debate over headed down, you can
with an attached the Iran deal with be one cranky tadpole.
Excel of bachelorette some dude who’d Rather than saying yes
party responsibili- just asked you if you when you want to say
ties. wanted a Stella. no, try prioritizing
what’s worth compro-
3. Of the three mising on (bachelorette
5. Your dude is tees) and what’s not
female Friends, trying to get you (matching neon
you relate the to blow off work bachelorette tees).
most to: and go away for
a. Phoebe, due to a long weekend Mostly Cs: STIFF
her total lack of a life AS A BOARD
plan.
with him. Your If you were any tighter,
response?
T TA ER RK CR ROEPD/ TI TH ET EL IECKEANYSIINNFGOPRRMO AJ TE ICOTN. C: OGM

you’d be a Hemsworth’s
b. Rachel, for
a. “Just a week- abs. You are loyal and
being an alpha in Girl
end?! Let’s go to stick to your guns, which
World.
Burning Man!” shows a strong sense of
c. Monica, self. But when your pals
because—OMG, b. “I’ve got a ton fail to meet your
to do at work this NEW MOTTO:
WHO JUST SPILLED GO WHEREVER standards, you can be a
THAT?! week, but...sure?” THE PARTY little judge-y and
PANTS
c. “Some of us TAKE YOU. alienate them. So relax a
have responsibili- bit, and try to learn how
ties. There’s the to bend! Chill ain’t just
G LUM

door.” sweater weather.


E

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