Mentoring with DISC Style
by Kathy Wentworth Drahosz and Nicole Bridge
FOUNDATIONS OF YOUR PARTNERSHIP
As a mentoring consultant who specializes in
the area of organizational development, I have CONTENTS
spent the past two decades coaching countless
mentoring relationships at all stages of their Isolating DISC Strengths 2
development, from matching behavioral styles
and launching partnerships to maintaining the
connection between them for the duration of Why Study Behavioral Style? 3
their mentoring program. In my studies, clear
patterns have emerged that tell a tale of what DISC Style Breakdown 4-5
makes some partnerships thrive with chemistry
and productivity while others fizzle or never
even get off the ground. Natural Style v. Adapted Style 6
Believe it or not, the formula is actually quite The DISC in Action 7
simple: the most successful partnerships involve
two people who appreciate and trust one Using DISC as a Guide for
another’s commonalities and differences.
Mentoring Meetings 8
In a mentoring relationship there are ways you
can tailor your DISC communication style so that Planning an Agenda 9
you quickly put each other at ease and find
satisfaction in the mentoring experience. Conclusion 10
In this executive summary, we will delve deeply
into the issue of building trust with your partner
by understanding and respecting DISC behavioral
styles and communication preferences, and how
incorporating DISC will improve the mentoring DISC Behavorial Science
process for both participants.
“The DISC behavioral science
enables mentoring partnerships
from different career paths,
generations, and genders
to learn about each other,
appreciate differences and
quickly establish long-term
trusting relationships.”
© Dr. Ron Bonnstetter
~Kathy Wentworth Drahosz
Copyright © 2019, The Training Connection, Inc . All
rights reserved. No part of this guide may be reproduced
or distributed in any form without the express consent of
The Training Connection, Inc.
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Mentoring with DISC Style
Isolating DISC Strengths
ISOLATING DISC STRENGTHS
When you first meet your mentoring partner, it’s weekly staff meetings and give feedback on various
sometimes difficult to determine whether or not writing projects, deadline issues and changes.
you will have chemistry and authentically trust Although she starts each week with a plan, she
each other. You may be asking yourself: often has to juggle a variety of tasks and meetings
to accommodate schedule changes and special
• What do we have in common? requests.
• Will I like them?
• Will they like me? Once a month she meets with the rest of the
• What makes them perform so well? management team to discuss new priorities and
• How are they able to put others at ease so share strategies. The other managers are talkative
quickly? and have known each other for a long time, often
socializing after work or on the weekends. They
Once you get to know the other person, can speak easily about their upcoming projects and
you might find yourself matched with a defend their schedule projections and changes with
mentoring partner who struggles with building ease.
relationships. You might soon realize their
reserved nature will not only impact the success When we consider Kate’s professional experience
of your mentoring partnership but also their and work style, it is no surprise that management
own success on the job. may be a difficult fit. The nature of the work makes
her feel disorganized and out of control. Speaking
Understanding and respecting preferences is with employees, peers and key stakeholders all
vital to how you are received by your mentoring day long is draining and painful. Her colleagues
partner but also people in your professional are confident and personable, making her seem
environment. The more you know about dull and unsure of herself by comparison. She is
navigating varied displays of interpersonal overwhelmed by her stress, making her think “I’m a
communication, the better equipped you are to dedicated employee with a strong work ethic. Why
convey your authentic self and build long lasting isn’t this working?”
and productive relationships.
Kate’s story is common not only in management but
Let’s consider Kate, a very bright editor of in a variety of disciplines. Employees find a path
technical manuals. Kate is a focused, methodical to promotion totally outside of their comfort zone,
worker, thought to be quiet and shy by her making them feel weak and off-balance. What’s
co-workers. She sits at a neat desk in a less more is that they struggle to adapt their tendencies
traveled corner of the office where there are few and preferences to those of their mentors, peers,
interruptions to break her concentration. As she colleagues and even their bosses.
works through each manuscript, she follows her
task list closely and in order, corresponding with Moving through career advancements may be
colleagues primarily by email. challenging but success is within reach if you take
time for some simple study of both your personal
Through her talent and hard work, she secures a preferences and those of the ones around you.
coveted management position. Quickly, however,
Kate realizes the pace and demands of this new
role fall far outside her comfort zone. In order to
keep her team on task she needs to run
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Mentoring with DISC Style
Why Study Behavioral Style?
WHY STUDY BEHAVIORAL STYLE?
The first step in this study is understanding the help people understand their preferences and use
modes of communication and the intensity you that knowledge to improve their own relationships
display of each. The DISC method is based on and resulting experiences.
the intensity of four traits in each of us:
In 1940, psychologist Walter Clark used this theory
How you approach challenges (Dominance). to create the first DISC Profile, which quickly gained
How you deal with people (Influence). popularity in professional circles as a way to evaluate
How you deal with pace and consistency job applicants.
(Steadiness).
How you deal with policies and procedures When an agricultural salesman in Iowa named Bill
(Compliance). Bonnstetter began applying these principles to his
research on farmers’ buying habits, the impact on
Understanding our behavioral styles affords us his own sales work was so powerful that he used the
some flexibility. While personalities are generally DISC model to help people in other fields understand
fixed, behaviors adjust depending on our their clients. In 1984, Bonnstetter and his son, David,
circumstances. took their knowledge and passion for studying and
applying human behavior and created a company
For example, if your neighbor is chatty, even originally called Target Training International.
though your preference might be to take out Later renamed TTI Success Insights, they applied
the garbage quickly and head straight back to Marston’s foundation to modern organizations,
the house, every now and then you might stop helping managers to place employees in positions
and chat about the weather, —even if it makes that would maximize their talent and positively
you uncomfortable— because you don’t want impact the organization. Bill and David were the
to hurt their feelings. You think it’s important to first to computerize the DISC assessment, enabling
have a good relationship with your neighbor. people all over the world to access and apply DISC in
their relationships.
Similarly, studying the four DISC components
and their intensity in our own behavioral style What Do the Styles Mean?
helps us understand how to adapt to different Before we delve into the kinds of tendencies and
situations in order to maintain effective traits associated with each style, understand that
communication and happier relationships. It’s each of us demonstrates varying intensities of every
encouraging to realize that our behavioral styles single DISC style. Your DISC profile categorizes your
cannot be reduced to a cemented category but behavioral style as a D, I, S or C, based on your most
that, instead, we have control over the way we dominant or core factor, though all four factors play
perform in professional situations, even those a role in making up your true behavioral style. The
that make us feel stretched. comprehensive nature of the DISC profile helps you
to understand your tendencies as the communicator
The DISC Behavioral Science but also your value to the team and ideal work
The idea that our behaviors are always evolving environment.
originated from Dr. William Moulton Marston’s
research on the way emotions influence our
actions. In his 1928 book, “Emotions of Normal
People,” he developed a behavioral science
based on four quadrants that he believed would
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Mentoring with DISC Style
DISC Style Breakdown
DISC STYLE BREAKDOWN
A Note on the Energy Line When discussing human behavior, many tend to
As mentioned earlier, we each have some level of speak to the highs— referring to a person as a
intensity of all four DISC styles inside of us. The High D, High I, High S or High C. In truth, however,
bold line that cuts across your DISC graph, known “high” simply means a person’s plot point is
as “the energy line,” is the basis for measuring above the energy line.
that intensity. Intensity of behaviors is measured
by how far above or below the midpoint, or Consider, Dana who loves being in a group and
energy line, that behavior falls. It’s important always has a funny story to share — you know
to understand that a very low factor is just as she is a High I! Her motto is “strangers are just
significant as a factor that is very high. As an friends I haven’t met yet.”
example, a person who does not feel confident
responding to problems and challenges on the fly However, to really understand the science of
(Low D) is as significant as a person who prefers DISC we need to look at an individual’s behavior
clear instructions and details (High C). holistically (not only the High D, I, S or C) but
also the intensity of the low factors and their
Think of the energy line as the surface of a relationship to the energy line. The further away
swimming pool. Above the surface, a good from the energy line the more intense and visible
bounce on the diving board provides momentum their style will be to others.
for the dive. But you don’t stop working once
you hit the water- you keep your body in strong That Dana is also fiercely independent and prefers
form as you pass through the surface and glide to take her own approach to work (sometimes
through the water. You don’t slow down until away from the group’s standards) tells us her C is
you hit the bottom of the pool. below the energy line and that she may need to
be careful that her comfort level with challenging
the status quo doesn’t become an obstacle to her
Your behavioral style isn’t just about what own success.
happens above the energy line. What’s happening
at and below the line is equally important. If your Here are some characteristics of each style that
D is way below the energy line, you are likely you might observe in your own professional
sensitive to confrontation and demands for faster relationships or even in yourself:
work output. If your D is above the energy line,
you are at your best in situations that require D- Dominance
quick problem-solving and directness. If your D The High D prefers to lead the group. They
hovers at the energy line, — just a little below soar when they have the opportunity to do
or even a little above — you might be flexible in something daring or make a difficult decision.
this area, meaning, you can build a business case High Ds are driven to make things happen,
before making a decision and step on the pedal if which can often come across as demanding or
needed. urgent. Others will notice that they are:
Recognizing the Styles
Even if you do not have the opportunity to read • Results oriented
your co-workers’ assessments, DISC styles are • Competitive
highly observable. The way we communicate, • Problem solvers
hold ourselves, and our expectations of those • Risk takers
around us all say something about our DISC
tendencies and preferences.
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Mentoring with DISC Style
DISC Style Breakdown
DISC STYLE BREAKDOWN
On the opposite end of the spectrum, Low S- Steadiness
D’s tend to work in an organized environment The High S exudes a laid back and relaxed
using traditional procedures, prefer limited style. Stability and harmony are of utmost
authority, and pursue a calculated approach importance to them. They are loyal
to problem solving. These individuals tend to teammates and logical thinkers. The High S
have a long fuse and be slow to anger. Others enjoys the opportunity to serve and will be
will notice that they are: calm under fire. Others will notice that they
• Leary of extremes are:
• Methodical
• Conservative • Steady
• Calculating • Reliable
• Calm
I- Influencer • Methodical
The High I strives for likeability. They can
see the best in everyone and try to make
it work even with the most difficult co- The Low S, on the other hand, is fast paced,
workers or colleagues. They are effortless adaptable to change, very spontaneous and
conversationalists and always find a way to leans toward variety in the workplace. Unlike
relate others. The High I’s playful nature and their counterparts, Low S’s are emotional and
good sense of humor makes it easy for them easy to read and often “wear their hearts on
to recruit allies. Others will notice that they their sleeves.” Others will notice that they are:
are:
• Energetic
• Optimistic • Multifaceted
• People-oriented • Passionate
• Outgoing • Able to switch gears frequently
• Charismatic
C- Compliance
The High C prefers complete data and clear
Conversely, Low I’s tend to be reserved in rules to follow. They rely on methods that are
their interaction with others. They have the proven and prefer a safe work environment.
ability to persuade with data and facts and The High C asks a lot of questions in order to
are comfortable working alone or on projects get the full story. Others will notice that they
that give them a sense of autonomy. Low I’s are:
appreciate traditional approaches to doing
things and will want a strong business case • Disciplined
of why to change if the process has been • Detail-oriented
working. In other words, they lean toward the • Careful
premise that they must be convinced before • Systematic
they will trust. Others will notice that they
are: In contrast, a Low C often demonstrates a
commitment to independence, is a bold risk
• Fact and information-oriented taker, and believes that the fewer rules there
• Logical are to follow the better. Low Cs are fearless
• Insightful and will break the rules but will expect
• Observant forgiveness if the risks they have taken do not
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Mentoring with DISC Style
Natural Style v. Adapted Style
NATURAL STYLE V. ADAPTED STYLE
prove worthwhile. Others will notice that
they are: Limit morning
chit chat
• Independent
• Prone to taking risks D I S C
• Courageous 100
• Relentless
90
Natural Style v. Adapted Style
In addition to examining the intensity of each 80
style in your profile, the DISC assessment 70
measures the way you change your behaviors in
order to fit in your environment. Natural style 60
reflects your hard-wiring: the behaviors you
50
lean on most frequently and with the greatest
ease. Adapted style refers to the behaviors you 40
force yourself to change in the workplace in
order to succeed. You might limit morning chit 30
chat if your cubicle mate is a High D or include 20
a budget tracker in your status updates if your Include
boss is a High C. Understanding the preferences 10 status updates
of those around you will assure them of your 0
competence and make working together much 95 38 13 58
easier. High D: Cubical Mate
On the flip side, while your ability to adapt is D I S C
commendable, too much adapting can be an 100
energy drain. Consider, for example, a High 90
D who delivers a direct bottom line but feels
required to stop and compose carefully worded 80
emails to accommodate a High S colleague 70
who prefers thorough background information.
The High D might be meeting the High S’s 60
expectations, but the extra effort is tiring. If
50
the High D is reporting back to the High S for
the duration of a long-term project, finding the 40
energy to write these lengthy detailed messages
might leave the High D fatigued and maybe even 30
agitated. 20
Managers who are looking to avoid employee 10
burnout can use the DISC assessments to plan 0
teams and organize projects. The goal is to place 35 10 93 98
each employee in a position where they can High C: Boss
shine based on their natural styles.
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Mentoring with DISC Style
The DISC in Action
THE DISC IN ACTION
Now that we have a better understanding of A High C and a Low C — Because the High
the preferences associated with each style, let’s C and the Low C are both task-oriented, the
consider how DISC can be used to build a strong area of potential conflict lies within the scope
mentoring partnership. In the same way that of compliance and risk taking. The risk-averse
DISC study illuminates strategies for recognizing High C competes with the Low C’s need for
differences in behavior, attention to style independence which can many times cause a
preferences can help to build chemistry within considerable amount of tension. The High C will
your mentoring relationship and put your partner need to give the Low C honest feedback if they
at ease. are tackling problems with little regard for the
possible ramifications of a quick decision.
Working with an Opposite Style
Sometimes, you might be paired with someone USING DISC TO DESIGN DEVELOPMENTAL
because of their career trajectory or technical ACTIVITIES
expertise but find that you do not share much
else in common. Here are some ideas for working No matter which style each partner brings to
with a partner whose style feels in opposition to the relationship, savvy mentors will look for
your own: opportunities to move the mentoring meetings
beyond philosophical chats and/or venting
A High D and a Low D — For the High D adapting sessions. In other words, mentors should engage
to the Low D: Slow down. Drop the intensity. the mentoree in a variety of situations and
Create a safe learning environment. If the Low D developmental experiences to maximize learning.
feels calm and comfortable, they are more likely
to admit “I don’t know” or “This is where I need To keep your mentoree engaged, consider their
help.” Low Ds like lessons to follow and a forum to DISC style (both highs and lows) when designing
discuss problem-solving options. development activities. For example:
A High I and a Low I — Outwardly, these two High D’s, High C’s or Low I’s — Tend to put tasks
styles share very little in common— one is people- before people, so they struggle with interpersonal
oriented and the other is task-oriented. One tends skills. If the goal is to enhance people skills, ask
to trust indiscriminately while the other tends to your mentoree to consider investing one day
remain guarded and untrusting. The High I will each month listening to the concerns and needs
have to respect the Low I’s low trust level and of his/her employees or peers. Encourage the
will need to seek to build trust gradually. Ask the mentoree to look for opportunities to help talk
Low I for their input while planning development someone through a difficult project.
activities and for their impressions on how
comfortable they are with stretch assignments. High I’s or High S’s — These two behavioral styles
have trouble setting clear standards and holding
A High S and a Low S — In this relationship, others accountable — particularly people over
someone who prefers to think things through whom they do not have authority. In this case,
(High S) needs to work with someone who moves the goal would be to work with your mentoree
quickly. The High S will need to pick up the pace to create a project management system for
when communicating with the Low S: cover only following up on outstanding tasks and action
the high points and strive for directness. items.
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Mentoring with DISC Style
Using DISC as a Guide for Mentoring Meetings
USING DISC AS A GUIDE FOR MENTORING MEETINGS
Low S’s or High D’s —These two styles tend
to struggle with maintaining emotional
intelligence during difficult times/situations.
The ideal developmental activity would be to
identify someone for the mentoree to shadow
who is going to lead a team through a difficult
conversation about a failed project.
Low D’s, High S’s or High C’s — These styles need Using DISC as a Guide for Mentoring
time to think things through before making a Meetings
decision or taking a risk. To help build confidence When meeting with a High D or High C: Expect these
in decision-making and risk-taking, encourage meetings to be brief and to the point. Be sure to show
your mentoree to journal about what holds up on time and be prepared to dive into business.
them back from making a decision. At your next
mentoring meeting, discuss the pros and cons When meeting with a High I: Provide a friendly and
of the decision and an action plan for moving fun environment. Give them plenty of time to talk.
forward. Remember they get pretty excited about things – lots
of things – so you might need to ground them a little.
When meeting with a High S: Just like the High
I’s, they need a friendly environment. Don’t rush
headlong into business, give them a chance to break
the ice and warm up to you. Always give them time to
think things through. Be sure to send an agenda ahead
of the meeting so they know what topics you would
like to discuss.
When meeting with a High C: Be sure to show up on
time and stick to business. Don’t expect the meeting
to run a full hour if they run out of things to discuss. Be
careful of appearing too lighthearted, casual or showy
and be sure to follow through on your promises. Just
like the High S’s, they will appreciate an agenda sent
ahead of time.
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Mentoring with DISC Style
Planning an Agenda
PLANNING AN AGENDA
Sample Agenda
To give you a better handle on how this might
work, see the below sample agenda for a High S
or High C meeting:
Sample: Mentoring Meeting Agenda
Purpose: Develop skills in conflict management
and resolution.
Agenda Items
Topics for the mentoree:
• Share a supervisor-related problem.
One of the most immediate ways to acknowledge • What are the obstacles to confronting the
your partner’s different styles is to use the DISC problem?
model to design your next meeting agenda.
Consider how your partner’s preferences play into Questions for the mentor:
the way they receive information.
• How do you handle conflict?
Here are some tips: • Have you ever had to confront your
supervisor?
High D’s most easily absorb direct and to-the- • What slows you down?
point updates. Be sure to include a polished set • What in my DISC holds me back from
of bullet points. confronting someone?
• What tips do you have?
High I’s like to see creative presentations that
include illustrations and opportunities for Insights Gained:
participation.
Next meeting schedule: ____________________
High S’s often struggle with asking for help and Purpose of the meeting: ___________________
benefit from space within the meeting to process
the information and share needs and requests.
High C’s prefer precise details and the context for
each initiative.
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Mentoring with DISC Style
Conclusion
CONCLUSION
Key Takeaways
• Respect and value the differences that each
style brings to the table.
• Remember the lows are just as important as the
highs.
• Adjust your communication style to put your
partner at ease.
• Consider their style when determining
development activities for your partner.
• Manage your meetings with DISC in mind.
We have now studied DISC through several
different lenses:
• Head on with the communication
preferences associated with the highs and
lows of each style.
• From the perspective of someone who is
stretched too far outside of their natural CEO and People Developer
style.
• And within a partnership between two
seemingly polar opposites.
The hope is that you will be able to apply this
information two-fold, both in recognizing your
own strengths and behavioral tendencies and in
relating to your mentoring partner.
Our DISC style speaks volumes about the
situations under which we are most likely
to succeed. But, of course, we often don’t
have complete control over our professional
circumstances such as who we work for, what
projects are assigned to us, and sometimes even
our mentoring partnerships. For more information:
Understanding you and your partner’s styles will Kathy Wentworth Drahosz
help both of you identify opportunities where [email protected]
each of you can thrive and find the utmost
satisfaction from your mentoring experience.
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Mentoring with DISC Style
NOTES
NOTES
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Mentoring with DISC Style
NOTES
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