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Professional Email Analysis: Great and Poor Communication Evaluated

Careem Barrett

University of the People

COM 2001-01 Professional Communication

Aziz Obidov

July 10, 2025

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Professional Email Analysis: Great and Poor Communication Evaluated

Introduction

Email is a ubiquitous means of communication in the modern workplace. The way

professionals write and respond to emails goes far in their credibility, office politics, and

productivity. This task entails a comparison between two professional email templates: great and

bad. They are both analyzed based on paramount qualities of professional communication:

clarity, tone, organization, and protocol. We offer suggestions for enhancements and conclude by

emphasizing the importance of mastering the art of email communication.

Excellent Email Analysis

Sample Context: The following email was sent from a project manager to his team,

announcing the upcoming phase of a project and requesting confirmation of specific tasks.

1. Subject Line

Subject: "Next Steps: Project Aurora—Task Assignment for Q3"

This heading is concise, specific, and simple for the recipient to understand the intention

of the mail at first glance. According to Ashman (2018), clear communication ensures messages

are well received by the target audience.

2. Greetings and Sign-offs

They begin the letter with "Good morning, Team," and end it with "Best regards,

[Name]." They are respectful and team-oriented, beginning on a courteous note and bringing the

team together (Ashman, 2018).

3. Tone
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The tone of the message is one that is positive, courteous, and forceful. The manager is

expressing appreciation for past effort and making very clear what is expected in terms of future

action. This email is an exhibit of emotional intelligence, professionalism, and adherence to the

use of language tailoring according to audience needs (Gross et al., n.d.).

4. Conciseness

The mail is concise, and bullet points are employed in the event of deadlines and action

items, and hence it is readable. There is no unnecessary content, and every paragraph has a

purpose. As per Oaks’ (n.d.) theory, maintaining the writing clear and structured ensures

avoidance of misunderstanding and easy facilitation of communication.

5. Grammar and Spelling

There are no errors in grammar and spelling in the message. Proper file naming and

formatting also guarantee the email's clarity (Ashman, 2018).

6. Attachments and Formatting

A project timeline attachment was mentioned in the body and explained in detail: "Please

see the attached Project Timeline_Q3.pdf." Proper reference to attachments and file naming

helps to rightly organize the message and user experience (Gross et al., n.d.).

7. Privacy

The mail was drafted from the BCC field as needed to prevent reply-all loops and

maintain privacy. The action is an indicator of digital communication skills (Ashman, 2018).

8. Timeliness

The reminder was sent two days before the deadline, enough time for members to

prepare. The manager also provided a response deadline: "Please mark your tasks by Wednesday

at noon."
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Strengths: Positive tone, clearness, well-organized content, following the format, and

punctuality.

Areas for Minor Improvement: Adding a follow-up date would assist with responsibility.

Problematic Email Analysis

The department head wrote this email to one of the junior staff members who was

requested to complete an assignment in haste. The email was unclear, not professional, and

confusing.

1. Subject Line

Subject: "Hey—Quick Thing"

Subject line is informal and confusing. It lacks purpose of message or urgency; thus, it is

not effective in business emails (Gross et al., n.d.).

2. Greetings and Closings

Greeting starts with a "Hey" and lacks a closing sentence and signature. Such informality

and lack of personalization undermine the authority and precision needed in hierarchical

communication (Ashman, 2018).

3. Tone

The tone is assertive and commanding, for instance, using phrases like "Need this done

ASAP" without offering context or acknowledgment. Oaks (n.d.) explains how tone can

influence how messages are received, and this email will most likely be interpreted as insulting.

4. Brevity

The concise message is also missing key details like the task, due date, and level of

urgency. Conciseness in a lack of clarity leaves space for misinterpretation (Gross et al., n.d.).

5. Grammar and Spelling

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There are several grammar and punctuation errors in the message: "Can you send me that

report as soon as possible? Thank you." Abbreviations like "u" and "thx" are not professional in

business emails (Ashman, 2018).

6. Attachments and Formatting

No attachment was given. The email lacked proper paragraph formatting and

punctuation, which decreased its readability. punctuation, which decreased its readability.

7. Privacy

The email was addressed to multiple people in the "To" field, resulting in too many reply-

all messages. There was no clarity on whether confidential information should stay confidential.

8. Timeliness

The email was sent late at night with an unwritten assumption of a quick response. No

prior context or decent time frame was given in advance, which is a respect deficit on the side of

the recipient's calendar and time (Oaks, n.d.).

Recommendations for Improvement

To turn this email into a better professional and effective communication tool, the following

are suggested:

• Topic Line: Rewrite to "Request: Q2 Sales Report Due Tomorrow" to clearly indicate

the request and due date (Gross et al., n.d.).

• Greeting and Closing: Begin with "Dear [Name]" and end with "Thank you, [Your

Name]" for professional courtesy (Ashman, 2018).

• Tone: Use a polite tone, such as, "Would it be possible to send the Q2 sales report

tomorrow at 10 a.m.? Thank you for your help." This is aligned with using business tone

and rapport (Oaks, n.d.).

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• Structure and Details: Determine what report is needed, when, and why. Use correct

sentence order and paragraph structure (Gross et al., n.d.).

• Grammar and Clarity: Avoid abbreviations and textual speak. Check spelling and

punctuation (Ashman, 2018).

• Avoid sending late-night emails because they are urgent but without notice. Use realistic,

visible deadlines (Oaks, n.d.).

These adjustments would enhance the message to be respectful, clear, and actionable, thereby

improving workplace communication and preserving professional relationships.

Conclusion

This discussion points out how professional emails—when done professionally—will

improve clarity, develop respect, and improve efficiency in the workplace. The exemplary email

captured best practices in timing, presentation, and tone, while the offending email was a

demonstration of how impropriety and ambiguity cause confusion. Effective e-mail

communication hinges on professionalism, clarity, and respect for others' privacy and time

(Ashman, 2018; Gross et al., n.d.; Oaks, n.d.). Since email is still a cornerstone of business

communication, proficiency in its etiquette remains key to career and workplace success.
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References

Ashman, M. (2018). Introduction to professional communications. BCcampus.

https://opentextbc.ca/professionalcomms/

Gross, A., Hamlin, A., Merck, B., Rubio, C., Naas, J., Savage, M., & DeSilva, M. (n.d.). 2.3

Adapting your writing to meet your audience’s needs. In Technical writing. Open Oregon

Educational Resources. https://openoregon.pressbooks.pub/technicalwriting/

Oaks, S. (n.d.). Cultural Context. In Communication for professionals. Lumen Learning.

https://courses.lumenlearning.com/communicationforprofessionals/