SIX – THE MUSICAL – Script Excerpt.

Song ‘Six’

[Catherine Of Aragon:]
He got down on one knee
But I said "No way!"
Packed my bags
And moved into a
Nu-nu-nunnery!
Joined the gospel choir
Our riffs were on fire
At the top of the charts
Is where I'm gonna stay

[Anne Boleyn:]
Henry sent me a poem
All about my green sleeves
I changed a couple words
Put it on a sick beat
The song blew their minds
Next minute I was signed
And now I'm writing lyrics
For Shakesy P

[Jane Seymour:]
Since my first son
Our family's grown
We made a band
And got quite well known
You could perhaps call us
The Tudor Von Trapps
I'm just kidding
We're called the
Royalling Stones

[All:]
We're one of a kind
No category
Too many years
Lost in history
We're free to take
Our crowning glory
For five more minutes
We're SIX!

[Anne Of Cleves:]
What a shame
Yeah, my face

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It cost me the crown
So I moved to the
Haus Of Holbein!
In my hometown
His mates were super arty
But I showed them how to party
Now on my tour of Prussia
Everybody "Gets down"

[Katherine Howard:]
Music man tried it on
And I was like "Bye!"
So I thought "Who needs him?
I can give it a try"
I learned everything
Now all I do is sing
And I'll do that until I die

[Catherine Parr:]
Heard all about these rockin' chicks
Loved every song
And each remix
So I went out and found them
And we laid down an album
Now "I don't need your love"
All I need is SIX!

[All:]
We're one of a kind
No category
Too many years
Lost in his story
We're free to take
Our crowning glory
For five more minutes
We're SIX!
Woah, woah
We're SIX!
Woooah, we're SIX
Woah, woah
For five more minutes

It's the end of the show

Of the historemix
We switched up the flow
And we changed the prefix
Everybody knows
That we used to be six wives
But we want to say

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Before we drop the curtain
Nothing is for sure
Nothing is for certain
All that we know is that
We used to be six wives

But now we're one of a kind

No category
Too many years
Lost in history
We're free to take
Our crowning glory
For five more minutes...
We're one of a kind
No category
Too many years
Lost in history
We're free to take
Our crowning glory
For five more minutes
We're SIX!
Woah, woah
We're SIX!
Woooah, we're SIX
Woah, woah
For five, four, three
Two, one more minute

We're SIX!

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GIRLS LIKE THAT – Script Excerpt.

Scene Four

7.40 mins – 9.22 minutes.

A: Us girls are sitting in history, not listening to Mrs. McMuffin breath rambling on about voting
or suffering jets or something, when it comes

B: Buzz

C: Click

D: Pop

E: Flash

B: An email

C: A tweet

B: And the classroom is bright as the phones come alive. And it’s not like I was the only one
checking

C: Everyone got it, so it’s not just me like…

D: Which is why when I… like, it wouldn’t have changed anything

A: A photo of Scarlett, naked

B: Buzz

C: Click

D: Pop

E: Flash

B: OMG!

C: What a little slut

D: What a little skank

C: When the chickens start going for each other, like really going for each other, they can draw
blood and that when, that’s when you need to be really careful because if they see blood – the other
chickens, they’ll keep pecking until there’s more blood and more. So, you have to get this antiseptic
spray that sprays purple, so the chickens don’t notice the red blood. I don’t know why, it’s
something to do with a vulnerable chicken puts the whole flock at risk, or something.

D: And it’s funny

E: And it’s kind of sexy

B: And it’s ugly

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A: And so I…

B: And so I…

C: And so I…

All: Delete

All sigh

D: And it’s over

E: Except I don’t

A: Because someone else will

B: Someone else will, definitely anyway

C: So I…

D: Forward

E: Click

A: Post

B: Tweet

C: Poke

D: Send

E: Buzz

A: Click

B: Pop

C: Flash

D: And it’s not my idea to sent the photo out in the first place

E: If the photo was taken, and no one was there to see it, was it really taken? I mean, didn’t
Plato or someone say that?

A: And there’s a rumour that the school internet crashes from all the activity

B: There’s a rumour that makes no sense whatsoever, since obviously no one’s allowed to use
the school internet on their phones and they’re using 3G

A: But what is definitely true is that within three minutes of receiving the photo in the middle
of Miss saying something about a woman who got tied up to parliament – some 50 shades crap or
something… everyone in school has acquired the photo

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RUBY MOON

Scene 4

6
WAITING FOR GODOT

Scene 1 – pages 1-4

INTO THE WOODS

‘Your Fault’

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[BAKER, spoken]
It's because of you there's a giant in our midst, and my wife is dead!

[JACK]
But it isn't my fault
I was given those beans!
You persuaded me to trade away
My cow for beans!
And without those beans
There'd have been no stalk
To get up to the giants
In the first place!

[BAKER]
Wait a minute—
Magic beans
For a cow so old
That you had to tell
A lie to sell
It, which you told!
Were they worthless beans?
Were they oversold?
Oh, and tell us who
Persuaded you
To steal that gold!

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD, to JACK]

See, it's your fault

[JACK]
No!

[BAKER]
So it's your fault

[JACK]
No!

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD]

Yes, it is!

[JACK]
It's not!

[BAKER]
It's true

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[JACK]
Wait a minute, but—
I only stole the gold
To get my cow back
From you!

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD, to BAKER]

So it's your fault!

[JACK]
Yes!

[BAKER]
No, it isn't!
I'd have kept those beans
But our house was cursed
She made us get a cow
To get the curse reversed!

[WITCH]
It's your father's fault
That the curse got placed
And the place got cursed
In the first place!

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD]

Oh
Then it's his fault!

[WITCH]
So...

[CINDERELLA]
It was his fault…

[JACK]
No

[BAKER]
Yes, it is
It's his

[CINDERELLA]
I guess…

[JACK]
Wait a minute, though—
I chopped down the beanstalk
Right? That's clear

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But without any beanstalk
Then what's queer
Is how did the second giant get down here
In the first place?
Second place…?

[CINDERELLA, spoken]
Yes!

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD, spoken]

How?

[BAKER, spoken]
Hmm…

[JACK]
Well
Who had the other bean?

[BAKER]
The other bean?

[CINDERELLA]
The other bean?

[JACK, to BAKER]
You pocketed the other bean

[BAKER]
I didn't!
Yes, I did

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD]

So it's your—!

[BAKER]
No, it isn't
'Cause I gave it to my wife!

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD]

So it's her—!

[BAKER]
No, it isn't!

[CINDERELLA]
Then whose is it?

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[BAKER]
Wait a minute!

[To CINDERELLA]

She exchanged that bean

To obtain your shoe
So the one who knows what happened
To the bean is you!

[CINDERELLA]
You mean that old bean—
That your wife—? Oh, dear—
But I never knew
And so I threw—
Well, don't look here!

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD]

So it's your fault!

[CINDERELLA]
But I didn't—

[JACK]
See, it's her fault—!

[CINDERELLA]
But she didn't say to me—

[JACK]
And it isn't mine at all!

[BAKER, to CINDERELLA]
But what?

[CINDERELLA, to Jack]
Well, if you hadn't gone
Back up again—

[JACK]
We were needy—

[CINDERELLA]
You were greedy!
Did you need that hen?

[JACK]
But I got it for my mother!

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[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD]
So it's her fault then!

[CINDERELLA]
Yes, and what about the harp
In the third place?

[BAKER]
The harp—yes!

[JACK, referring to LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD]

She went and dared me to!

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD]

I dared you to?

[JACK]
You dared me to!
She said that I was scared to
She dared me!

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD]

No, I didn't!

[BAKER, CINDERELLA & JACK]

So it's your fault!

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD]

Wait a minute—!

[CINDERELLA]
If you hadn't dared him to—

[BAKER, to JACK]
And you had left the harp alone
We wouldn't be in trouble
In the first place!

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD, to CINDERELLA]

Well, if you hadn't thrown away the bean
In the first place—!
It was your fault!

[CINDERELLA, referring to WITCH]

Well, if she hadn't raised them in the first place—!

[JACK, to WITCH]

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Yes, if you hadn't raised them in the first place—!

[LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD & BAKER, to WITCH]

Right! It's you who raised them in the first place—!

[CINDERELLA]
You raised the beans in the first place!

[JACK]
It's your fault!

[CINDERELLA, JACK, LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD & BAKER]

You're responsible!
You're the one to blame!
It's your fault!

MATILDA THE MUSICAL

‘When I Grow Up’

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When I grow up
(When I grow up, when I grow up)
I will be tall enough to reach the branches
That I need to reach to climb
The trees you get to climb
When you're grown up

And when I grow up

(When I grow up, when I grow up)
I will be smart enough to answer all
The questions that you need to know
The answers to
Before you're grown up

And when I grow up (And when I grow up)

I will eat sweets every day
On the way to work
And I will go to bed late every night

And I will wake up (And I will wake up)

When the sun comes up
And I will watch cartoons until my eyes go square

And I won't care

'Cause I'll be all grown up
When I grow up...
(When I grow up)

Even if you're little you can do a lot. You

Mustn't let a little thing like "little" stop you
(When I grow up)
If you sit around and let them get on top, you
Won't change a thing

Just because you find that life's not fair, it

Doesn't mean that you just have to grin and bear it
If you always take it on the chin and wear it
You might as well be saying
You think that it's okay
And that's not right!

And if it's not right

You have to put it right

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But nobody else is gonna put it right for me
Nobody but me is gonna change my story
Sometimes you have to be a little bit –

[MISS TRUNCHBULL]
Maggots!

[COMPANY]
– naughty!

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