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Reviews:

‘Yet another theatre tart whore trying to bring ruin to the Roman state. 0/10, do not recommend. This is why females shouldn’t be allowed to have Substack blogs.’ - Procopius of Caesarea, author of The Secret History and the Wars of Justinian

‘Not as good as a book I read recently about my dad’s exploits against the gross Franks but… Wait, what was that? I wrote that? Oh, well, then yeah I guess this will do.’ - Anna Komnena, author of The Alexiad

‘I won’t be writing a panegyric about her anytime soon, but her writing is good for a brain-rot doom-scroll sort of morning, I guess. Why are you calling me, anyway? I’ve got the Emperor on hold.’ - Libanius of Antioch, orator and teacher

‘Love what she’s doing for my reputation, but really not cool with the weird stan behaviour. I mean ‘Empress of Byzantium,’ really? Why are you so obsessed with me?’ - Theodora, (real) Empress of Byzantium

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