Hi, I’m Jeannie Ewing, the face behind this community. I’ve been writing and speaking for over ten years (mostly about grief) but pivoted to exploring the complexities and conversations surrounding motherhood about three years ago. It’s a joy to be walking alongside you, and my greatest hope is that you will always find comfort, safety, and belonging in this space.
Who is a Ghost Mother?
We are women who identify as mothers, whether or not we have biological children (and the men who love us), who long to be seen and valued not just for what we do, but for who we are.
Ghosts are wispy, translucent, and evasive. A Ghost Mother is one who replaces toilet paper, refills the bathroom hand soap, stocks the cupboards with cereal and canned goods, emails teachers, sends thank-you cards after birthdays, and purchases holiday gifts.
She lurks in the shadows and sidelines of her life, never fully feeling visible. This is a space for those who feel unseen to band in community and know that you are cared for and that you matter.
Ghost Mother sculpts the parts of motherhood that our culture tends to eradicate, through honest and vulnerable storytelling and by bearing witness to the gifts of our feminine genius that goes unacknowledged.
Why “Ghost Mother”?
I drafted an essay off the cuff in fall 2024. It was an ordinary Sunday afternoon, when my husband kneaded homemade pizza dough for dinner and my oldest daughter blurted that he deserved a break but I was never around.
My response was to huddle in my bedroom office and type all the ways I work behind the scenes while my kids are at school or when they are playing outside or sleeping. Somehow the phrase “ghost mother” popped into the essay, and I realized this phrase was a symbol of the absence mothers often feel but don’t always have language for.
Who This Is For:
This is not for the elite few. Instead, it’s open to mothers who have lost children, who feel ghosted by society, who have longed for children, who are estranged from their own mothers or daughters, and even for allies who want to lend a listening ear.
The Values of Our Ghost Mother Community:
Visibility: Here, we name and witness the unseen labor, grief, and erasure of mothers.
Compassion: We meet marginalized experiences with patience and presence.
Truth-telling: We refuse to sanitize or sugarcoat our stories, and we hold complexity for the paradoxes of both love and loss, holding space for all lived experiences.
Solidarity: We affirm that you are not alone in the haunting and lingering invisibility you feel in your life.
Dignity: We recognize mothers not as shadows, but as whole people, and we insist on acknowledging that the roles and responsibilities of our lives matter.
Tenderness and Strength: We elevate the soft and subtle alongside the fierce and resilient.
Memory and Legacy: We remember what and who we have lost (children, relationships, and identities) and keep alive what may otherwise vanish into silence.
Sacred Witness: We hold with reverence the practice of listening and honoring all stories and experiences.
What You’ll Get When You Subscribe:
Free Subscribers get:
One essay a month, written by me (Jeannie Ewing) and others in our Ghost Mother community (maybe even you) that are based on a thematic thread for the month.
Access to the full archive + comments on every post.
Paid Subscribers get all of the above, plus:
One subscriber-only confessional essay per month, which will delve more deeply into the month’s topic or theme.
Monthly Paradox Circles, which will be facilitated via Zoom for one hour and allow us to gather as an intimate community to share in a safe, open, and trusting environment the ways we experience ambivalence in our roles and responsibilities as mothers and how we can hold the “both/and” paradox in our everyday lives.
Access to a paid subscriber-only chat here on Substack, which will serve as a private discussion space for us to seek and offer support, build relationships, and stay connected on a deeper level.
Founding members get all benefits from the free + paid tiers, and:
30 minutes 1:1 with me to use any way you’d like—to share about what projects you’re working on, ask for feedback on a written piece, seek support if you’re going through something tough (I have a school counseling background), just chat to check in and get to know me, whatever.
Because you love me and you believe in the work of Ghost Mother.
A Final Farewell:
As this community evolves, I plan to offer paid subscribers quarterly Blacklight Sessions, which will be guided group explorations of hidden family and personal narratives. Writing workshops and both virtual and in-person retreats may develop, too, based on participation and the strength of commitment in our group.
Remember: In this space, women are seen and mothers are visible.
