Writing 2 Chapter 1

CHAPTER 1

PARAPHASING
I. INTRODUCTION
1. What is paraphrasing?
Paraphrase: Write it in Your Own Words
A paraphrase is...
 your own rendition of essential information and ideas expressed by someone
else, presented in a new form.
 one legitimate way (when accompanied by accurate documentation) to borrow
from a source.
 a more detailed restatement than a summary, which focuses concisely on a
single main idea.
Example:
(1) Tomorrow is Saturday! It is not necessary to get up early!

 As tomorrow is Saturday, we don’t have to get up early.

(2) Students frequently overuse direct quotation in taking notes, and as a
result they overuse quotations in the final [research] paper. Probably
only about 10% of your final manuscript should appear as directly
quoted matter. Therefore, you should strive to limit the amount of
exact transcribing of source materials while taking notes. Lester,
James D. Writing Research Papers. 2nd ed. (1976): 46-47.

 In research papers students often quote excessively, failing to keep

quoted material down to a desirable level. Since the problem usually originates
during note taking, it is essential to minimize the material recorded verbatim
(Lester 46-47).

2. Why paraphrasing?
Paraphrasing is a valuable skill because...
 it is better than quoting information from an undistinguished passage.
 it helps you control the temptation to quote too much.

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 the mental process required for successful paraphrasing helps you to grasp the
full meaning of the original.
3. How to paraphrase?
6 Steps to Effective Paraphrasing
1. Reread the original sentence/ passage until you understand its full meaning.
2. Set the original aside, and write your paraphrase on a note card.
3. Jot down a few words below your paraphrase to remind you later how you
envision using this material. At the top of the note card, write a key word or
phrase to indicate the subject of your paraphrase.
4. Check your rendition with the original to make sure that your version
accurately expresses all the essential information in a new form.
5. Use quotation marks to identify any unique term or phraseology you have
borrowed exactly from the source.
6. Record the source (including the page) on your note card so that you can credit
it easily if you decide to incorporate the material into your paper.

II. PARAPHRASING TECHNIQUES

A successful paraphrase is your own explanation or interpretation of another
person's ideas. Paraphrasing in academic writing is an effective way to restate,
condense, or clarify another author's ideas while also providing credibility to your
own argument or analysis. While successful paraphrasing is essential for strong
academic writing, unsuccessful paraphrasing can result in unintentional plagiarism.

When you write a paraphrase, you restate other’s ideas in your own words. That is,
you write the meaning of the author’s ideas. You use some of the author’s key terms,
but you use many of your own words and sentence structures. (You should also
include in‐text citation, including the author’s last name and year of publication).
Following are some techniques you can use to help you paraphrase. An effective
paraphrase includes more than one of these techniques. If you use only one of these
techniques when paraphrasing, you have not paraphrased effectively.

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1. Change a word from one part of speech to another

You can:
 Use an adverb instead of an adjective
 Use a verb to replace a noun
Example:
Original: Medical professor John Swanson says that global changes are influencing
the spread of disease.
Paraphrase: According to John Swanson, a professor of medicine, changes across the
globe are causing diseases to spread (James, 2004).

2. Use Synonyms
 Replace the original words with words
that mean the same.
Example:
Original: The U.S. government declared that the AIDS crisis poses a national
security threat.
Paraphrase: The government of the United States announced that AIDS could harm
the nation's security.
** When you can’t find a synonym, replace the original word with a definition.

Example:
Original: The stallion was content with the mare.
Paraphrase: The male horse was happy with the female horse.

3. Change numbers and percentages to different forms

Example:
Original: Minority groups in the United States have been hit hardest by the epidemic.
African Americans, who make up 13 percent of the U.S. population, accounted for 46
percent of the AIDS cases diagnosed in 1998.
Paraphrase: The AIDS epidemic has mostly affected minorities in the United States.
For example, in 1998, less than 15 percent of the total population was African, but

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almost half of the people diagnosed with AIDS in the United States that year were
African America (Jenson, 2000).

4. Change word order or sentence structures; use different sentence connectors

You can:
 change from active to passive voice and vice versa
 change from direct to indirect speech
 change sayings to conditional sentences
 move modifiers to different positions
 reduced clauses to phrases or improve phrases into clauses
 replace sentence connectors

Note: The passive voice is generally used in academic writing when the agent is
unknown or redundant, should be concealed, introduces new information (thematic) or
to provide objectivity (i.e., scientific voice).

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Example:
Original: After he studied, John took a nap.
Paraphrase: After studying, John took a nap.

Original: Mr. Lee said, “I am ready for lunch.”

Paraphrase: Mr. Lee said he was ready for lunch

Original: A hotel employee will carry your bags.

Paraphrase: Your bags will be carried by a hotel employee.

Original: Although only about one‐tenth of the world’s population lives there, sub‐
Saharan Africa remains the hardest hit region, accounting for 72 percent of the people
infected with HIV during 2000.
Paraphrase: Approximately 10 percent of the world’s population resides in sub‐
Saharan Africa. However, this area of the world has the highest percentage of AIDS‐
related illnesses. In fact, in 2000, almost three‐fourths of the population had the HIV
virus(Bunting, 2004).

5. Use different definition structures

Example:
Original: Lyme disease is an inflammatory disease caused by a bacterium transmitted
by ticks (small bloodsucking arachnids that attach themselves to larger animals).
The disease is usually characterized by a rash followed by flu‐like symptoms,
including fever, joint pain, and headache.

Paraphrase: Lyme disease‐a disease that causes swelling and redness‐is caused by a
bacterium carried by a small arachnid known as a tick. The ticks attach to and suck
the blood of animals and humans, transferring some of the Lyme disease bacteria
into their hosts and causing symptoms similar to the flu (Wald, 2005).

6. Do not change key terms or proper nouns

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Example:
Original: In the northeastern United States, people are building homes on the edge of
woods, where ticks that carry Lyme disease hitch rides on deer. In addition, in Africa,
hunters bring back the meat of animals that scientists think may transmit Ebola, a
usually fatal disease that causes massive hemorrhaging in its victims.
Paraphrase: In the United States, residential areas are being built near wooded areas in
the northeast. These areas are also the homes of ticks carrying Lyme disease. Also,
according to scientists, hunters in Africa kill animals that may carry the Ebola virus(an
often fatal virus that causes massive hemorrhaging)
(Yaya, 2004).
3. Avoid incorrect paraphrasing
The art of paraphrasing may sometime be done incorrectly.
Example:
Original passage:
Nobody called him Abe--at least not to his face--because he loathed the nickname. It
did not befit a respected professional who'd struggled hard to overcome the limitations
of his frontier background. Frankly Lincoln enjoyed his status as a lawyer and
politician, and he liked money, too, and used it to measure his worth. By the 1850's,
thanks to a combination of talent and sheer hard work, Lincoln was a man of
substantial wealth. He had an annual income of around $5,000--the equivalent of
many times that today--and large financial and real-estate investments.
Oates, Stephen B. Our Fiery Trial: Abraham Lincoln, John Brown, and the Civil War
Era. Amherst, MA: University of Massachusetts Press, 1979. p. 65
Incorrect paraphrase:
No one used Lincoln's nickname, Abe, because he detested it. It didn't go with a
lawyer and politician who had worked to get away from the restrictions of his country
heritage. Lincoln liked his new position, and his wealth, and used it to gauge his
status. By mid-century, his skill and labor had made him a fairly wealthy man. He had
a yearly income of approximately $5,000 - equal to several times that now - and hefty
business and land commitments.

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** This is incorrect because it uses the same basic structure as the original with some
word changes and does not credit the author.
Correct paraphrase:
By the middle of the century, Lincoln enjoyed life as a well-respected lawyer and
politician, having acquired a position of status and wealth that was well removed from
his early "frontier background". He now was bringing in $5,000 a year (this translates
to $87,500 in 1997 dollars [Derks, 2]), and had substantial "financial and real estate
investments". As a consequence, he disliked being called Abe because of its
association with his rural heritage. (Oates, 65)

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PARAPHRASING EXERCISE
Exercise 1: Paraphrase the following sentences, beginning the sentence with the
words in parentheses. What techniques have you used?
1. The people who were there can remember nothing unusual happening.
 Nobody……………………………………………………………………..
2. It was my refusal to obey the policeman that caused my arrest.
 It was because ………………………………………………………………
3. Aren’t they ever going to bring us the breakfast I ordered for 8 o’clock?
 Aren’t we ……………………………………………………………………..
4. I was very busy, I couldn’t go to the cinema.
 If ……………………………………………………………………..
5. Kathy is the only friend that Dolly has.
 Except……………………………………………………………………..
6. Rita doesn’t realize how serious her husband’s operation is going to be.
 Little ……………………………………………………………………..
7. The last time we when there was in 1998.
 We ……………………………………………………………………..
8. It is said that he escaped to a neutral country.
 He ……………………………………………………………………..
9. In spite of all our effort, we failed the competition.
 Although ……………………………………………………………………..
10. As your handwriting is illegible, the examiners cannot accept your paper.
 Provided ……………………………………………………………………..
11. I was not paying attention to the screen so I accidentally deleted some important
file on my computer.
 Because ………………………………………………….
12. "I don't have enough time", he complained.
 He complained ………………………………………………
13. The new manager seems to be a very capable woman. I met her last week.
 The new manager who …………………..
14. I can’ t remember the time of our appointment.

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 I can’t remember when …………………………………

15. It’s extremely difficult for us to make ends meet these days.
 We find ……………………………………………………………………….

Exercise 2: Write as many paraphrases as possible of each of the following

sentences. What techniques have you used?
1. Their attitude causes us great disappointment.
2. Doris thought the woman in front of her was her sister-in-law.
3. Driving fast í dangerous, whether you are an experienced driver or not.
4. Whenever I hear this song, I remember the time when I was in Paris.
5. The previous manager wasn’t running the club well, so he was replaced.
6. Do you think that climate affects people’s personalities?
7. Jack has become confident, as a result of his success.
8. Thanks for your reminding me about this meeting – otherwise I would have missed
it.
9. They left early because they didn’t want to get caught in the traffic.
10. Richard said that they had never had so much snow in this area before.

Exercise 3: Write a paraphrase of each of the following passages.

1. "The Antarctic is the vast source of cold on our planet, just as the sun is the source
of our heat, and it exerts tremendous control on our climate," [Jacques] Cousteau told
the camera. "The cold ocean water around Antarctica flows north to mix with warmer
water from the tropics, and its upwellings help to cool both the surface water and our
atmosphere. Yet the fragility of this regulating system is now threatened by human
activity." From "Captain Cousteau," Audubon (May 1990):17.
2. The twenties were the years when drinking was against the law, and the law was a
bad joke because everyone knew of a local bar where liquor could be had. They were
the years when organized crime ruled the cities, and the police seemed powerless to
do anything against it. Classical music was forgotten while jazz spread throughout the
land, and men like Bix Beiderbecke, Louis Armstrong, and Count Basie became the
heroes of the young. The flapper was born in the twenties, and with her bobbed hair

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and short skirts, she symbolized, perhaps more than anyone or anything else,
America's break with the past. From Kathleen Yancey, English 102 Supplemental
Guide (1989): 25.
3. Of the more than 1000 bicycling deaths each year, three-fourths are caused by head
injuries. Half of those killed are school-age children. One study concluded that
wearing a bike helmet can reduce the risk of head injury by 85 percent. In an accident,
a bike helmet absorbs the shock and cushions the head. From "Bike Helmets: Unused
Lifesavers," Consumer Reports (May 1990): 348.
4. Matisse is the best painter ever at putting the viewer at the scene. He's the most
realistic of all modern artists, if you admit the feel of the breeze as necessary to a
landscape and the smell of oranges as essential to a still life. "The Casbah Gate"
depicts the well-known gateway Bab el Aassa, which pierces the southern wall of the
city near the sultan's palace. With scrubby coats of ivory, aqua, blue, and rose
delicately fenced by the liveliest gray outline in art history, Matisse gets the essence of
a Tangier afternoon, including the subtle presence of the bowaab, the sentry who sits
and surveys those who pass through the gate. From Peter Plagens, "Bright Lights."
Newsweek (26 March 1990): 50.
5. While the Sears Tower is arguably the greatest achievement in skyscraper
engineering so far, it's unlikely that architects and engineers have abandoned the quest
for the world's tallest building. The question is: Just how high can a building go?
Structural engineer William LeMessurier has designed a skyscraper nearly one-half
mile high, twice as tall as the Sears Tower. And architect Robert Sobel claims that
existing technology could produce a 500-story building. From Ron Bachman,
"Reaching for the Sky." Dial (May 1990): 15
Exercise 4: Decide whether the paraphrased passages are acceptable or
unacceptable.
Original Source
A key factor in explaining the sad state of American education can be found in
overbureaucratization, which is seen in the compulsion to consolidate our public
schools into massive factories and to increase to mammoth size our universities even
in underpopulated states. The problem with bureaucracies is that they have to work

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hard and long to keep from substituting self-serving survival and growth for their
original primary objective. Few succeed. Bureaucracies have no soul, no memory, and
no conscience. If there is a single stumbling block on the road to the future, it is the
bureaucracy as we know it.
Edward T. Hall, Beyond Culture, Anchor Publishing, 1977, p. 219
Paraphrase 1
American education is overly bureaucratic. This is manifest in the increasing size of
educational institutions, even in small states. Bureaucracies are bad because they tend
to work to promote their own survival and growth rather than that of the institution, as
was their initial objective. Most bureaucracies fail because they have a conscience or a
soul. I believe that bureaucracies are the biggest stumbling block on the road to the
educational future.
 Acceptable
 Unacceptable
Paraphrase 2
Bureaucratization has proved to be a major stumbling block on the road to our
educational future. American institutions have become factories that are more
conducive to the growth of bureaucratic procedures than to the growth of the students
who attend them. Bureaucracies have to work long and hard to keep from promoting
their own survival rather than the educational goals that were their primary objective.
 Acceptable
 Unacceptable
Paraphrase 3
Bureaucratization has proved to be a major stumbling block on the road to our
educational future. American institutions have become factories that are more
conducive to the growth of bureaucratic procedures than to the growth of the students
who attend them. This means that, as Edward T. Hall says in his book, Beyond
Culture, today's educational institutions “have no soul, no memory, and no
conscience.”
 Acceptable
 Unacceptable

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Paraphrase 4
In his book, Beyond Culture, Edward T. Hall discusses the problems posed by the
increasing bureaucratization of American educational institutions. Hall maintains that
overbureaucratization is one of the key factors governing the state of education in
America today. He points to the tendency of bureaucracies to promote their own
growth and survival first and foremost, and observes that few overcome that tendency.
He believes that this is responsible for the fact that many public schools bear a closer
resemblance to factories than to educational institutions. In Hall’s words,
“Bureaucracies have no soul, no memory, and no conscience.”
 Acceptable
 Unacceptable

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