Editing Tips:

Day 1
Dr. Will Kurlinkus
Due This Week
This Week
• Research Log 3
• Email Case 3
After Spring Break
• Tuesday: Peer Review of Full
Report (2 valuable resources,
Statement of Need, and Solutions)
• Set Up Meeting With Me (I can
meet this week as well if you’d like)
• Presentations (4.15, 17, 22)
Email Case 2:
Common Errors
• Introductions: All introductions should have context/exigence (a
statement of need) as well as a prefacing statement (in this email I
describe…). Be careful of double or triple introductions! They should
be quick
• Linking: Remember, we are not using in-text citation (Kurlinkus 5) in
this class, we’re linking instead. Make sure your links go to the actual
article and relink when you come back to a source after introducing
another.
• Subject Lines: Should be specific (context and action) but should not
be a full line long. Same with headings and titles.
• Paragraphs: Each paragraph/section should be a distinct topic. No
giant paragraphs (less than 1/3 of a page)! It’s ok if you have multiple
short paragraphs per section. If you have a section header called the
benefits of hybrid work and have one paragraph with research on
efficiency, DEI, and other companies, you should actually have three
paragraphs.
• Openings: Rid yourself of happy openings (happy Friday, I hope you’re
having a good day, etc.), Dear Aditya is good enough, I don’t need
another at the beginning of the paragraph.
Email Case #3:
Formatting
Make list items and headings parallel: all start with a
• Point (heading & topic sentence), Evidence (your noun, a verb, etc.
bullets), Analysis (your closing on benefits to
company directly).
• Do not underline anything beyond links in this class. You’ll need to bring four items to survive this weekend’s
• Think about vectors and visual hierarchy (headings, trip to Door County:
subheadings, bulleted lists, amount of spacing, 1.A warm sleeping bag
Capitalization)
2.Bug spray
• Lists:
• Make sure you are always introducing your lists 3.A comfortable pair of hiking boots
with at least a one sentence introduction. 4.A USCG life jacket
• Make sure you are outro-ing your lists with a 1
sentence takeaway.
• There is a difference between numbered and
bulleted lists
• Use list headings (a bolded term or phrase
before the colon)
• There should not be one item lists
• Lists should not be full dense paragraphs
 Which Parts
Are Uniformly
Vectored and
Which Aren’t
ChatGPT Email
Case 3 In Small
Groups
Things to Consider in
Your Draft About the
Challenge Description
1. Do early career professionals in your industry do
this task—especially important for client
communication scenarios (will you actually be
talking to/directly pitching clients?)
2. Is there multiple problems here? How can I focus
myself on one aspect?
3. Is there multiple contexts here (this problem
happens in team meetings, presentations, client
meetings, etc.) How can I focus on one
communication context?
4. Do I have clear examples and for instances?
5. Do I have proof (articles, interviews, etc.) that this
is a problem?
6. Do I actually illustrate what is getting in the way of
my process/goal? What is CAUSING the problem?
1. Give Me One Solution
That’s Good and that
teaches me how
2. Give Me Another That
Breaks My Guessing
Machine
Be wary of the easy tech solution that
doesn’t actually address the original
problem. My manager won’t get back to
me quickly so I’ll program an AI to alarm
him every time I have a question. But
why didn’t the manager email you back
in the first place? Is this a
communication or a technological
solution?
Comm Challenge
Solutions
1. Callbacks: Your solutions should be directly related to the problem(s)
you describe. If they aren’t you will receive points off. Think very
carefully about this. Reference/callback the specific problems and
partners in solutions.
2. Be Specific/Teach Me Something I Don’t Know: Your solutions
should think carefully not just how to solve something but how to
solve something in the best way—what are best practices in
simplifying data presentation or visualizing data. If you just say
visualizations can help simplify complex data. Visuals are easy to
understand-–you’ll probably get a low C for this section.
3. Demonstrate: Your solutions shouldn’t be general. Like the problem, I
need to see examples of what you mean by your solution. Give me a
hypothetical situation or describe a solution from your research.
4. Show Me How: Your solutions should ideally be stepped: first do this,
then do this, finally do this.
Your Solutions Should Explain
• What: What are two tactics you can take to address the Feasible Solutions are S.M.A.R.T
problem? Make sure one is a bit unique. Key terms from
research? • Specific: Here’s the stepped plan of what
• Who: Who are the members of the team needed to solve we’ll do and who will do it. Here’s the
the problem. What will their roles and actions be? How research on why we’re doing it this
does the what need to be distributed. Who has the power specific way.
to take action?
• Measurable: Here’s how I will know it
• Where: Where will these events, actions, and tactics worked. Some concrete measurement
take place? What type of meeting/media works best? mechanisms like a survey, client
• When: What parts of the process does this solution interview, number of mistakes made.
effect? How must it occur across time? • Attainable: Here’s why this is feasible. It’s
• Why/Feasibility: What proof do you have this will work the easiest way. It’s not expensive or time
(hint—it’s your research). What are best practices of this consuming.
solution?
• Why do it in this way and not another? Are there things that • Relevant: Here’s how this is directly
might go wrong with your solution? Are there easier ways? related to the problem I described in my
Less expensive ways? Will people in power actually do this?
Why?
need section. Is it sidestepping/not
addressing the true source of the
• How: What are the specific steps? How will you actually problem.
address the problem? What will be made/done? Who will
make it? When will this happen? Think SMART objectives. • Time Bound: Here’s how long training will
take, building things will take, etc.
Reverse Shadowing: Enhancing Cross-Team Collaboration
A technique called “reverse shadowing,” invented by educational researchers John and Julie Borg, can bridge the
communication gap between marketing and creative teams mentioned above by having team members temporarily step
into each other’s roles. Marketers attend creative brainstorming sessions, while designers sit in on marketing strategy
meetings, fostering mutual understanding and reducing misalignment.
In fact, a 2021 Harvard Business Review study found that such cross-functional learning improves collaboration by
increasing empathy and alignment. At IMG, implementing quarterly reverse shadowing could streamline communication
and prevent inefficiencies. The process would involve:
1. Pair Team Members Strategically – Assign each marketing team member a creative counterpart based on the types of campaigns they
typically collaborate on (e.g., sponsorship deals for the Miami Open or social media promotions for the Wimbledon hospitality
experience).
2. Conduct Shadowing Sessions – Each quarter, marketers attend a creative brainstorming meeting to observe how designers
conceptualize assets, while designers sit in on a marketing strategy session to understand branding and sponsor priorities.
3. Create a Shadowing Workbook – Participants complete a short reflection form on communication gaps, unexpected challenges, and
areas for alignment.
4. Hold a Debrief Meeting – After shadowing, pairs meet for a 30-minute discussion to exchange insights and propose improvements to
their workflow.
5. Implement Key Takeaways – Management collects feedback from participants and integrates suggested process improvements, such
as adjusting briefing templates or scheduling structured check-ins between teams.
For example, during the Miami Open sponsorship campaign, a marketing team member shadowing a creative meeting notices that designers
struggle with last-minute requests due to vague brand guidelines. After discussing this in the debrief, the marketing team updates its briefing
process to include clearer logo placement rules and sample messaging upfront. This alignment reduces revision cycles and ensures the final
campaign meets both branding and creative standards efficiently.

By combining structured creative briefing with reverse shadowing, IMG can address both the process and relationship challenges in cross-
functional collaboration. A standardized creative brief ensures that marketing and creative teams start with clear expectations, reducing confusion
from the outset. Meanwhile, reverse shadowing fosters deeper understanding by allowing team members to experience each other’s workflows
firsthand. Together, these solutions create a proactive, well-aligned communication process, minimizing inefficiencies and ensuring that
sponsorship campaigns—like those for the Miami Open—are both strategically sound and creatively compelling.
Where Do I Find
Solutions?
1. Scholar.google.com
2. Type your search “simplifying data
presentations for clients”
3. If you don’t get hits rephrase
4. Set your date range to fit your
resources (2020)
5. Ideally use the advanced search
button to search your field:
"simplifying data presentations for
clients:real estate”
6. Think about other fields that might
have the same problem: I’m talking
about presenting medical advice to
kids, who else has to teach kids
complex subjects? Teachers.
Editing Tips
• Transitions (Therefore, however, similarly), indicators (for example, for instance,
first, second), and callbacks (as stated earlier, as previously discussed): Include
transition words, connections, and callbacks—similar to headings, they create a
pathway through your text and make it easy to scan.
• Avoid Free Floating This: When you use this in a sentence, always add an anchor
word. This is very hard to accomplish vs. This goal is very hard to accomplish.
• Avoid Unnecessary Repetition of the Same Word: Exp. The samples were
prepped for mounting in Bakelite by grinding one side of the sample and removing
any debris that formed on the sample during heat treatment.
• Quotes vs. Paraphrase
• Eliminate Meta Discourse:
o Wordy: I would like to point out that it has become clear that we need to analyze this situation more fully in order to
understand it.

o Concise: The situation requires further analysis.